277: The Hidden Mind Loops That Sabotage Healing — (And What It Takes to Change Them)

Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life

My name is Brandi Gilmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it's become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I'll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.

Let's begin.

Introduction to Today's Episode

Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it. And you're going to absolutely love. Today's volunteer. She's just wise and her heart and just, she just has really great self-awareness and the insights though that come from today's episode are also really profound.

You know, you'll be able to see What happens when, you know, the subconscious mind is just stuck in a loop, if you will, because so often that's the very thing that happens is that you get miswired mind programming in your subconscious mind. That's holding you back from the very things that you're wanting in life and even making life hard and challenging and making it feel like a struggle.

And that's part of what's been going on with our beautiful volunteer. And by the way, something else you'll notice. Is that as we step in, you'll notice there's this natural feeling of just wanting to respect her so much just because of the way she presents herself, the way she's honest and aware and acknowledging it.

She just. You, you just have this feeling of just respecting her in such a beautiful way. And what you'll also notice is that there's a part of her who's felt like she doesn't have respect from others. And like she's had to struggle with that or battle with that or fight for it in her life. And so it's like you'll see how the mixed emotions can show up.

The Struggles with Self-Criticism

But what you'll also notice is that there's a part of her who's really hard on herself as well. And that's part of what's fueling the problem. And so it's a little tricky, but just the awarenesses from it are so profound. And so that's where we're going. And that's actually where we're going to be jumping in is you'll notice that as we're jumping in, she's actually wanting to beat herself up and feel bad a bit.

And that's what's going to need to shift. As we step back in. And so that said, before we do step in, bigger picture is that our volunteer, her name is Corrine and I worked with her for about 50 minutes on a session. And of course, if I put that into one podcast, it ended up two hours with all the insights and whatnot, or an hour and a half and whatnot.

So I went ahead and broke it into two pieces. Now we listened to the first half of the session. Last week, and as you'll recall, part of what we were talking about was that she felt so stuck that she had been told that she was impossible to change, that she wasn't going to get results, that she was really difficult.

And that's actually how we started the session. So if you recall, if you listened to that last episode. The first thing she said is, she said, I just want to give you a little bit of advice or insight. And she said, just so you know, you're probably not going to be able to help me. I mean, that was pretty much the first thing she said, and it was beautiful because as soon as we stepped in, she started seeing insights.

And that's what I love is that when you go from feeling in a place where you feel like There's nothing and nobody can help you to realizing that you can help you. You know, that the more you really understand your mind, the more you can do it, it's just a profound shift. And so I loved just watching that unfold.

The Past Mindset and Acknowledging Guilt

And so that's where we started was stepping into that. She said, you're not going to be able to help me. And, and that feeling of feeling stuck. But then started to see the logic behind what her mind was doing. And, you'll recall one thing that came up from last episode is that she had a, it linked in her mind that if she was happy, that anytime she was, that bad things always happened.

Like something, some type of problem always happened. And so, she's struggled trying to feel happy. She's been stuck in these heavy, heavy feelings. for her whole life pretty much and so she's been stuck and wanting to really break free and so What I love from the last episode is she really started to see that mixed mind programming and that miswired mind programming that was keeping her stuck And so I love that and just brilliant brilliant self-awareness now as we dive into today's episode.

What you'll notice is that when we left off, she was talking about guilt towards her children about feeling that she messed them up and they weren't perfect and how, you know, and all of the guilt and it was her fault.

And yet, when we stop and look at it, she has four children, two of which are really, really turned out as amazing beings and two of which are struggling a lot in life. And so we were talking about that; the awareness that as much as she'd like to be the one to really shape her children, that ultimately even at a young age, we all make that decision.

We all, even though we don't realize it, we all kind of shape that decision. We all become, you know, from that who we become. And what I mean by that is If you recall in the last episode, one of the examples that I used is that I had worked with twins, and their father went to prison when they were very young, and one ended up growing up and going to prison, and the other one ended up growing up and becoming an officer.

And they both said, well, because my dad was the way he was, then I had no choice. One said, I had no choice to become an officer and do the right thing. And the other one said, I had no choice, but, you know, but to follow my, my dad's footsteps. And so they became completely opposite and it was such a really perfect example of the awareness that even when we don't realize as children that we're shaping our lives, we are.

