254 Transcript: Releasing Pain and Guilt: Embracing Change and Setting Boundaries with Love and Kindness

Heal Yourself Change Your Life

Click here to listen to episode 254

Please note: These are computer generated transcripts of the Heal Yourself, Change Your Life Podcast Episodes. If you have any questions or need assistance, please reach out to us at support@brandygillmore.com

Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life changing injury, it's become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I'll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind and your body. and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.

Let's begin.

Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here, continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it. And I just love today's episode. There are just so many key insights or I know just a lot of great Things that our current volunteer might be going through that I know that a lot of other people may struggle with as well.

So I love that. Another thing that I love is the counterintuitive insights from today's episode, because so often people will think when it comes to self healing, We have to really just think positive and visualize ourselves being healed and happy and healthy or going to the gym and feeling incredible.

And what you'll notice is that our volunteer, as she wisely experiences and notices in her own life, that some of those things actually trigger her pain. which is completely counterintuitive for a lot of people. And yet we'll be able to see that, you know, that just the mind works in a different way than most people realize.

And so again, there are just so many really helpful insights from today's episode. And I'm going to warn you ahead of time, you are absolutely going to fall in love with our volunteer. Not because she's injured or sick or going through her stuff or whatnot, but because she's so incredible. She's so sweet and she just, she's just pure love.

She is pure love and she's sweet and she's got great self awareness. She's just beautiful inside and out and just this young vibrant being who unfortunately has been going through. health issues and pain and all of these things, who's turning it around in a most beautiful way. In fact, I have to say ahead of time, spoiler alert a bit, but after our session, which we did last week, she's messaged in several times and, and just, and just so much sweetness, so much sweetness, but she's messaged in and she says, you know, immediately after.

this session that we did, she messaged and she said, I don't even know how or why I feel so amazing and it's beautiful. And of course she did it. And that's what I love is that she did it and just in a beautiful way and embracing change with ease. And that's one of the many things that I love about today's episode is you'll see, and you'll notice, That she's really willing to change in an easeful way, even when I push her a bit, she's just really willing to just embrace the change.

easel it. So it just, I love that. Everything from it being counterintuitive to common insights, to things that you might be experiencing, to just her heart. I mean, there are just so many beautiful insights from today's episode and our volunteer. And I just, you'll hear me say it all of the time because it's so true, but we get the best podcast volunteers, just beautiful, beautiful beings, great hearts, great self awareness.

And that is so true. with today's volunteer as well. And so on that note, let's go ahead and step in with our beautiful volunteer, Cordelia. Here we go.

There we go. Are you there? Yes, I'm here. Can you hear me? I can hear you. It's wonderful to connect with you. It's, it's wonderful to connect with you. Hi, beautiful. Hi, how are you? I'm doing fantastic. Thank you. How are you doing? I'm doing good, thank you. Beautiful, I love that. And what can I help you with today?

Yeah, um, I got to your page after Well, I'm gonna like share my story first, and then I'm gonna show you how I got into your page. Um, about two years ago, uh, I started having Like some very intense back pain, like along all my whole life I had some back episodes, but nothing too serious, it was just like, uh, twice, maybe three times a year when I was having some back aches, and it was like one week.

Like being like slowing down my rhythm and everything was good, but two years ago I was doing a yoga class for context. I really liked going to the gym and doing heavy lifting and But that day I was just doing yoga And I got stuck like doing a yoga, very, very simple exercise. Like I got all my breath taken out of me because of the pain.

And I was like, okay, here we go again. It's one of those normal episodes. So everything's going to be okay in a week or two. Uh, fast forward one month and it wasn't getting better. Um, so I decided to go to a doctor, uh, a family doctor, um, because the Pains actually started to spread all over my body. It was very, very weird.

Like from always having some back, um, lower back ache, it was up to my neck. It was really weird. And like two weeks, um, fast forwarding, like two weeks, it became a pain in my whole body. I mean, I cannot describe how horrible that was. It was like having. A fire inside of me, like inside of me, like just, I feel like energy, like up and down into my fingertips, into my, in my toes, everywhere, like every, everywhere.

