Brandy: [00:00:00] Welcome to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themself of physical pain using only their mind, and then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use. To master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health yourself and your life.
Let’s begin.[00:01:00]
Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it and I just love so many things about today’s episode, just the insights, the awareness. I love that our beautiful volunteer was able to take her pain that started at about a level six, seven, and able to shift it down to about a level three so she could see.
A shift, and I love that when people can see the mind body connection and there were some really powerful insights, and so that’s where we’re going now. Also diving in. Another thing that I really, really love is our beautiful volunteer. Her name is Caroline, and you’re absolutely going to love her. She just [00:02:00] has this sweetness and authenticity that’s really just wonderful.
It just makes you want to connect with her, and it’s just a sweet, beautiful, beautiful being. Now, by the way. I just want to speak to this for a moment because all of the time you’ll hear me connect with some volunteer and I would say two things are true, and I recently spoke to this also, but two things are true.
First and foremost, we get the best volunteers. We really just do. That’s one thing. Now, the second thing is this is I really, you’ll hear me all the time say, I just love them, and this is what it reminds me of. By the way, when I was like 19, 20 years old, I went on a whitewater rafting trip down the river with a bunch of friends and a friends mother, and it was just like a friends and family.
It was just a really sweet gathering. Now, now where we were at this part where we were just listening to music, relaxing, just enjoying the water, [00:03:00] and. We were as we were listening to music, each song that came on the radio, the radio at the time we were listening to, but each song that came on, I kept just saying, oh my gosh, I love this song.
Oh my gosh, I love this song. Oh, I love this song. It was because it just felt like they were playing one amazing song after another, after another. And I just loved it. And by the way, if you’re a music lover, then, you know what I mean? That feeling where it’s just like, it feels like one song after another that comes on that you just love.
And so it’s silly or playful or whatnot. Either way. My point being is that every time we get an amazing new volunteer, I feel that same feeling. Like, oh my gosh, you’re gonna love this one. And oh, I love this one. And oh, that one. Like, they’re just really sweet, amazing, wonderful beings. And so that’s the feeling that I have.
And so if I, if you notice, I’m always gushing over this volunteer and then this volunteer, it’s because. That’s how I feel is [00:04:00] just we get the most wonderful, heartfelt, kind, beautiful people, and I just really love that, and so I love that. I also really gush about the insights because I know what it feels like to feel stuck and injured and just want to understand how to heal.
And as you’ll see even in today’s episode, they’re counterintuitive. So often there is something that is hidden and counterintuitive that makes you feel stuck. Then of course, that’s where we’re going as we step in with our beautiful volunteer. Caroline, here we go.
Hi. Hi. It’s wonderful to connect with you. How’s your day going?
Karoline: Good. I’ve been really excited to connect with you. I love that. Yeah. So I’m super grateful for you to have me on here. It’s just Thank you so much. Absolutely.
Brandy: I look forward [00:05:00] to it. Thank you. Thank you. And, uh, how, what can I help you with today?
Beautiful.
Karoline: Um, yeah, I have three main health issues. I have a lot of stomach pain in my upper stomach especially, so it’s hard to drink and eat enough, and also like stand and walk and everything. Um, so eight years ago it started and one year after I had like surgery for, uh, an artery in the upper stomach were compressed.
Uh, so it got a little bit better, but like far from good. And after the surgery. Uh, my neck started getting worse, like, uh, and jaw pain and head pain.
Brandy: Okay.
Karoline: Um, like yeah, headaches and also chronically, um, I was getting chronically fatigued as well. Okay. [00:06:00] Um, all right. Yeah. You ready to dive in? Yes. Really? Can I just add one more thing?
Okay. Go ahead. Go ahead. No, it was just, um, this neck and thing, uh, just a couple of months ago. It also got into like, I got a diss, vertigo started. Okay. So kind of, I feel like it snowballed like on the right side. Yeah. I just want to add that.
Brandy: Okay. Good to know.
Karoline: Yeah.
Brandy: Uh, and that’s exactly what I was about to ask is I was going to ask you.
So, uh, as far as your neck pain right now, what’s your current level?
Karoline: Um. Like when I’m sitting like straight like this, it’s non-existent. Okay. I would say like zero. Yeah. Okay. So it’s more like, yeah, it’s good when I’m just sitting like this.
Brandy: Okay. And when you turn your head, what’s your level?
Karoline: Right now? It’s, [00:07:00] uh, actually Okay. Um, it gets worse when I walk and, yeah. Okay.
Brandy: And as far as your jaw pain right now,
Karoline: um, that’s also okay right now. Okay. They usually get triggered together? Yeah.
Brandy: Okay. And, um, bingo. Okay. And as far as your upper stomach, what’s your level in your upper stomach right now?
Karoline: I would say,
Brandy: um, six.
That’s exactly what I would’ve said about a six. Okay. And as far as, uh, headache, when was the last headache you had? Um,
Karoline: I think it’s a bit ago since I had like a real big head headache. Okay. But, uh, I think, um, yeah, I guess I’m just used to having it kind of coming a little bit when I get exhausted, so I [00:08:00] Okay.
Brandy: Don’t remember exactly. Okay. I understand. I understand. So, uh, so gimme just one second. Gimme one second. Um, bingo.
Okay. So, um, so when I step into your energy, there is,
there’s a lot of, of upset and it feels, I’m trying to figure out who it is. Uh, do you have sisters?
Karoline: Yes.
Brandy: Okay. I do.
Karoline: I have a, a big, big sister and two,
Brandy: uh, step sisters. Okay. And can you also, can you give me your mom’s initial H And can you give me each of your sister’s initials?
Karoline: My big sister M and then, uh, E and then S
Brandy: Bingo.[00:09:00]
Mm. It’s not that, um, there is a female. Bingo. Gimme one second. It feels like it. Are you married?