Breaking Free from Blame

The reason that can be really powerful is this, is that if we spend our entire lives blaming our parents for something and saying, well, it's my parents' fault, it's my parents' fault, but they're blaming, if we're blaming our parents, Then we never get our power back. But if we can say, okay, I'm the one that has the ability to change this and we own the ability to change it, not beat ourselves up, but change it, then that's when we take control of our lives and can really transform our health, our happiness, our lives in a most beautiful way.

So just kind of taking that awareness in because I've seen so often where people feel stuck because they are blaming their parents because that's how it feels. It feels like it, it feels, it can absolutely feel like, Oh, but it's your parents' fault because of this, because of this.

And when you stop and think about it, of course, their parents did that to them, or did that to them, and then their parents, and then their parents, and so where does the blame stop? Oh, well, what about the generation before, and then the generation before, and then the generation before? It's like, it's like the awareness that if we're really gonna break free, we have to really be willing to not blame anybody.

But instead to step into empowerment and also be kind towards ourselves. So not blaming anybody even means not blaming yourself, but instead moving everything forward to genuinely heal and transform. And so, that's where we're going as we step in with beautiful Corrine is exactly that, is taking in the awareness that she doesn't need to beat herself up regarding her children anymore and instead the awareness that they can, they have the power to become who they want to become.

They're all grown adults and they have that power. And the best thing that she could do is, of course, start lifting herself and move forward. So that's where we're going as we step back in with beautiful Corrine and where we're going specifically as I asked her, you know, thinking about that analogy or that example of the officer.

Self-Worth and the Power to Change

The brother who went to prison, and the fact that they had become two very, very different people, I asked her, what did she take from that? What was her takeaway in the awareness that even as children, we're still interpreting what everything means, and ultimately, it can shape our lives. And of course, when we're ready to change it.

It becomes a life-changing gift. And so, that's where we're going as we step back in with Beautiful Corrine. Here we go.

Shifting to Self-Kindness

So what did you take from that? Everybody has their own journey. Everybody has their own perception. Everybody can choose what path they, they wish to go on regardless of the situation and you can view things very, very differently and that's up to the person themselves. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Your parents, as much as they want to control you, or wanted to, couldn't decide that.

And I've actually seen it before, literally, where I worked with a set of twins. And one twin said, one twin, basically one twin ended up in jail, and the other one ended up in law enforcement. And it was because their dad was in and out of prison, and this, that, the other. And one of them said, I had no choice but to be like my dad, it's my dad's fault.

The other one said, I saw what my dad went through, and I never wanted to be like that. And became in law enforcement. So you want to talk about twins going the opposite side of the coin. When you stop and think about it, I mean, there couldn't have been a bigger difference. But each took a different meaning from the same exact situation.

But what about just the plain and simple that it should never have happened? Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe.

Letting Go of Guilt

All right, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I just love her. I love her heart. I love her self-awareness. She's beautiful and brilliant, but she wants to continue to beat herself up. And that, of course, is something She'll want to change. But notice for a moment, she says, but what if it never should have never happened?

But what if, you know, it's like this feeling of really continuing to be hard on herself. And what we're talking about here is, if you recall from the last session where we left off, was we had been talking about the awareness that she realized how much she was hard on her kids in a way of cutting them down, but not in an effort to be mean.

But because that's the way that she was raised, it's like a humor, if you will, in a household where some people are raised in a way where it's like cool to embarrass each other, or embarrass or cut each other down, and that's the way that she was raised, and so that's also The way that she raised her children was with that same awareness, you know, and as she mentioned, she said, she said, you know, Oh, hey, you're fat to her son or whatnot, you know, these, these things that would cut people down, but it wasn't an intent to be mean.

It's just. How she was raised and so the thing of it is is either she could continue to beat herself up about it or She could just move it forward and that's ultimately what you want to do with anything. You want to move forward, you know when you stop and think about it for a moment Even in my own case in my life the very injury that I felt took away my entire life Ended up giving me more life than I ever thought was possible.