So I was in the hospital for like three days, just having um, like, Pain meds in my body just to like break the pain cycle. But after those three days, like being connected for the whole three days, um, I was not better. I mean, I was a little better, but the pain Never really like went away. So then I started doing some physical therapy.

Um, well, and I need to say that the scans that they took me, I had x rays and CT scans and MRIs and not CT scans, MRIs. And everything was normal. And, um, they told me like that your levels of, or of pain, they don't match the description that you're giving me. You broke up a little bit, so they said that it doesn't match the painting.

What did you say? Yeah, in my mind, I was thinking like, that's not right. I mean, I'm, I'm, I'm a person that I don't complain a lot because of pain. I, um, I never go to the doctor just because I want to. Um, so that was an extreme case for me. So that happened. So then I started going to physical therapy, like just to keep going with some kind of treatment because the pain wasn't going away.

And that was the first time that I was like, Something is really wrong with me because I was on pain meds every day and they were like heavy, heavy pain meds and the pain will only go down from 10 to an 8 on a good day. Then after maybe one month or two months of going to physical therapy, the therapist told me like, You don't belong here, like, I don't know why you keep coming here.

Your pain, your, your scans and all that, the lab work, it doesn't match with what you're saying. Like, there's no reason that you need to keep coming here if you're not getting better. I think that you should go to, to a psychiatrist because But I mean, in basic words, he said, like, you're crazy and you're making everything up.

All right, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I love her. I just absolutely love her determination to stand up for herself and say, okay, I need to find a solution to this and to keep going and not be crushed by what other people are saying. So I just love that strength, her determination, her self awareness.

Number one, I love that. Now, the other thing is, number two, I want to bring in some perspective here for a moment because when we stop and think about it, You may have heard of phantom pain before, but if we think about phantom pain, which is basically where a, an amputee, you know, somebody who has unfortunately lost a limb, you know, has had a amputation for one reason or another, research has shown that there's an 80 to 90 percent chance that they can still experience physical pain.

Even though the limb is gone. So where the limb would be, they still experience physical pain. As though, you know, if somebody's lost an arm, they can still experience pain in that arm, even though it's no longer there. And that is well known. Now, when you stop and think about it, nobody tells them, Hey, well, let's go get your brain checked.

You're just crazy. Okay. And, and of course, They're, you know, when we stop and think about it, that's, pain does happen in the brain. But all sensation happens in the brain. If something's hot or something's cold, that happens in the brain. You know, and we have sensory information. We have the somatosensory cortex.

We have part of the brain that senses information. So, everything really does work. ultimately happen in the brain anyway. But my point in mentioning this is that nobody really says to somebody who's gone through an unfortunate situation, you know, having an amputation, I have so much compassion. And I've also seen people of course, step up and, you know, and, and really thrive still where they say, I'm not going to be a victim and still thrive, even though they've gone through that experience.

So kudos to them, because I've seen, um, a lot of different situations and, you know, through the years. And, and so. So I have absolute compassion and I've still seen them, you know, show up and give their all and still flourish in life. So, uh, compassion and also yet empowerment. But my point in mentioning that is that I've seen, you know, unfortunately an amputee, somebody who has gone through an amputation can still experience physical pain.

And research has shown that back to back to back, you know, 80 to 90 percent will still experience physical pain at some point in time. Now, nobody says to them, Oh, well, you're just crazy. What's wrong with you? However, when people have physical pain and they still have the body there, you know, such as in Cordelia's case, and they say, Oh, well you need to go get your head checked.

You know, a lot of times, It can be said in a condescending way where people feel crushed or like something's wrong with them, or they're just crazy. And when you stop and think about it, if we put it in this perspective, that people who have even lost a limb, 80 to 90 percent of people, who have lost a limb can still experience physical pain.

We don't need to shame people who don't have some type of physical issue that's also showing up, because there's so much going on in the body, and in the nervous system, and in the energy, and all over the body. All of these things that we can't necessarily always see and when we think about energy and the impact that it can have on the physical body, you know, on past episodes we've talked about bio photons and, and just the awareness that, you know, if you think about it, our bodies are made of energy.

