218 Transcript: Getting Rid of Unwanted Relationship Patterns to Heal

Heal Yourself Change Your Life

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Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore and after recovering from my own life changing injury, it's become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made. That changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I'll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind Your emotions and your energy to help you heal your health yourself and your life.

Let's begin.

Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it and I love today's episode, and I just love our volunteers. She's so beautiful and also. Vulnerable and just has really great self awareness, which makes today's episode really powerful.

You know, in today's episode, we're talking about relationships and how a lot of unconscious emotions or triggered emotions. Can really impact your health in a variety of different ways. Now, one of the things that I love about today's episode is not just the awarenesses and the insights that come from it, but also our volunteer and her reactions.

And you'll notice as we're going through today's episode, you'll notice there are certain things that she's got some intense emotions about. Both negative, but also even positive, that might be a bit counterintuitive. And so what's beautiful is that as we go through today's episode, not only can you hear the responses, but you can see them, you can feel them.

They're just very present. And when we have this depth of awareness, it just can help provide. insight, and an additional level of clarity as to relationships, and navigating them, and the things that you want to change. And by the way, as I mentioned, the topic today is relationships, and something that you'll want to definitely keep in mind.

is remembering to take responsibility for 100 percent of your 50%. So, you know, all of the time people may want to blame others, or they may even want to blame themselves, or they feel powerless. And a lot of times there's, of course, a mix of emotions that can occur where a person is feeling powerless, or they're blaming the other person, or they're blaming themselves.

And what I really love about today's volunteer is. She can see that she's been doing that, and she also kind of starts to do that a bit, but also is willing to look at both sides, which is a huge shift for her to look at both sides of the equation. So just, again, I have so much respect for this woman. Her name is Amy.

She's just a beautiful, beautiful being and As we dive in, just a really quick reminder before we do that this is a session with our volunteer Amy, and the entire session was about 45 or 50 minutes. And so I cut it into two separate segments, and we covered the first half last week. And as you'll recall from that, a lot of that had to do with feelings of being a bit.

Combative or that fight energy in a relationship and also feelings of wanting to make another person wrong. Now, what I love is our volunteer's heart, because as you'll see, as we dive into today's episode, you notice that she absolutely has a feeling of wanting to be right, but she's also not trying to.

Be mean or make him wrong. It's just because, of course, we can get caught in our own emotions. And so, I love her awareness in exactly that. That she does have this need to always be right. And of course, then the side effect. of that is always making him wrong, which of course continues the trigger in the relationship.

And so again, we're going to unpack this even more. There are so many profound insights, but just wanting to note, I love her self awareness and her self honesty and her authenticity is just really, really beautiful. And so is her heart. And so on that note, let's go ahead and dive in with our beautiful volunteer, Amy.

Here we go.

I don't ever have the intention of making him feel horrible. I know, but if you think about it, you have the intention of being right, over him, right? Mm. Okay, so I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I'm going to ask you to notice the level in your head. Zero to ten, what's your level?

About a three. That's exactly what I would have said. So about a three, right? Bingo. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and zero to ten, how much can you possibly Okay, it's kind of like this. Let me, let me further unpack this. Imagine if somebody has an argument or disagreement, right? And in their head, they're thinking, Oh, I should have said this.

And I should have said that. And if I say this, and then I say that, like they're kind of thinking about their strategy, right? Now, your mind never does that, right? It does do that. Uh huh. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And what if you were strategizing about how to create more love?

What if you were strategizing about how to make him feel good? What if you were strategizing about how to make him feel loved and appreciated, and how you guys might have Wonderful connecting time, or, you know, cook together, or, uh, enjoy together, or do something, or be, you know, have a getaway, like, not even necessarily a getaway, but even just spending time together, laughing together.

If you said, Oh, well, what if I, what if we talk about this later? Or what if we talk about that later? Does that make sense? What would happen if you spent your days strategizing? And what I mean by that is this. Is a lot of times when people have been in a relationship for a long time, their partner ends up getting the leftovers.

It's like, oh my god, I did this today with the kids, I did this at work, I did this at work, and woo, I'm tired, let's sit here and blah. Right? Yeah, yeah. And putting some thought into saying, how do I, how do I engage even more? How do I love even more? How do I laugh even more? How do we have a good time? How does this just, it doesn't have to be going anywhere, doing, or doing necessarily anything, it could just be being very attentive and present and playful, you know what I mean?