Karoline: No.
Brandy: Okay. And are you in a relationship? No. Okay. And, uh, can you give me your ex’s initial please?
Karoline: Um, my X was, yeah, M or the last guy I dated, uh, four years ago. L.
Brandy: Okay, now, um, all right, so gimme one second that.
Oh, I have a stepmother. Bingo. Can you gimme her initial please? Uh, k. Bingo. Thank you. That’s who I’m looking for. Okay, thank you. Oh, okay. So how is that relationship, by the way? [00:10:00]
Karoline: It’s not, uh, great. It’s like, uh, superficially good, but, uh, yeah, that’s been a hard relationship. Uh, bingo, actually.
Brandy: Okay. And, uh, bingo.
And if I ask you bingo, if I ask you why you’re so upset with her, why would you say that is?
Karoline: Uh, I feel like when I’m around her, I’m. I get so easily triggered when she, I feel like she watches me like a hawk. Like if I’m doing things, for example, if I’m at their home, uh, and doing things in the kitchen, making me myself food, she’s like watching and want to want to like say something like, no, do that instead, don’t use this.
[00:11:00] And she’s been doing that since, yeah, since my father and her were together, like when I was 10 years old. Okay. Um,
Brandy: bingo. And can you gimme her initial please? K Bingo. Exactly. Gimme one second. Bingo. Okay. And if I ask you how much you feel unloved with her in the picture, what would you say?
Karoline: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I can feel that.
Yeah.
Brandy: Zero to 10. Mm
Karoline: Um,
maybe like a six and a half.
Brandy: Okay. And, um, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe Bingo. Okay. And, um, if I ask you how much you feel like you got replaced, what would you say [00:12:00] by her?
Karoline: Bingo. I was replaced by her.
Brandy: Yeah. There’s a feeling, um, let me give it a different word. Um, like a feeling of feeling like you got moved out of the way.
Uh, like she came in and you got pushed aside. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Karoline: It makes sense with my, uh, yeah. Dad’s side. Of the family. Um, she had the daughter and then they had together. Yeah, my half brother. And so my sister and I were kind of like left out a bit. She was running the show there and she wanted to include her kids more in holidays and stuff and leaving us.
So that’s been a big feeling I had. Yeah. That and my father didn’t like, uh, [00:13:00] think of these things. He was just like working, making money and that stuff. And she was taking care of like the other stuff in the family, so. Okay.
Brandy: And if I ask you, have you ever had a conversation with your dad and told him that you’d like to be more included?
Karoline: Um.
I’m not sure if I even said it like that directly to my dad. I think I, I think I mentioned it before and not long ago, I had, I had a conversation with him about my stepmother, but I think, uh,
I’m not really sure if I said ex those exact words actually. Okay.
Brandy: So you would like your stepmother a lot [00:14:00] better if you felt more included, right?
Karoline: I think so, yeah. Okay. And, uh hmm.
Brandy: And if I ask you how much a lot of your emotions towards her have been from hurt and feeling overreactive because of feeling hurt.
Karoline: Yeah. That might be when you say it. Yeah. Okay. Okay.
Brandy: So now, by the way, have you ever told her that you wanted to be more included?
Karoline: Mm,
no, I don’t think so. Okay. I don’t
Brandy: think I have. Uh, so if you think about it, have you ever complained to your dad about your stepmother?
Karoline: Yeah, I said some [00:15:00] things to be like, open it up a little bit, a few months ago.
Brandy: Okay. Now, the thing of it is, is that without communicating what you’re really wanting mm-hmm. When you’re reactive about things and then hurt, then it just makes it look like you are what, over reactive? Because Yeah. Then the hurt isn’t always so clear.
Does that make sense?
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah. Okay. It makes sense. I, yeah, because I think, I just thought that the issue was that I feel like she, cri is criticizing me, but maybe that’s just, I take it more to heart because I’m hurt
Brandy: from before. Yeah. Or that, uh, yeah. Notice the part of you that mentioned [00:16:00] that you feel easily triggered around her, you can see that, right?
Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Okay. Mm-hmm. So, um, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
All right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, again, I just love her. I love her self-awareness. I love her heart. You know, as soon as I mentioned her stepmother, she noticed, she said, she’s got a lot of triggers. So she noticed that come up. Now, what you also notice is that she hasn’t really asked for what it is that she’s wanted.
And so, so often people can feel triggered or upset, and they’re not really communicating what it is that they’re wanting and that can keep them stuck. And so I just want to bring this to the surface because that can be a place [00:17:00] where people can get stuck. Now there is more to this regarding perspective and mind programming and awareness at a deeper level.
And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer. Caroline, here we go.
So I want you to notice for a moment that maybe you are not unloved or less loved, but the more reactive you are, the more you make it harder to love, and the more you appear to be the problem, when really there’s something else going on at a deeper level. Does that make sense?
Karoline: Yeah, it does.
Brandy: Okay. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe Bingo.
Now this is the thing, if I ask you honestly how much you felt left out from your [00:18:00] big sister growing up, also even at a younger age, what would you say? Um, I can say this in a different way, and it’s like this. You ready? Yeah. Yeah. If I ask you, can you see the pattern of feeling left out or unloved? Can you see that?
Not just with your stepmom, but can you see how that’s shown up in other areas?
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah.
Brandy: Okay. Yeah. Relationships. Can you see that?
Karoline: Yes. Yeah. I often, yeah. Been feeling left out.
Brandy: Okay. Okay. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and, um, bingo. And I’m gonna ask you to breathe. I’m gonna ask you what if love is easy.
Yeah, that would be great. Great. And, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.[00:19:00]
Bingo. Gimme one second.
Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
I want you to notice the part of you who feels or has felt like she’s criticizing you. Can you see that?
Karoline: Uh, my stepmother? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Mm.
Brandy: Yeah. I see it. Okay. So if I ask you to notice the part of you who’s felt like she’s like watching you, uh, and it bothers you zero to 10, how much can you find it?
Karoline: Uh, yeah, like, uh, I guess nine or 10. Okay. I think.
Brandy: And why do you think she’s watching you?
Karoline: Um, she wants to do things in her, her way. [00:20:00] Okay. Um, and then maybe sometimes I think, I don’t know if, uh. She has respect for me always, but I think it feels like mostly she just wants to do things in her own way. I know she does it with others too, so I, yeah.
Okay.
Brandy: And, uh, bingo. And does she do that with your dad? Yeah. And does he take it as being criticized?
Karoline: Probably not that, not that much I think. No. Okay.
Brandy: And do you take it as being criticized? Yeah. Yeah. And disrespected? Yeah, it feels like that. Okay. So why, why are [00:21:00] you taking it? So personally,
Karoline: I, I don’t, I know I don’t need to.
Okay,
Brandy: great, great, great. So I’m gonna ask you to. Okay, great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe the level in your stomach, zero to 10. What’s the level in your stomach?
Karoline: Um,
Brandy: I
Karoline: think it’s a
Brandy: seven. Okay. Ish? About a seven ish. Okay.
Karoline: Yeah.
Brandy: Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe Bingo. And if I ask you to notice, also, I’m gonna ask you to close your eyes and don’t think bingo. And if I ask you zero to 10, how much you can find the feeling of feeling like you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing.
Karoline: Yeah. 10 all the time.
Brandy: 10 all the time,
Karoline: right. So I, I feel like that I also, yeah, I feel like I have like an inner conversation with myself a [00:22:00] lot. Like I need to defend myself and then I’m like catching myself. Like, you don’t need to defend yourself right now or. Okay.
Brandy: Yeah. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and notice that feeling of feeling like you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Like, notice that feeling. How silly is it that you have that feeling? Yeah. How silly is it that you have that feeling like that you’re doing something that you shouldn’t be doing? Yeah. Now gimme one second. Bingo. Bingo. Now, if I ask you if there’s also a mischievous part of you that kind of likes to do things that you feel like you shouldn’t be doing, what would you say?
Karoline: Um, oh, I, I don’t know. Um, but yeah, I’m smiling when I said it, but, um, and you are, [00:23:00] you’re, as soon as I said that you had a big smile.
Uh, like five comes up, but I, I don’t know. Yeah. I guess it’s a part of me, but Yeah. Wants, wants to push against
Brandy: it. Bingo. Okay. So to push against it, so if I ask you how much you have the antagonist part that likes to rebel or be mischievous and whatnot, zero to 10, what would you say?
Karoline: Um, maybe,
uh, it feels like maybe four or five, just like,
Brandy: okay. So I would’ve said about a level eight, but we’ll go with your four or five. Okay. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I’m gonna ask you to breathe now, that, that, that, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to notice the part of you [00:24:00] who likes to push against authority and has fun doing that.
Yeah. Yep. Yep. Yeah. Hmm. Okay. So bingo. If I ask you honestly how much you like to push your stepmother’s buttons, what would you say?
Karoline: Oh, I didn’t really think I was doing it that much, but I guess it’s, yeah, maybe six. I, I don’t know. I need to think about what I’m doing to do that, but, okay.
Brandy: All right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, I just absolutely adore her and in this moment when I asked her if there was a part of her who had this feeling of basically like rebelliousness against authority or wanting to get authority back or whatnot, she smiled. She had the biggest smile [00:25:00] on her face, and I love that she noticed that about herself.
So she said, you know, I smiled really big, so I guess something must be there. And I just love her self-awareness around it herself, honesty, and just the, the insight from it where she can really see that in herself and smile and, and just notice that. So I love that awareness. Now, I also want to point out, because we’re going to go even deeper as we step back in, you’ll notice that we go even more towards the deeper programming that is under the feeling of.
Even rebelliousness against authority, et cetera, because there’s there, what you’ll notice as we start, as we continue is there is some defensiveness, there’s also some feelings of feeling picked on, et cetera. And so that’s where we’re going. Now, the part that I want to highlight is this, is that all of the time you hear me mention that negative things can get linked up to positive emotions.
[00:26:00] So for example, when I mentioned like the rebelliousness type of, you know, wanting to get authority back or whatnot, she smiled. So it was a positive feeling for her, which can create a problem. And a lot of people are surprised by that. Why would rebelliousness against authority cause a problem? It seems very counterintuitive, but that rebelliousness against authority.
There’s a, it’s a overall. It’s a negative energy. Now, by the way, some people listening to this will go, well, wait a second. Rebelliousness against authority. That’s cool, or that’s strong, or that’s amazing. But other people will go rebelliousness against authority. Okay? You wouldn’t want that. That’s a negative emotion.
That’s pain. That’s, that’s reactiveness, that’s hurt. That’s feeling restricted. That’s so there’s all the other emotions that are connected to it too. And so there’s a [00:27:00] deeper feeling, but that’s my point, is that all the time I see people who link it up to a positive, like a strength. Like a, a feeling of feeling cool.
And it gets linked up. Now, by the way, for a lot of people, they might be perplexed that this could actually affect your health. But if you look in the medical journal, so I mention all the time, you know, having researched in the medical journal, why? Because I love that you can see it. You can see the before and after.
And that to me is powerful because I know going through my injury to be able to see the power of the mind would’ve been really helpful and profound and motivating in so many things. And so in that medical journal, which you can find the link in the show notes, but you can see a before and after of a person that I worked with in the medical journal.
