Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life! My name is Brandy Gilmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it has become my mission to share with others the same discoveries that transformed my health and my entire life.
Our minds are truly incredible—the placebo is proof of this. Each week, I take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. Then, I provide you with a powerful combination of practical and spiritual insights to help you master your mind, understand your emotions, and harness your energy. By doing this, you can heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Hello and Welcome
Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it. And I just love today's episode. You know, Each episode just has its own unique insight or twist or awareness. And that is so true with today's episode.
Navigating My Own Injury
And one of the things that today's episode makes me think of is just, even as I was navigating my own injury and working on healing myself, There was something that I reminded myself of, and it was this. I reminded myself when I did my mind programming, I reminded myself that it was kind of like a computer.
That if you start a computer up and you open a computer and it boots up and it, you know, it does this thing. It's like you're already sucked into that programming. You know, the computer's already started. It's, it's going with its normal programming, so to speak. And in my life, as it was going through my injury, rewiring. I remember thinking exactly that to myself, that I've got to really boot up my computer, so to speak, my mental computer in a different way so it starts operating in a different way.
The Analogy of the Computer
Now, part of the reason that analogy was so helpful to me was because it also reminded me not to get sucked into the old. And, because when you stop and think about it for a moment, when a person gets sucked into hurt, or upset, or hopelessness, or anger, or whatever it is, you know, when we get triggered by something, we get sucked in, and it's like we can't see out, if you will.
And, all of the time I'll see people who are stuck in that very place. You know, where I was. I mean, I'd been stuck in fear, and just all of these things. But, Once we get sucked in, it can be harder to see out. And that's something you're going to see in today's episode is, you know, we've been working with our beautiful volunteer, Tsenya, and part of what we're talking about is she's been really sucked into this feeling of hurt in relationships and feeling critical of self and embarrassed about self and not good enough.
Feeling Stuck
And it's this strong feeling that just has sucked her in that she feels and has felt like She's not valuable and that she's critical of self, so then she doesn't feel very good in relationships. And then she really wants a relationship, and it's affecting her health. So are there all of these things are just kind of piled on each other and when we feel that way of course We've got to be willing to change and I get it.
You know I absolutely Understand just as much as anybody going through it where if you're in a hurt place or stress or fear or really? feeling you know at Like you've hit bottom, like I've been there and I know what it takes and I know how it feels to be there and then also to be willing to really change, to put the effort forth to change, to be willing to see in a different way, to feel in a different way and to get out of that.
Being Willing to Change
And that's what I love about today's episode is that you really can see and witness the stuckness, but also you can witness that we don't have to be stuck. That when we start to see things from a bigger picture, that we can decide, okay, that we're willing to change. We're willing to see things in a new way, and we're really willing to follow through.
Because if we can just get ourselves to follow through, it becomes pivotal. And so, That's part of where we're going today, and it's following through on healing, but also following through that we can change relationships, that we can love who we are.
Before We Dive In with Senya
So, and by the way, you'll see that there are also some things that tend to keep people together. stuck. So that's where we're going. Now, before we dive in with Senya, I just want to remind you that this is actually part three of her session, meaning this, meaning when her and I had a session, it was over an hour long. And if I added in, you know, all of the insights, it would be two hour podcast episode.
And instead of doing that, I broke it down into chunks, just breaking it into three separate chunks with insights. And so on the In the first part of the session, we had talked about that feeling where she felt like she couldn't really have a relationship, like she was never really going to have one and feeling discouraged about that.
Recap of Previous Episodes
And so that's what we talked about in part one. And then part two, we started to talk about the feeling of being willing to love herself. And we also talked about the feeling where she felt like she really couldn't learn anything. And yet. She knows almost five languages. And so there was this feeling of, of not being willing to give herself credit and to start acknowledging self.
So that's what we talked about on part two. And then in today's segment. We're really going to go even deeper into the rest of it of understanding that self love and also some of those pieces that are keeping her from making that real change. And so if you missed episode 273 or 274, then you're definitely welcome to start there.
273, 274 and Today with 275, we are diving into this third part to really go deeper in understanding the feelings of transforming relationships and self love and also what can keep you stuck. And so that's where we're going as we dive in with our beautiful volunteer, Senya. Here we go.
Exploring Self-Worth and Relationships
Brandy: Okay. Now, by the way, how many people would say learning five languages would be challenging for them?
Senya: Um, I'm not sure.
Brandy: Do you think you know more languages than most people?
Senya: I don't feel like, I, I don't, I can't understand, like, how, I know it's valuable, logically, but it just feels like I'm, yeah, not valuing that.
Brandy: Okay, so if I ask you, when are you willing to start valuing yourself?