Everything is. And, and we think about atoms and, and the physical body, I mean, is, isn't so physical when we stop and think about it. It's what, made of six primary elements, what, hydrogen, nitrogen, carbon, calcium, oxygen, and phosphorus. I mean, so when we stop and think about it, yes, we have the physical body and not only do we have our body made up of elements, but then we also have energy and bio photons and we have so many things going on.

So my point is just simply this, is two things. Number one, I love how she became an advocate for herself and said, okay, I just have to find a solution. And she kept looking and, and I love that about her and her self awareness. And number two is that if you have experienced some type of feeling of feeling shamed or wronged, or, you know, minimized in any way, because there is no quote unquote physical Doctors can find, I would encourage you to think about phantom pain and the awareness that that is how our bodies can work in a variety of different ways with the nervous system and the mind and that it can be very, very common.

And so please don't be critical or ashamed or beat yourself up for any reason. And also, by the way, number three is this, is that you'll notice I don't ever speak poorly about anybody. That is never the goal ever. That's not why I'm here. And so if your doctors do say something in that way, instead of being mean or being angry or being upset or feeling shamed or anything like that, of course, Notice what Cordelia did where she said, okay, look, I'm just going to keep looking for the answers.

And I think that that is just beautiful. The way she navigated and said, okay, look, I'm just going to continue to look outside the box. And of course, if you're here, then you've been doing that very thing. So, so much respect. And I just, I love her self awareness. I love the way she's showing up. And, on that note, let's go ahead and dive back in with our beautiful volunteer, Cordelia.

Here we go.

And if I ask you your mom's, uh, your, your mother's, uh, first initial, what's their first initial? A. Okay, give me one second.

Bingo. Uh, and you have a sister? Yes. And can you give me her first initial please? C. Bingo. Okay. And so, uh, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. Bingo. There's a feeling, um, bingo. There was a, uh, it feels like a big upset with her. Are you familiar with that? An upset with my sister? Yeah. Or Bingo. With your sister.

I mean, we get along together, but, uh, like every sister, we, we have our fights. I mean, yesterday we did fight, just sister things, but we don't have a bad relationship. Okay. And if I ask you to notice the part of you that, at times, you feel like you could get really upset, Or maybe even say things and get upset, say things you don't mean or get upset, yada, yada.

If I ask you how much you can see that, what would you say? If I can see how I get upset or where I feel it. Um, if you could, yeah, if you could see just the part of you that gets upset and maybe says, says things that aren't, aren't really nice, gets, just gets upset. Can you see that? Yeah. Mm hmm. So I'm going to ask you to breathe.

Bingo. And if I ask you, is that, is that something you'd be willing to change? Yeah, of course. Okay. Now by the way, bingo. If I ask you to notice, whenever you guys have an upset, the part of you that feels like you can end up, like, stewing over things, like being really, just, uh, frustrated inside pretty intensely.

Can you see that? Yeah. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. And can you also see the part of you that just loves her so, so, so, so, so, so, so much also? Yes, of course. Yes, yes, yes, of course. So I'm going to ask you to breathe,

and if I ask you zero to ten, how much you would say that at times you can have a bit of a temper? What would you say, zero to ten? Like a three. I, I normally don't have a very bad temper. Um, I'm more on the calm side. Okay. If I ask you on the inside, how much you would say you can find yourself stewing?

Zero to ten. Emotionally on the inside, what you would say. Wow, well, I never thought of that, but yeah, it would be like an eight. Bingo, thank you. I love your self awareness. I love your self awareness. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. And I would have said as far as the temper, I would have said a little bit higher also, maybe a bit higher, but so there's that too.

Um, bingo, bingo. Give me one second. And by the way, who's older, you or your sister? Me. Okay. And, uh, but if I asked you how much at times you feel like she tries to tell you what to do, what would you say? Yes. A hundred percent. Yes. That's why I was trying to figure out who was older, because it felt like you, and then it feels like you get annoyed of her trying to tell you what to do.

Can you see that? Yeah. Actually, I was just thinking about that, uh, on my way here, because she's It's always like asking me to do some favors and things, and I feel like I never get treatment in return. Bingo. Okay, so I want you to notice how much it annoys you that she's asking you to do things, or asking you, telling you to do this, or this, or this, and I want you to notice how much that annoys you.