It’s participant number six, and you can see if you read it, one of the links that were in his mind was also this [00:28:00] feeling of rebelliousness against authority. And of course he had different emotions, et cetera. It wasn’t exactly the same as our beautiful volunteer today. But my point is just simply that these emotions.
Impact a person. And that’s part of the reason that it can be so tricky is because that’s another situation where a negative emotion can get linked up to a positive and then it can stay very stuck. Now again, there are other links in this case where we’re going. There are other feelings that are linked up at a deeper level, but I just wanted to point that out because that negative being linked to a positive can happen in the subconscious mind.
And that is something we’ve been talking about on past episodes. Now, of course, in this case, we’re going even deeper because there are other links that are connected to it as well. And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer. Caroline, here we go.[00:29:00]
If I ask you, growing up, did you like to upset her or be the antagonist.
Karoline: No, I actually would say that I wanted to please her.
Brandy: Mm-hmm.
Karoline: Okay. Yeah, I felt like, like doing the right things and, okay,
Brandy: so let’s put it this
Karoline: way. Yeah.
Brandy: Bingo. If I ask you, do you think your mom would like if you liked her? Mm.
Karoline: Oh, that’s difficult. Is it D think she would? Yes or no? Yes or no? Yeah. It’s not difficult. Yes or no. I, I mean, yeah, I think she would, but also maybe a part, partly no, for some reason just comes up. Okay.
Brandy: So if I ask you how much you feel like not getting along with your stepmom is also a loyalty to your mom, what would you say?
Karoline: Oh,
Brandy: yeah. What if you got [00:30:00] along amazingly well with your stepmom, like you and your stepmom get along really, really
Karoline: well? Oh. Now I can, yeah. I can feel I just, the memory came up. Yeah. When I was younger and I was shopping with my stepmother and Kendall had a feeling that she feel felt left out that I was enjoying things that I wasn’t necessarily doing with her.
Always because, yeah. Yeah. So, okay. Hmm.
Brandy: Interesting. Bingo. Okay, so bingo. So notice bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So if I ask you then how, like, let’s say you and your stepmom are getting along at a level 10, you’re great and amazing. How would you like that? Yeah, I, I would love that. And picture, but yeah.
Great. And how would you feel, how guilty would you feel towards your mom if that was the case? [00:31:00]
Karoline: Yeah, A part of me would be like, uh, feel guilty, like
Brandy: zero to 10, seven guilty. Eight, seven. Eight, seven.
Karoline: Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Brandy: Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe
bingo. And I want you to notice the part of you that also likes your stepmom. Can you see that? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So bingo. Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So notice for a moment there’s a part of you and I agree, like I love that you had that awareness of the childhood memory of feeling guilty for then going with your stepmom and having a good time towards your mom.
Bingo. Okay? Mm-hmm. So, um, very, very much. Um, so, so what if the best way to make sure your mom doesn’t feel left out is just to make [00:32:00] sure she feels loved?
Karoline: Yeah.
Brandy: Makes sense. Like you don’t have to not have a relationship with your mom and with your stepmom and your dad to make her feel included. Instead, you just need to make sure that you have a great relationship with her. Right? Yeah. Okay. So imagine, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and watch this. Let’s say your mom has a really great relationship with your sister, but not with you.
How would that feel to you? Mm,
Karoline: yeah, it would be, it would feel, yeah, a bit sad, maybe a or okay. Like really good that she has a good, no, it would feel good, but sad for her and minds
Brandy: relationship. Okay. I think So. Let’s say that she has a really, really great relationship with you and [00:33:00] she also has a really great relationship with your sister.
Yeah. Could that be okay? Yeah. Would it bother you if she has a really great relationship with both of you guys? No. Okay. So if you have a really great relationship with your mom and you have one with your dad and your stepmom too, that can be okay, right? Yeah. Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So you mean there is a way to move forward through this where you can love both of them and it can be safe to do so, correct? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. Gimme one second.
And I want you to notice the part of you who feels like so criticized by your stepmom, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You, if I ask you, you can see that, right? [00:34:00] Yeah. Do you really need to give that so much energy?
Karoline: No.
Brandy: She’s particular about things. Okay. Right. So, so, okay, so, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Gimme one second.
Bingo. Okay. Can you see the part of you who would love to kick her out of the picture? Yeah.
Karoline: Mm-hmm.
Brandy: So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and if I ask you zero to 10, how much?
Karoline: Yeah, I guess sometimes like an 8, 8,
Brandy: 9, 10, 12, somewhere in there. Okay. Yeah. So imagine if you’re in a relationship and the kids wanna break you up from somebody you’re in a [00:35:00] relationship with, who you love. Yeah. Now how long have they been together for?
Karoline: Uh,
Brandy: for
Karoline: 23
Brandy: years. Okay. So if I ask you if you’re with somebody for 23 years and somebody else is trying to break up your relationship mm-hmm. Yeah. That’s not nice.
Karoline: Mm-hmm.
Brandy: Now I have a question. How badly does she treat your dad?
Karoline: No, not bad. She’s just, she’s good at criticizing and it, that’s also a part of that. Yeah.
Brandy: So, but wait a second. Affects me. And if I ask you, how good does she treat your dad?
Karoline: Uh, yeah. Good. Good. Okay. Yeah.
Brandy: So imagine if I said there’s somebody who’s, my dad’s married for 20 something years. [00:36:00] And she treats him good, but I really wanna break up their relationship.
Yeah. No, I don’t want that. Like, I mean, there might be an integrity issue there,
Karoline: right? Probably my subconscious want that. Okay. But I, so I’m gonna, I want to, don’t want to break up.
Brandy: I
Karoline: get it. For, for me, for, no, I mean, for him, I want him to be happy. Okay.