Mm hmm. We do do a lot of that as well. There is a lot. So I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I want you to notice your level in your head right now, 0 to 10. What's your level? Between a 2 and a 3. Okay, I would have said about, uh, bingo. That's what I said. I would have said about a 2. 2. Okay, so, so I get that you do that also.

I, I, I see that. I feel that. I feel your amount of love for him. I, I feel that, um, and it's beautiful and that's also why you'll notice as soon as you mentioned about leaving, I was like, well, wait a second, whether you do or don't, because I don't want to encourage you to stay either because this is what I do know.

It's kind of like this. Have you ever had this where you maybe a friend asks for dating advice and you say that guy's horrible for you or this, that, the other, and they stay with the guy that's not good for them. Right? Yeah. Yeah, the thing of it is, is because it's, they're patterns, or they're going to attract another and another.

And so, the, the real advice is being willing to change you. And then you'll know, you'll have the intuitive hit, you'll have the attraction towards the right person, the right thing, and, and I would say likely. Your dynamic with S will probably shift. Okay. I mean, that is lovely. That is lovely to imagine.

Absolutely. And so, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And it's kind of like this. If I ask you how much fighter energy you would say he has. What would you say? Zero to ten. Um, that's a good question. Um, a six or a seven. That's exactly what I would have said. So, notice whose spider energy is a little higher.

Yours or his? Uh, mine. Uh huh. So, imagine if you took that out of the equation. What do you think would happen with his? It would, it would drop also. Ah, ah. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I'm going to push a little bit and I'm going to say no, go ahead and stay defensive and make him wrong and go ahead and keep doing that if you want.

It's up to you. I wouldn't recommend it though. I'd change. I'd change if I were you. So you could spend your time making him wrong or you could spend your time in your mind thinking about ways to connect and enjoy and I know you already do. I see you. I feel you. I feel your heart. It's beautiful. It's beautiful.

Beautiful. Beautiful. And I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I'm going to ask you 0 to 10 how much you're willing to change, honestly. Ugh, an 8? There is still a bit of resistance I can feel. There is? I would have, I would have said a 6, but we'll go with your 8. Okay. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and if I ask you 0 to 10, how much you would like for there to be even more love in the relationship, what would you say?

Yeah, 10. 10. So you're just going to wait for him to change first? No. Especially when you have the power to start changing. Yeah, okay. What? Yes, yeah, I hear ya. Uh huh, okay, just checking. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. You hear me? Yes, yeah. Do you want to hear me? Yes. Yeah. Great, great, great. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe.

Do you want to hear him? There are some things that he says that I find very difficult to hear. Okay. Yeah. So, uh, so I'm going to ask you to breathe, and if I ask you, bingo, if I ask you those things that he says that you find very difficult to hear, what would you say those are? It's around, um, well, what I experience is jealousy on his side.

That I feel then restricts my ability to have freedom of choice for myself in, in areas of my life. And, and that's a really difficult one, and that, that's why I fight it, because I feel restricted sometimes. Okay, now I have a question for you. If I ask you zero to ten how often you make him wrong, what level would you say that is?

Oh, I'm not sure. Who would you guess? I'm going to go in the middle and say five. Okay. I'm going to multiply that number by two and say ten. Oh dear. Oh dear. Uh, I'm just playing, but I, but I do see it significantly higher. Yes. Okay. So, so I have a question. If somebody is always making you wrong and making you wrong and making you wrong and making you wrong, how secure do you feel in a relationship?

Yeah, maybe not so secure. So what my point is, is not that you need to own his patterns and whatnot. It's just when you're triggering somebody, then what happens is then they're getting triggered, and they're being reactive, and so what happens if you're always making him wrong, of course he's gonna have a tendency to be probably a bit more jealous or insecure in the relationship, and it's, there's a lot of different emotions.

Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay, and so I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe. And if I ask you if you're really actually willing to be loving and kind and build him up, what would you say? Yes, I am. Like a hundred percent? Uh, yes, I think so. I struggle on this. I do struggle on the part where I feel that his pattern that is repeated in previous relationships before me, um, and that I find restricts my freedoms to choose for myself.

I just find it hard to Okay, so wait a second. So, if I told you that the way that I have freedom in my connections with people in my life is I fight for it. Best way to go? Probably not. Probably not, right? So the way that I have freedoms in my connections in life is I just, it's through communication, through honesty, through kindness, through treating people with respect and love.

Then people, everybody feels safe and secure and good and amazing, like it's, it becomes easy. Okay. Okay. So communicating, so when you communicate with love and you communicate and, and people feel really secure, like it becomes easy. So I'm not saying give up your freedom, not by any means. And I'm not saying keep fighting for it.