Can you see it? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So if I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe and bingo, there's also a feeling sometimes where you feel like she's going to ask you or tell you to do something or whatnot where you kind of want to even avoid her. Can you see that? Yes. Bingo. Okay. So if I ask you, how could you address it instead.

Like, if you were going to change this pattern, and, and let me name a couple things. So, maybe when she asks you to do something for her or whatnot, maybe you say, you know what, actually, I would love to, I was going to ask you, could you also do this and this and this for me? That would be really, really, really helpful.

So, then it feels like she's also helping you with things, right? Yeah. Or doing things for you, okay? Or maybe what you do is maybe she asks, and maybe you say, you know what, I would love to, or maybe you say, you know what, actually I'm working on some other things right now, do you think you could ask somebody else to do it, please?

I love you, and I adore you, and also, I'm in, I'm working on some other things or, or just saying, you know what I like, but being able to say no, not because you're injured, not because you're in pain, but just being able to say no, because you want to say no. If you said, you know what, I love you and. And, and I don't really feel like doing that though, right?

How does that feel to you? I think it makes feelings. I would like to say no just because I want to but at the same time I will feel like bad for saying no to things that maybe I could do but at the same time I'm thinking that is making me uncomfortable. But I know I will be like a bad sister if I don't help you, if I have the means to, or if I can't do, but I just don't want to because I say no.

Okay, now wait a second.

All right, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I just love her self awareness. I love her self honesty. So beautiful. And notice what she's experiencing, this feeling of feeling that, you know, if she says no, she's a bad sister and she's going to feel bad and guilty.

And then also on the other side, she's been feeling overwhelmed and that she's got to do everything for everybody and, and overwhelmed and nobody does things for her. So there's that feeling of feeling stuck, like she's overwhelmed, but then she can't say no, and that she would feel bad and guilty. And there's a couple points to note here.

First and foremost, that instead of just saying, you know, no and being upset, or Having a health issue and saying no because I have a health issue that there's kind there are there are kind ways to say No that can still navigate the relationship in a beautiful way and that of course is where you'd want to go in this type of situation is to be able to be loving and kind and and navigate this in a way that preserves love because let's be honest we also need love and what can happen is that if we just get upset and say no it could actually cause more health issues and more problems or if we feel bad or guilty it can of course affect the physical body and so there's all of these different emotions that come up and so being able to communicate and address these things in a new way may seem simple.

But it's also really important in helping to just get unstuck and being able to move things forward. And so that's where we're going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer Cordelia. Here we go.

Notice the first option was saying, you know what? I'd be happy to do that when I'm doing that for you. Do you think you could do this and this and this for me to help me get that done, please? Yes, that actually Imagine it. It feels really good. Great. So maybe what you could do is you could think about something.

So let's say you expect that she's going to ask you to drive her somewhere, to do this or that or the other, right? Some type of favor or whatever, right? Yes. And so, you say, hey, you know, I would be happy to, and then you have an idea of something that you would love for her to help you with also, and you say, great, you know what, I'm happy to do that, and by the way, would you be able to do this for me?

Uh, and then you ask her, right? Mm hmm. Okay, so how does that feel to you? Yeah, really good. Actually, I never thought of that, but I would feel really good and I would feel appreciated. And if he says no, there I can have the chance to say like, well, then I can't help you because I need to do my thing.

Exactly. Right? Instead of feeling overwhelmed and like one more thing and one more thing and oh, you're gonna be a bad sister if not and all of these things. So, simple shift, right? So, I'm gonna ask you to breathe, but you could, you could do this. And by the way, think about how young you are right now and imagine your entire life if you guys have this pattern.

But you have a pattern of reciprocity where she, maybe she, who knows, maybe you guys are in your 40s and, and, and she asks you for something, you say, great. And by the way, could sister, could you do this and this and this? And it feels like, um, like a give and receive, a reciprocity and helping each other out.

How wonderful does that feel? Yeah, that would be amazing. Beautiful. I love that. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Bingo. And I'm going to ask you to breathe, and notice you don't have to be frustrated. You don't have to feel upset. You don't have to feel like she never does things for you. You could ask.