Brandy: Of course. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Mm-hmm. So I’m gonna ask you to close your eyes, and I get, when you think about it, you go, of course you want him to be happy, but also when you’re triggered and upset, you just want her to do what?
Go away. Especially if she felt like she came into the family and then replaced you with her kids and their kid together and, and whatnot, and now you feel replaced and left out of, of course you would. There, there can be a, an emotional reaction to want her outta the picture. Right. I get it. Okay, I understand.
So I’m gonna [00:37:00] ask you to breathe. Don’t judge it. Don’t judge it. Just observe your emotions. Don’t judge emotions. Observe them and transform them. Don’t judge, don’t criticize. Just observe and transform. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
All right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I love her heart. I love her self-awareness. And notice for a moment this feeling that she’s experiencing isn’t an emotion she put here on purpose. And if you stop and think about it for a moment, so many young children feel this way and have felt this way, and then when they grow up, that feeling remains where it just is.
That feeling of, you know, feeling replaced and then feeling hurt and then feeling unloved because you can just see how much. [00:38:00] She absolutely loves her father so much. It’s just really very, very sweet. And so the thing you want to keep in mind is that if you are experiencing any emotions like this to make sure not to judge yourself, nobody puts these emotions there on purpose.
And they come from feelings of hurt or feeling unloved, just like in this case. And I have to say, I really just love. Her heart. I love how much she loves her father. It is so sweet, and I just love how much she loves her father. It is so sweet. It just, her heart is so big, and so there’s also, of course, that feeling.
I don’t want her to judge herself or criticize herself. And so taking that awareness in for yourself to make sure that if you find things in your subconscious mind that you won’t want to feel bad or criticize or judge yourself either. You know, a lot of times you can find things that you didn’t necessarily put there.
[00:39:00] And sometimes I’ll see people who have patterns of jealousy or patterns of insecurity or shame about this or about that, and it’s just like, remember to remember that’s why you’re here. That’s why, you know, when we look at these things in the subconscious mind that it is key. To really change them. And so self-judgment or self-criticism is the opposite of that.
So just reminding your mind to just remember that if you do find anything, make sure to be kind, because even if you think about our beautiful volunteer, you can tell how big your heart is. You can tell how much she just loves her dad. And by the way, notice even when I said to her, you know about her stepmother treating her dad, well notice she likes her stepmom better.
You can see she loves her stepmom even more when she really sees and is looking at the awareness that she’s good [00:40:00] for her father. Just, just noticing her heart and, and just how she’s thinking and, and feeling, this is just very beautiful. And of course, is it optimal yet? It’s not, but. You see her intentions, you see how much she cares.
And so these other emotions that have been stuck there are not optimal and these other patterns that have come up. And so I just, just, just noticing just the love, the sweetness. And so of course, creating the shift is key for making the real change. And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer.
Caroline. Here we go.
Bingo. And instead of wanting her out of the picture, if you did a better job at fitting in the picture Mm.
Karoline: What?
Brandy: What would that look like?
Karoline: Yeah, I guess it would be more harmonious, kind of. Great.
Brandy: Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So if you did a, didn’t want her out [00:41:00] of the picture, but you literally made an effort to do a better job at fitting in the picture, right?
Mm-hmm. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So is that a little shift or a big shift?
Karoline: It’s a little shift or no, it feels like it was something I thought about at all. So I think this could be, it could be a big shift.
Brandy: It could be a big shift. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to picture what it looks like for you to fit in the picture in a beautiful way, harmonious way, loving way, kind way.
And you have no desire to want to break them up at all. None. You are happy for him? Yeah. He has a relationship that’s working for him that Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe now, by the way, if I ask you, when you were 15, how much would you say that you wanted her out of the picture? What would you say?[00:42:00]
15. Uh, you were in high school. Yeah. Do you want her out of the picture?
Karoline: Like if seven comes up, but Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to brief Yeah.
Brandy: Don’t judge it. Don’t judge it. Just observe. Oh, that’s interesting. Oh, that’s interesting. Yeah. Now, by the way, you’ve probably never heard of a high school kid wanting their parent like wanting to get rid of their stepmom, right?
Karoline: Never.
Brandy: Never. You are the first Never in history. Okay. So don’t judge it. Okay. No, no. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So the emotion comes up and then it gets normalized and, and notice, even as I’m asking you these questions, you haven’t thought about this consciously. It’s just was an emotion that get locked in that’s now been there.
So you get so used to it. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. Great. That makes sense. So don’t judge it. [00:43:00] Yeah. Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. Now, outta curiosity, let’s say somebody wanted you outta the picture, how loving and kind would you want to be to them?
Karoline: Yeah. Not very. If somebody, no, I’ll feel, you’ll feel it and it’ll, it’ll be like, yeah.
Yeah. Not a good circle kind of thing.
Brandy: Yeah, exactly. So imagine if somebody wants you out of the picture at a 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, somewhere in there and they want you gone. Yeah. Would you be like, oh, hey, how’s your day going? How was your day go? Or do you think, well,
Karoline: it could bother you. Yeah, I think it would bother.
Bother me. Yeah. Okay.
Brandy: So I’m gonna ask you to Uhhuh. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and by the way, if [00:44:00] somebody was mad at you at a level eight, do you think you would know?
Karoline: Yeah.
Brandy: What if they tried to hide it? You still think you would know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. So if somebody wanted you outta the picture at a 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, do you think you would know?
Yeah. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So maybe that might have an impact on your relationship also. Yeah.
Karoline: Yeah. Okay.
Brandy: I think so.
Karoline: I, yeah, I wasn’t seeing where it started because it’s, yeah, it gets like a circle, like a bad circle when it’s like that. So Uhhuh.
Brandy: Okay. Yeah. Love your awareness. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and I want you to notice your level in your stomach.