Senya: I would like to.
Brandy: Okay. Bingo. I'm gonna ask you to breathe. And if I ask you how much you would say you have, a lot of shame around relationships, what would you say
Senya: Yeah. A lot. Mm hmm.
Brandy: Zero to ten. How much?
Senya: I'm not sure, like, what it really is. Guilt. Shame. Something. Really awkward. Really, like, humiliated. Somehow to be seen as mean.
Brandy: Humiliated, to be seen as you.
Senya: Yeah. Uh huh.
Brandy: So, ask you to breathe. Now, if I ask you, why would you feel humiliated to be seen as you?
Senya: I don't know.
Brandy: Okay. So, ask you to breathe. And if I ask you to notice the part of you that's feeling, that's feeling, that's feeling, and feeling like everybody's laughing at you, what would you say?
Breaking Down the Fear of Judgment
Senya: Yeah. Mm hmm.
Brandy: Okay. Now, are they really? No. No. So, I have a question for you. Quick question. I want your advice for a second. If I feel like everybody's laughing at me, but everybody's not really laughing at me, but I feel like everybody's laughing at me, but everybody's not really laughing at me, what would you tell me I need to do?
Relax. Ha ha ha. I don’t know.
Recognizing Patterns in the Mind
Brandy: So this is what I want you to notice with clarity, okay? Notice with clarity. Notice how much you just started laughing in a big way right there, right? Now this is what I want you to notice. Can you see how you had a moment of clarity? How clear was that, when you started to notice that, when I switched that around, how clear was that?
Senya: That was getting pretty clear.
Brandy: It was getting pretty, pretty clear, so notice for a moment, these patterns in your mind that aren't even true, are hijacking your consciousness. You see it?
Senya: For sure.
Brandy: Right? So when you had that moment of clarity, you go, Oh my gosh, nobody's actually laughing. So if I told you, I feel like everybody's laughing at me, but nobody's actually laughing at me. But I feel humiliated to be myself, but nobody's actually laughing at me. What would you say to me?
Brandy: You really need to reprogram your mind because it's telling you things that aren't true, right? It's hijacking your consciousness. Does that make sense?
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: Great. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Now this is the thing, is I want you to notice that it keeps sucking you back in.
Sucking Back Into Negative Patterns
Brandy: It keeps sucking you back in, right? And that's why every so often I'm being playful in a ridiculous way or silly way because your mind is sucking you back into this story that somehow says you're not good enough. Does that make sense? So if I told you my mind kept sucking me into I'm not good enough, and by the way, how many people get sucked into fear in life?
Senya: A lot.
Brandy: A lot.
Brandy: How many people get sucked into anger?
Senya: A lot.
Brandy: A lot. Or upset, or hurt, or not good enough. That's the importance of rewiring the subconscious mind. Does that make sense?
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: Bingo. So I'm going to ask you to breathe.
Recognizing the Importance of Rewiring
All right. So let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I just love her. I love her self awareness. I love her self honesty. I love her sense of humor. She's just beautiful. And when we stop and think about it for a moment, notice that her mind is telling her things. They aren't even true and it's hijacking her mind and that's what I meant by in the beginning when I mentioned like a computer booting up and once you're like in that programming you can get very sucked in and all of the time I see people who are sucked into emotions that don't make logical sense.
Moving Toward Healing
I mean, you've probably heard before where somebody says something like, you know, I feel guilty or I feel so bad and I know I shouldn't feel bad, but I do those type of feelings or sometimes where people feel humiliated or like they're being criticized or attacked and they feel that way. But it's not really happening. And part of what's tricky about those emotions is when people feel that way, then they can respond in that way, which then could attract the problem instead.
And you'll see what I mean coming up because sometimes what can happen is people may feel. Like, they need to protect themselves, so then they'll feel like they need to be strong and, and, and then they come off as intimidating and then it, like the cycle, you'll see what I mean as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer, Senya.
That's where we're going. Here we go.
Reframing Thoughts
Brandy: Bingo. And I'm going to ask you to picture yourself. Moving forward, if you knew that nobody was laughing at you and that everybody was just going to love you, if you knew that, if you knew that, that nobody's laughing at you, that everybody's actually really going to love you and that you really can have the relationship that you want, if you knew that, how would you feel right now?
Brandy: How would you feel if you knew you could do this?
Senya: I'm afraid that I intimidate people also.
Brandy: Okay, are you intimidating me right now? Should I be intimidated? Is that what you're, are you threatening me?
Senya: No.
Brandy: No.
Senya: It's just how I see people, often that they pull back.