Because you haven't been asking. Notice that. You haven't been asking her. Can you see that? Yes. That is true. I, I usually don't ask for things. I expect things, but I have trouble asking things. Okay, now how's that gonna go? If you expect things but you don't ask for things. Now imagine, by the way, imagine if your sister was sitting there at home, expecting you to do something, expecting you to do something, expecting you to do something, but she never even asked or told you.

What are the chances you think you would do it? Yeah, no, zero. Zero, right? Yeah. And then notice then you feel unloved and you feel like your feelings are hurt because nobody's doing the things that you want them to do for you, but you've never communicated it, right? Yes, that is true, very true. Very true, very true.

So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Okay, and so I'm going to ask you to breathe and notice you could let go of the hurt and the upset and the Unloved and the resistance and the guilt and the blah blah blah and not wanting to have to do anything and you could actually just Shift this dynamic in a beautiful way that made it So you guys have a reciprocity and an exchange and a love and a connection and it just it feels even more Giving and even more flowing, right?

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, and of course, if she says no, she can't do it, then you can say, well, okay, well, then I'm going to do that, and, and so it, it, it, so then you don't have to worry about feeling overwhelmed either, because if she says no, then you say, okay, well, then I'm going to do that instead, and, and so it, you don't have to feel the overwhelm.

Does that make sense? Yes, yes, yes, a lot. A lot. So I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I'm going to ask you to take in the feeling that you can let go of the frustration, you can let go of all the upset, you can let go of avoiding her, because even if you think about it, you just have something like if you, especially if you expect that she's going to ask for something, you kind of just have something in mind that when she does ask, Then you already have something that you could ask her to do.

And so you, you kind of, you don't have to avoid her. You don't have to resist or any of that. You could just be in flow. Does that make sense? Yes, a lot. A lot. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Okay, so I want you to notice your level of pain. Zero to ten. What's your level? I'm gonna have five. Bingo. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe.

Bingo. And now I want you to notice the part of you that can feel really pissed off on the inside. Just frustrated over like that feeling of overwhelm and like pissed off. Can you see that? Like at level eight, nine on the inside. Yes. Yes. Okay, so I love your awareness. I love your awareness. And, uh, bingo.

And I'm gonna ask you to breathe, and if I ask you how long you want to hold on to that, what would you say? Never. Nothing. Not a single second anymore. Okay, so I'm going to push a little bit. Okay, I'm going to push a little bit, and I'm going to say, No, no, you go ahead and hold on to those pissed off feelings.

Go ahead if you want. Go ahead and hold on to those feelings if you want, or you could decide to just let them go and move things forward in a more beautiful way, right? Yes, yes, I want to do that. Great. So if you let go of those pissed feelings, how would you feel instead? How would you feel? Instead, love, connection, happiness, and flow, you could actually, uh, let go of the upset and instead move forward in a feeling of love and connection and, and, and harmony?

Yes. Yes. What would that look like? Yeah. Well, I, I will feel love and happy. That would mean in, in my actions, I will go to a place and I will I will be just happy to help because I will know that I'm being supported and that I'm being taken care of and that I'm being also loved and thinking, um, that, that everyone else is also like thinking of me and not feeling like I'm the only one who cares and thinks for others.

Bingo. And so I'm going to ask you to breathe. And I want you to notice for a moment how many times you've been so upset, feeling like you are the only one who cares and does everything for everybody, and you're the only one who cares and does everything for everybody. If I ask you, how many times you've been upset over that?

How many times would you say that is? Many times. Like, I can't even count them. Exactly. So I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I'm going to push a little bit. Okay, so I'm going to push a bit, and I'm going to say, go ahead and keep telling yourself that if you want. I wouldn't recommend it. I would change if I were you.

Bingo. Yes. Great, great, great, great, great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. and what it would feel like to feel like proud of doing things for others and being wonderful and sweet and also proud of your family then helping out too and doing all kinds of things and feeling really great and, and by the way, do you plan on having kids in your future?

Yes. Yes. Now imagine when you have children. If you feel like you have to do everything, everything, everything, everything all of the time, or you feel like you have a spouse who's loving and supportive and helps out too, and then the children grow up and they help out too, and it feels like you have more support, or if you feel like you always have to do everything yourself, what does that look like?