Zero to 10. What’s your level?
Thick? [00:45:00]
Karoline: About The thick, I think. Bingo.
Brandy: Interestingly, it feels like it moved almost a little bit from the front to the back a little more. Does that make sense to you? Is it, it is an interesting feeling, yeah. Okay. So gimme one second. Go ahead.
Karoline: You know. Yeah. It, it feels like it more moved a little bit. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Brandy: Gimme, gimme one second. Bingo.
There we go. That’s why. Okay. Uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe now. If somebody wanted, you gone. Hmm. How closely would you watch them?
Yeah, probably close. Oh,
Karoline: that’s weird. Why? Yeah. I think I would want to have an eye on that person too. Oh, [00:46:00] weird. Yeah. I kind of track the situation.
Brandy: Yeah. Oh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. And by the way, what would that feel like for you to be married and feel like somebody’s wanting to break up your relationship?
Karoline: Yeah, that would feel really bad. It would feel bad, wouldn’t it? It would be the worst. Yeah.
Brandy: Yeah. Especially when you have kids with that person and, and a whole life, it wouldn’t feel very good, especially if it’s the person’s daughter. So then they like the person’s always around, like it would just be a lot.
Right. Yeah. Okay, so, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So if I ask you, could you make a better effort to at least be happy for him, even if you are not connected? So notice you said something to him a couple months ago, correct? Yeah. And it wasn’t very flattering for her, right? [00:47:00]
Karoline: Uh, no, no. I just told him what told him.
What I told you about the feeling criticized thing, not Yeah. Okay. Just telling. Mm.
Brandy: Okay. And, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and so maybe you could clean up your side of the street too, right?
Karoline: Mm-hmm.
Brandy: Okay. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. I’m gonna ask you to smile, and if I ask you, are you willing to change?
Now this is the thing, by the way, if I ask you zero to 10, how much you’re judging your emotions, zero to 10, what’s your level? Yeah, I guess 10. Yes. What are you doing?
Oh, I
Karoline: dunno.
Brandy: So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and best and highest that if I ask you zero to 10, as we’re looking at these emotions that are coming up. [00:48:00] If I ask you to notice the part of you that is, uh, judging and shaming yourself, can you see that? Yeah. Like, oh my gosh, I felt this feeling in this feel.
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah. I feel like, uh, yeah, I judge myself and also like, no, I’m just thinking about like the situation. Maybe that’s not good to go into. Like, uh, like she should have included me and my sister more when we were like so small when they got together. But I guess like, but I can only do my part. Okay.
Brandy: But I have a question for you.
Number one, she’s been in with you for 23 years now, right?
Karoline: Hmm.
Brandy: So you could hold that [00:49:00] against her. Not only that, but I have a question for you. Let’s say you come into a family and you’re the stepmom.
Karoline: Hmm.
Brandy: How do you feel about including the kids? Do you have mixed feelings? Like, oh, I want to include them.
Oh, but I have to be careful because I’m not the mom and I don’t wanna step on toes. Oh. But I want to include them. Oh. But I don’t wanna overstep. Oh. I don’t wanna try to make them feel like I’m trying to replace their mom. Okay. How much would you say that’s a little bit of an interesting dance to dance?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That’s true. Okay. Now, by the way, let’s be honest, don’t you think it’s easier for her to include her kids? Yeah, of course. Exactly. There’s not all the rules and the like, duh, duh. Do I not do I this, do I not? Like, there’s so many rules around it. So it’s not that you’re necessarily. Unloved or less loved.[00:50:00]
It’s that there’s some awkwardness and some rules and some, I don’t know where the lines are and how do we do this, right?
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah, that’s true. I, yeah. Okay. I haven’t thought of it like, like that, but yeah, I can see that. And she, yeah, she does really nice things for, for me today. Like she’s, yeah, I should, uh, yeah, like today, what’d she do today?
Not really today, but like, eh, for December, Christmas, she usually makes like a Christmas, uh, like advent calendar. Mm-hmm. With like small gifts. She knows I would like, so she does that. Yeah. From my father and from her, so, yeah. That’s thoughtful. Yeah,
Brandy: it’s really thoughtful. Oh, [00:51:00] it’s sad that she doesn’t have any effort.
Yeah. If only she would make some type of effort, it would be better. Right? Yeah.
Uh,
all right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, I just love her heart. How beautiful. And I also love this for her, where she’s seeing that her stepmother has made some effort. And the reason that I love this so much for her is of course, when somebody has felt left out or unloved or not included for a long period of time, that doesn’t feel good.
And so what I love is that she can see that her stepmother has made some [00:52:00] efforts. So of course it might feel like I’m quote unquote making her wrong, if you will, where I say, you know, it’s sad that she hasn’t made any effort. But of course, the more she can get those feelings out of the way where she feels like she hasn’t made any effort, she had like her stepmom hasn’t made any effort and hasn’t cared, the more she can also start releasing those feelings and also start seeing that she has put forth effort, the more, of course, our beautiful volunteer can start feeling that feeling of love, of connectedness, of feeling cared about.
And that’s ultimately what I’m wanting her to do, is to really start shifting and to feel that she is important and that she is cared about and that it would be nice if she could feel that. From her stepmother feel that feeling of receiving that, you know, taking that in, that feeling of thoughtfulness and feeling that.[00:53:00]
And then of course, also start reciprocating on that note to really begin working on transforming this relationship in a beautiful way. But I just have to say, I just love this for her because, you know, again, to just feel left out or unloved and not included for so long, and to feel criticized and instead to start feeling connection and thoughtfulness is a beautiful shift.
And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer, Caroline. Here we go.
Okay. Now, by the way, the things that she got were, did they understand you? Did she get you?