Brandy: Hey, sweetie, I'm not intimidated. We're good. Okay, so I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Now, by the way, if people are intimidated by me, could I dial in my people skills? To then change that I've been trying to stay confident, but yeah, Could I don't make this about you? This is about me.
The Power of Change
Brandy: Okay, now why did I do that? Why did I do that? Remember? I want you stuck out I want you a bit out of your own mind. Okay, because notice I want you to have some more clarity for a moment. If I told you I feel like people are intimidated by me, could I change something in my peopling skills? To then connect with people in another way.
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: Now are there people who, by the way, who walk around who want to intimidate others?
Senya: Probably.
Brandy: Probably? So if I, if I wanted to walk around and intimidate people, could I maybe do that?
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: Okay, so if I'm walking around and I'm intimidating people, could I then do something with my energy, with my, with, with myself that I can then change that. Could it, is that changeable?
Senya: Mm hmm. Yeah.
Brandy: So everything's changeable, right?
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. So this is what I want you to notice. If I ask you to notice a level of pain in your neck and shoulder, what's your level?
Senya: It's better. I don't feel it.
Brandy: Notice how you're trying to feel it. You're like, wait a second.
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: You're trying every which way to try to feel it.
Senya: It's not there.
Brandy: Notice you're like doing all these contortions to try to feel it.
Senya: Yeah. I have something in my stomach, but.
Brandy: Okay. And what's the level in your stomach?
Senya: Like four.
Brandy: Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe.
Reframing Negative Beliefs
Brandy: Bingo. And I want you to notice the feeling of fear in your stomach. Like fear of changing. Can you see that? And fear of people. Can you see that?
Senya: Yeah.
Brandy: I have a question. Bingo. If somebody's afraid of dogs, they're terrified of dogs, terrified of dogs, could they overcome that fear? Okay. Now, by the way, how do you feel about dogs?
Senya: I love dogs.
Brandy: And are there people who are afraid of dogs? And what would you say to those people?
Senya: That dogs are not scary.
Brandy: Exactly. So now if I said to you, people aren't scary, but you're really going to need to overcome this fear, and embrace the change, because people aren't scary at all. Now by the way, if I go up to a dog, and I approach it really, really fast, or if I look mean at it, and I approach it really fast, could I scare the dog?
Brandy: Could it react? So there's probably a certain way that I need to interact with dogs. To then feel the love and connection, right? So now it's impossible for me to change this. It's just not possible. It's not doable. I can't. It's never going to change. Or is it possible? It's possible.
Time and Patience for Change
All right, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, again, I just love her. I just love her. What a beautiful, beautiful being. And notice for a moment what she said. She doesn't have time. So think about this for a moment, how much pressure there is to hurry up and change and hurry up and I don't have time and I don't have time.
Does that help a person change? Or does that keep a person from changing? And of course, the latter is true. It makes it hard. You know, even if using the same example, if we use the example towards a child learning the alphabet, if somebody comes and says, learn the alphabet, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, go, what's going to happen?
The child is going to feel frustrated, flustered, and have a much harder time. Now that has to do with the alphabet, but think about emotions. If somebody says, Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry. When you stop and think about it, if you say, hurry, hurry, hurry, what emotion do you have? Stressed out, flustered, upset, impossible, can't do it.
Final Thoughts
It becomes harder to learn and harder to change. Not only that, but when you stop and think about it for a moment, there's a part of her, as you can see, she's wanting to change her relationships and her connection with people and also her health. And like, there's all of these things. She wants to change simultaneously, and of course, it's not just her. I see it all of the time, where people want to change everything all at once, and don't get me wrong. I mean, I went through my own injury, where my entire life fell apart, and I had to start acknowledging myself. So I get it. I've been there. I've done that. I've lived it.
And to go from being fit and in martial arts and Hall of Fame and all of these things from, you know, being physically fit and running and always, I had always been very physically active and physically fit. To go from doing all of these sports and working out, To then being injured for many, many, many years and then needing to acknowledge myself for just taking steps and taking, you know, 15 steps with no cane or walker or wheelchair, you know, and at first, of course, I was critical and like, what do you like, but I had to really just be willing to be where I was and start loving myself as I was, where I was and start being encouraging to self not critical of self.
The Power of Self-Love and Change
And so that's a powerful insight. It takes a moment to just be willing to say Okay, I'm going to love yourself and and so and really be genuine about that. And so if you are there and you're finding yourself impatient or just wanting change, remember that you don't need to change everything at once. It's not more helpful to change everything at once.
Thank You for Listening
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. Share this episode with someone you love, and remember: You are capable of incredible change, and every step you take toward loving yourself brings you closer to healing your life.