No, that's, that's my dream to have a supporting and a caring partner who, who makes me feel loved and taken care of. That, that doesn't make me feel like I always have to ask and do everything by myself or to feel Maybe I'm interrupting you and the reason is, is because notice as you're saying that, as you started saying, I've always feel like I have to do everything myself.

Like I don't want you to bring the pain up. Okay, because part of it is connected to that feeling. So even when you say it, I want, I don't want you to say it with so much energy. Uh, because we're going to go backwards. Okay. Yes. Okay. So I'm going to ask you to breathe.

All right. So let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I love her self awareness. I love her self honesty, and I also love how easy she is right now in just embracing the change, where she went to go back into the old story. And notice what I said to her is I said, well, I'm going to push you a bit.

And also, then I just interrupted her and she just let me Very easily interrupt her like, okay, okay. And then notice she's laughing. Now, my point in this is let's be honest, it's really hard to change somebody who doesn't want to change. And if you're wanting to change and you're willing to change, it becomes a lot easier.

Now notice for a moment, how much she says, okay. I'm going to change. I'm willing to change. And it's easy. And that's the something that you'll want to notice with yourself is that, is that a few things. So notice that I did, it said, I'm going to, I'm going to push you. Now, how hard do I need to push her?

Not very hard because she shifts so easy. She's like, okay, I'm willing to change. And the reason that I point this out is because. This was me, meaning that when I was going through my injury, I was very stubborn. So I was not easy to change. I was stubborn. I had a lot of resistance to change, even though I didn't realize it.

And I was not aware that I was resisting change. But then once I became aware that I was resisting change, I then shifted and said, okay, universe, whatever you want, I'm easy. All change. And so, so I feel like kind of, you know, if we think about the last episode, 253, where we worked with our beautiful volunteer, Kahiso, I feel like in some ways she was kind of resistant like me, you know, like, and different.

We had our differences, but there was resistance. Let's say, and going into the old or feeling stuck or feeling, you know, and, and of course, you know, hers was different than my situation. Mine had fear, et cetera, et cetera. But there was just still a lot of resistance in very different ways. Resistance. And now we see this beautiful being right here.

You know, when I ask her to change, she, she laughs and is like, okay. I'll change like just so easy. And I would say, this is me now that if there's something that I need to change, I'm like, okay, I'll change it. I'll embrace change. And so I want to invite you in your own life that to have an open mind. And that if there are things that you need to be willing to change, to ultimately do that, to be willing to change, by the way.

what you'll notice. I mentioned there are some pieces that were counterintuitive. And so there's a reason that I'm pushing on this part, because as you'll see coming up, there's a counterintuitive piece that's really keeping her from being able to heal herself. And you'll notice that when we step back in.

So that's where we're going as we step back in with beautiful Cordelia. Here we go. And

thank you for letting me interrupt a bit on that. And so I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now I want you to notice how much you have wanted to have a partner who's supportive and, and how much this topic has bothered you. Can you see that? Yes. Yeah. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And so now you've been listening to podcasts.

So, you know, patterns breed more of the same and patterns breed more of the same, et cetera. Right? Yes. Okay. So, this is the thing, okay, so now I want you to notice. You ready? Yes. So, can you see the part of you who feels like if you're sick or in pain then you can say no and it's okay to say no if you're not feeling good.

Can you see that? Yes. So, what I'm trying to do is shift it even more, and there's a part of you that feels really awkward and bad saying no, like you can't say no to them, but if you have a health issue then you feel like you can say, I don't feel good and so I can't. Can you see that? Yes. Yes. Now, this is the thing, You're young and you're beautiful, just inside and out.

You're just a beautiful, beautiful being. And you don't want to live a life where the only way you can say no to somebody is if you're sick. If you say, Oh, but I'm sick, so I can't. Like, you don't want to be then in your 30s and 40s and 50s and 60s going, Oh, but I can't because I'm sick. So you don't want to have that, that to be the only way that you can say no is if you're sick.

You have injury and illness and all of that. Does that make sense? Yes, yes, a lot. A lot, right? So, I love your awareness. You're just, you're so impressive. I love your awareness, and so Thank you. It's just, yep, it's beautiful. But now I want you to notice how awkward it feels the idea of saying no or the idea of asking for what it is that you want.