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah, she did. Oh, good stuff. And things I can eat and
Brandy: yeah. Oh, so it was also so thoughtful. [00:54:00] Yeah. I’m sure her dad, your dad probably told her, right? Probably. He
Karoline: doesn’t know.
Brandy: So he doesn’t know. But she does.
Karoline: Uh, yeah, I think she has more, uh, yeah, no, no better what to put together.
Brandy: Oh. If only she would make an effort though, you know?
Oh yeah. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So are you sure you’re so unloved?
Karoline: No.
Brandy: And are you sure she’s paying attention in a bad way? It seems like she’s kind of thoughtful. Yeah. Yeah, she’s thoughtful. Um. Now if I ask you how much this is, almost wanting to bring tears to your eyes of feeling, of feeling loved and cared about, what would you say?[00:55:00]
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah, I could feel that stuff. Okay.
Brandy: So, so, um, bingo. Bingo. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe bingo.
And I want you to notice the level in your stomach. Zero to 10. What’s your level? Four. Five. Bingo. Interestingly, when I asked it was like a, yeah, so it’s, it’s, it’s moving around a bit. Um, bingo. Bingo. That’s what I, I got about a, right now, in this moment, yeah. You got about, about a 4.2.
Karoline: Yeah, it’s when I sit up and.
That’s when I really feel the pain. Like I sit
Brandy: in a way that
Karoline: makes it better. Mm-hmm.
Brandy: So, mm-hmm. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. And so notice how thoughtful that was of her to do, right? And notice how in some [00:56:00] ways she knows things about you that your dad may not even know about you, right? Mm-hmm.
And obviously he cares and he loves you. He’s just paying attention in a different way.
Karoline: Mm.
Brandy: Yeah.
Karoline: Okay.
Brandy: So, um, so if I ask you, could you start changing this relationship more and more?
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah.
Brandy: Great. And, um,
could you actually, could you appreciate that she is there for your dad. That he is not lonely by himself. Mm. Yeah. And that he has a marriage. Yeah. Right.
Karoline: Yeah. Yeah. I’m very grateful for that.
Brandy: Okay, great. And, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe Bingo. [00:57:00] Bingo. And notice your level zero to 10. What’s your level?
Um, four. That’s what I’d say I have about, I have about a 3.6. I have about right under a four. Okay. Um, but, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Gimme one second.
So this is what I would say. This is bingo. Uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I’m gonna ask you to close your eyes. And if I ask you zero to 10, how much you can feel the self-judgment. Your emotions zero to 10, what’s your level?
Yeah. 10 I think. I would agree. I would agree. Okay. So this is the thing. So I actually want to leave things here. Okay. And because I [00:58:00] want to give you a moment to, to really look at your emotions without judgment, and also look at the change on them. And what I want you to do ultimately. I, I strongly suggest.
So what I want to do is I want you to see, you see it’s coming down, so this is really great. Uh, you can also see in the beginning I was like, who is this sister energy? From the very beginning I was like, who is this? Because it wasn’t a mom and it wasn’t, and, and, and, but that’s why. So it was, I was looking for, I was like, but there’s this female, so, uh, so the energy regarding her.
So what, what I’d love for you to do is actually just, I think that some of these emotions have been with you for so long and you’ve been so triggered and they started at such a, a young age that you’ve had a reaction to her. So immediately, so intense. And I think giving you a little time to kind of like digest this from a different [00:59:00] perspective and this awareness is going to be key and also.
Then releasing emotions at a deeper level is going to be, so my biggest suggestion is, is for you to go through my video course and take the time and really work with these emotions. And also, um, to get rid of the self judgment. ’cause that’s really going to be, need to be rewired because that is a big piece of it.
Does that make sense?
Karoline: Yeah, it makes sense. And I, I think I in general, judge myself so much for I would agree.
Brandy: I would agree. But this is the thing, right? What the, what I want you to see is this kind of like this. If I ask you how long you’ve been trying to just heal, what would you say?
Karoline: Yeah.
Brandy: Eight
Karoline: years and
Brandy: more so like the last five years, like exactly I lost.
So when you start to see that your pain can and discomfort can actually go [01:00:00] down, as you start to shift this, it gives you more motivation to want to change. Now you have personal motivation to want to change these things. Does that make sense? Yeah. So that’s makes a lot of sense. Yeah. So that’s what I wanted you to see is be just because I see the connection, that’s one thing.
Yeah. But if you see the connection and you can see it start going down, it creates an extra added motivation to change. Because without it sometimes, like if you think about it without it, does a person really have a motivation to change a situation like this? Me, not so much, but then, no. But then when you start to look at it and you go, oh gosh, this is affecting my health.
It gives you a motivation. Yeah. You’re like, okay, okay. I’ll change.
Karoline: Yeah. Oh, that’s so true. Oh, yeah. And also like, yeah, I can feel [01:01:00] like this feeling in my stomach sometimes I just, it pops up like a nervousness feeling in my stomach. I guess it’s probably related to that pattern, or if there’s like Yeah.
Brandy: Many things. Yeah. Um, gimme one second. Yes.
So what I would say is this, I would say that, that you’ve wanted them to break up for so long that it just got really ingrained in you. A long time ago, and it’s just been s there for so long, um, that it is an integrity issue. And so there’s a part of the, part of the nervousness type of feeling is, and the feeling of feeling like you’re quote unquote doing something wrong is the feeling that there, there is an integrity issue around this, but it wasn’t necessarily [01:02:00] conscious or intentional, but I would say it just got linked up at a very young age and um, and then just stayed there.
Yeah. So, wow. And then every time she got upset, you were like, bingo. Like even when you talked to your father a couple months ago, it was a complaint about your stepmom, right? So it wasn’t in effort to find a solution, it was in an effort to complain about her. And can you see that?