Can you see that? Yes. Yes, especially the thing with asking. Mm hmm. Zero to ten. How awkward does it feel to ask? Ten. Ten. Right? So it feels easier to say no if you have all this pain and a problem and a health issue. It feels easier to say no than to just ask and ask for things and ask for support. But it's not easier.

It's easier. Because the thing of it is, is that if you can only say no if you're not feeling well, then the problem is, is that your brain is going to feel like it's beneficial to have an illness or problem so that you can say no. Does that make sense? Yes. Yes, it makes a lot of sense, but at the same time, I, I feel Go ahead.

I, I see that and, and something very weird that I've noticed is when I start visualizing myself going to the gym and doing, doing all these exercises that I love and I used to do, the pain starts even just if I imagine going and doing things. Uh huh. Bingo. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe.

All right, so let's go ahead and actually pause the session right here. Now, first and foremost, I love her self awareness and her self honesty and how well she sees herself and sees what's happening in her mind and the way that it affects her body. I just, I am just so impressed with this beautiful young woman.

I love her self awareness. And I want to unpack this because I know that for so many people, this is exactly opposite of what we've been told and what we hear. And this is exactly what I have seen over and over and over again throughout the years are things like this that are very counterintuitive and that are opposite.

of what you would think for mind body healing. I mean, let's be honest. How often have we heard, you know, picture yourself healthy and happy and working out and at the gym and feeling incredible and feel those feelings. And that's going to be so great to do. And notice for a moment, as she just mentioned, when she sees herself working out at the gym, feeling great, it actually triggers her pain to go away.

And that is the key point that you'll want to really take in because I just, I cannot tell you how many times over the years I've had people say, but I'm picturing myself healthy and happy and feeling incredible and wonderful. And I'm not healing or I'm getting worse and worse. And I can tell you, I've seen people with all kinds of health issues from, you know, terminal issues to autoimmune conditions, to pain, to you, name it, who say.

things exactly like this. You know, maybe it's not their pain going up, but maybe they're trying to heal themselves for years and years and years and years. And they have the vision of them being healthy and happy and fit and perfect and wonderful. And yet their health is continuing to decline. or they're not healing themselves.

It is all of the time. And so I would say a few things that you'll want to notice is number one is that notice that as we just talked on the last segment, there's a part of her who feels bad for not doing for others and she also has a hard time Receiving for herself. So, of course, if she goes to the gym and she's doing something for herself, or she's healthy and happy and doing things for herself, there's a part of her who feels for herself.

bad. Like she's a bad person and guilty and she shouldn't be doing things for herself. And that's part of the reason that I want to pause it is exactly that, is I want to invite you to look at this in your own life and just make sure that you feel good about being able to do things for yourself. for yourself.

And I want to invite you to just take this in and feel that because I can't tell you how often this comes up. In fact, you'll hear me say all of the time because something else I've seen over and over and over throughout the years is this is people will take in feelings of gratitude. You know, they hear that to heal themselves, they should start feeling grateful and they go, okay, well I just need to feel grateful for my healing, grateful for my life and the same thing happens.

They don't realize. that it's actually triggering them. And you know, they'll feel guilty or undeserving or not good enough. And so they go backwards or they stay stuck. And so of course the answer is not to say, you know, just don't ever feel gratitude. It's being careful of how to bring in gratitude and making sure that you're in a place of receiving.

And so what you'll notice anytime that I speak on gratitude, I always couple it with either. you know, a feeling of feeling deserving or even, you know, in my TEDx talk, I, the way I coupled it there was, was specific, even though most people don't realize it, you know, I had a feeling of feeling gratitude.

And then I said, and feeling confidence in self. Why did I use confidence next? Because a lot of times if people are stepping into a feeling of confidence, then they're also feeling deserving to bring in confidence. And so it can be coupled together. But my point is, is that either way, you want to take in that feeling of feeling like you're able to receive.

And so that's what I want to invite you to look at in this episode is exactly that is I'm asking you, do you feel good about being able to receive and how does that feel for you? And if you don't have that dialed in, then I want to invite you to look at that and really create a shift around that so you feel that in your subconscious mind.