Karoline: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can see that now.
I wanted him to understand some things, but I can see it was from a more complaint view. Yeah, yeah.
Brandy: Probably wasn’t exactly. Yeah. So, so bingo. So changing that sound good. So that, yeah. But that’s where I would say some of the nervousness is also coming from that feeling that it’s not all quite in [01:03:00] integrity the way it needs to be.
Makes sense? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So don’t change this, just judge it.
Just judge it and feel bad about it, right?
Karoline: Yeah. That’s the plan.
Brandy: Oh, okay. I don’t know that that’s gonna create the outcome you want though. If you just judge it and feel bad about it, it’s the wrong direction. Yeah. So you could begin changing this, right? Yeah, I
Karoline: won’t do that. Yeah.
Brandy: Smart.
Karoline: Wow.
Brandy: Smart. Bingo. So, uh, gimme one second.
Gimme one second. Bingo. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I’m gonna ask you to take in the feeling that you’re excited to change, you’re excited to change, and that you’re [01:04:00] going to be kind to yourself in this process. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to make sure to take that in.
And again, if you could go through my video course, it also works on being kind to self and whatnot. That is my strongest recommendation because these patterns are deeply ingrained and, um, and I really strongly recommend transforming them all of the way. Does that make sense? Beautiful.
Karoline: Yeah. Beautiful.
Brandy: Makes sense my dear. It has been such a pleasure connecting with you.
Karoline: Me too. Uh,
Brandy: thank you. And I want to, I’m cheering you on. I want to see you shift to this all of the way. So it’s gonna, it, it will take some real transformation, but wouldn’t it be sweet to see you more connected with your father and feeling more connected just in relationships in a sweet way, right?
Yeah. Yeah. [01:05:00] It has been such a pleasure. Thank you. So You’re welcome. Beautiful.
Karoline: Thank you too. Thank you so, so much. Thank you. It, yeah. Appreciate it a lot. I, yeah. I haven’t even thought about this pattern. This was even something even through after reflecting so, so much. So.
Brandy: Isn’t it funny how they, they, they hide and, but now you can see it.
Yeah. So we get it.
Karoline: Yeah. Now I can see it. So thank you.
Brandy: You’re welcome. You’re so welcome.
All right, so let’s go ahead and bring everything together. And first and foremost, I just love her so much. I love her authenticity, her awareness, her heart. She really just has so much love for her father. It is so sweet. So I just love that. I love her self-awareness. I [01:06:00] also really love her comment that she mentioned at the end where she said, after so much self-reflection, she hadn’t even seen it.
But if you think back to the very beginning, as soon as I mentioned her stepmother, she said, oh, she immediately knew what I was talking about. She immediately mentioned that she was triggered by her stepmother very frequently. So you can see that she had this awareness like she knew this pattern was there, but.
She didn’t realize that it was connected to her health. Now of course there were multiple pieces to this, you know, the feeling of feeling unloved. And so there are a lot of just key pieces. And what I also love though, is she was able to see the shift start happening. And so I love that she could see it where she was able to get her pain down from about a six, seven, down to about a three, four right in there.
And so I love that she could see the change [01:07:00] start happening now. Of course likely this will end up coming back up. And that’s the reason that I mentioned that she’ll really want to follow through to make a real change. And of course, really address these at a deeper level. Because when I’m working with somebody in this way, you know it’s not necessarily getting into their subconscious mind at a deeper level.
And that’s the reason that I mentioned to her that I’d strongly recommend going through my video course because in doing so, it helps to get the information in the subconscious mind and teach her how to do that and to create that real change. So I don’t want to make it sound like this change is just super easy and just think in a different way.
There is definitely a level of follow through needed and also being kind to herself. But what I love is also that feeling. Of her starting to feel loved even more, or even more cared about and more included, and [01:08:00] creating that for her because, you know, noticing how much she really loves her father, and then feeling like her and her sister on the outside of it.
I wouldn’t want her to feel that way for her entire life. You know, that’s a painful feeling to feel that you were suddenly replaced and on the outside, and of course this is the reason that we always talk about the gift in healing and Heal Yourself. Change Your Life is because as she makes these changes, it becomes truly a life changing gift.
I mean, how beautiful would it be to have her and her sister and her family feeling. More included and spending her life like that and feeling that love and feeling the connectedness and not feeling criticized or left out or replaced, but really genuinely feeling that feeling. And that’s what I love for her is that change.
And that’s what I love about Mind [01:09:00] Body healing is just the message that the body is giving you. It is so powerful when you really look at what is that change? And of course it can be very hidden. It can feel very much in the subconscious mind, but making that change is really pivotal. Life changing. So that of course, is my hope for her is to follow through and create that.
And that, of course is my hope for you and for everybody in our world that ultimately really learning how to use your mind to heal yourself and change your life. And so on that note, I wanna ask you to please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode. You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know.
Because the more that every single person in our world feels healthy and happy and loved and loving, the better this world is for everybody. So please do hit the share button. And by the way, if you are somebody who would like to get a deeper level of [01:10:00] understanding of mind body healing and how it works, there is a free link in the show notes for a free training, or I also have deep dive video courses available.
They can help teach you how to make a radical shift in your health and your life, in your happiness. And so that said, it has been such a pleasure connecting with you, and I wish you an incredible rest of your day, and I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We’ll see you there.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touch their heart, or help them stay positive in hard times, or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness. Of how amazing we all [01:11:00] really are.
If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point. And the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.
And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming, to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand how to use your mind. You are incredible. And I do wanna be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own.
I make it look very easy because of the [01:12:00] discoveries that I made. You’ll wanna remember that there’s so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you wanna send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at BrandyGillmore.com slash podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you’ll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind. Thank you.