Now there's another insight that I want to provide you with and it's this. It's that, notice, she only thought, like, even when she just thinks and pictures going to the gym, it triggers her pain. It's something that is imagined. And, All of the time, I'll see people who are trying to, you know, heal themselves in their lives and they look for some type of trauma or problem or event that must have happened.

And many times it can be exactly that, just an emotion that is going on in their head that didn't even happen. And even if you think about it, there was a past podcast episode of a man who even had, just was thinking about. cheating and having an affair in his relationship and it was triggering pain inside of him and he didn't even do anything.

He didn't take any action on it and he didn't plan on taking any action on it but he felt so guilty about having these thoughts about another woman that he was just, he was feeling all of this pain and he didn't do anything but just the guilt and the feeling bad and all of that. And so that's the point when you hear me say over and over again, that we really all need to understand our own mind, our own body, our own ability to use our minds, to heal ourselves, change our lives.

You know, that is the gift. And by the way, you'll hear me say over and over and over again, the gift is not the problem. Like the problem, the illness, the issue, that isn't the gift. But when we change, when we really embrace change, change is the gift. That is the key. And so noticing for a moment, as we started talking to with Cordelia, as far as embracing a change, that's where the life changing gift becomes.

You know, when you think about who she gets to be. or even we started talking about the bigger picture of her life. That is the gift. And so I always, you'll hear me emphasize, you know, you never want to link up in your mind that the problem is the gift. And sometimes people in an effort to think positively, a person will want to link up and say, Oh, well, this illness was a gift.

And I always tell people the illness is not the gift. My accident, my injury, let's be honest, most people never get better from what I had. And of course we want that to change. But my point is just that the illness or the injury or the accident or the symptom is not the gift, the real gift. is in the change.

When we embrace change, that was the gift. So the fact that I became empowered, that was the gift. And I changed, and I identified what was going on, that was the gift. And so when we say heal yourself, change your life, it's a life changing gift. The gift is in the change. The gift is not in the problem, or the symptom, or the hardship, or the negativity, or the hurt.

And so what I love is watching how fast and how readily she's willing to change. It's just beautiful because then it's easier to embrace the gift. And so I just love that so much. And of course, that's where we're going on the next episode, because as you'll notice, It's going to take a deeper level of transformation of rewiring her mind at a deeper level to really create that change.

And so that's where we're going on the second part of this session, which we're going to talk about next week. And for now, of course, taking this in, seeing how you can apply this in your own life. And also I want to ask you to please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode.

You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don't even know, because the more that every single person feels empowered and each person is happy and healthy and loved and loving. The better this world is for all of us. And so please do make a point to hit the share button on this episode.

And please do make a point to have a most wonderful, fantastic, loving, happy, healthy rest of your day. And I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We'll see you there.

Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touch their heart or help them stay positive in hard times or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness. Of how amazing we all really are.

If today's episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about, or those, you know, who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point. And the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world Consciousness by showing everyone.

What we are all capable of. And of course each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming, to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand and use your mind. You are incredible.

And I do wanna be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You'll want to remember that there's so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore.

com slash podcast. And if you're currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well. Lastly, Please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won't want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you'll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you're capable of with your mind.

Thank you.

Are you ready to learn how to do this?

Heal Yourself, Change Your Life

From Illness To Wellness: 4 Easy Steps To Transform Your Health & Life With The GIFT Healing Method™

In this course Brandy shares the exact things she did to heal (even when doctors told her there was nothing more she could do) so you too can be empowered with tools and techniques to heal yourself and change your life. Click here to learn more.

Share This Eposide
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
WhatsApp
Email

Note: If you are hearing or sight impaired or have any other medical issues that would inhibit you from fully accessing the podcast, please reach out to our team at support@brandygillmore.com and we will be happy to assist you.  

Also, please remember that genuine change and follow through are key for self-healing results. If you struggle with negative thoughts or have a chronic health issue or chronic pain, please do not avoid seeing your doctor.

Instead, your goal with self-healing should be to continue to see your doctor as recommended and blow their mind with what you are capable of with your mind and with the power of mind-body healing.  Please enjoy this self-healing podcast!

FREE 2-Hour Master Training Class

Heal Yourself, Change Your Life