I'm saying create it harmoniously. Bingo. Now if I ask you, by the way, how much would you say in your life you have felt like you've always had to fight for your freedom to go do things? Um, in some ways, in some ways. Bingo. Now you ready? There's another pattern. You ready? Mm-Hmm. . If I ask you the part of you that kind of actually likes that he gets a bit jealous, what would you say?

Oh, yeah. I've , I'm aware of, yeah. Now I have a question. You ready? Yeah. Honestly, have you ever intentionally made him jealous? Um, I think I can see, I think in the beginning before I realized what a massive trigger it was for him. I think I did do that. Okay.

So let's go ahead and pause the session right here. And first and foremost, I just love her self awareness. I love her self honesty. Just beautiful. Just beautiful. What I also love is that you can see her authenticity. You know, when I mentioned that particular pattern, you could see her laughing and saying, you know what?

I'm so aware of that one. So I love that she can have a lightness and a sense of humor with herself. And you also notice just how authentic, just her knee jerk reaction is going. Oh, I get it. Now, the interesting thing is, of course, is that she's also extremely frustrated with this pattern as well. And it's not just her, this is so common that in relationships people can both love a pattern and also absolutely hate a pattern and feel like it drives them crazy and it makes them upset and it frustrates them and they want to leave because of it and they also stay because of it.

And what can happen is this, is like we can have emotions or patterns fulfill us. in a different way, meaning that the feeling of His jealousy does make her feel so loved and also safe, like he's not going anywhere. You know, those feelings of safety and love can be really nice feelings in a relationship.

And then simultaneously, though, the feeling of feeling like she can't go and do what she wants to do and doesn't have her freedom because she feels like he's gonna be hurt or upset or not like it, you know, or whatnot, is another part of the pattern that then doesn't feel good. And so you can see how we as human beings can have very mixed emotions.

And of course, again, it's not just her. It's very normal to have mixed emotions. that we need to, of course, address and transform to be able to be happy, to be healthy, to be in healthy relationships. You know, personal development or personal growth is all about developing the self, growing the self, transforming the self.

And so when we start to look at patterns like this of emotions and understanding what emotions are driving our behavior and Our health and going on at a deeper level. I mean, just the awareness of these patterns can be transformative because that's when you liberate yourself to really shift your health, your life, your relationships.

And so again, I just absolutely love this woman. And I love this episode for this very reason. That you can see all of the different emotions. You can see the part of her earlier that's saying, But we do have loving and wonderful and playful moments that are incredible. And she's got that. And then she's also got this part that's stuck with the jealousy feeling and frustrated.

And then there's that. And then there's the part of her that likes the feeling of him being jealous. And then there's that. And you can hear that one in her voice. You can feel her immediate response. And so you can see all of the pieces. And of course, again, that's The importance of every single person in our world understanding their own mind, their own emotions.

Because the more every single person understands their emotions, and what's going on, and their mindset, and how it works, The more we all get to experience beautiful relationships and love and joy and happiness and harmony. So again, I just, I know I'm going off on a tangent here and it's just because I absolutely love the insights from this episode because you can see just how much our subconscious programming can affect our health, our happiness, our relationships, and that we do have the power to change it.

You know, all too often, people will feel a feeling of feeling angry at somebody and also loving them, or resentment and also frustration and also loving them. And when we really understand how to reprogram our minds at a deeper level and how to address these emotions and really change them, it's just pivotal.

And so, I love this. I love her awareness. It's just absolutely beautiful. And let's go ahead and dive in taking it to the next step with our beautiful volunteer, Amy. Here we go.

Okay, so if I asked your energy, if I asked your emotions, zero to ten, how much does a part of you that likes him to be jealous? Zero to ten. What would you say? Um, I don't know. Can we just say maybe it's pretty high. Can we say that or no? What would you say? The consequences of him being jealous is so, so bad that I've spent a lot of time trying to prevent that from happening.

That, that seems to be my experience. Okay, exactly. I hear you. And if I ask you if there's also a part of you who feels loved and flattered as he's jealous, what would you say? Yes. Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. Exactly. So the thing of it is, is what I would say is this, is I would say you have maybe some subconscious mannerisms because you like it at a deeper level.

You have maybe some subconscious mannerisms and subconscious actions that. May help trigger that. Does that make sense? And then, on the opposite side, if you could say So let's say, alright, so kind of like this. If this relationship became even more loving, how happy would that make you? Yeah, that would be wonderful.

Great. So if you said, look it, I made him feel a bit insecure in the beginning. And I can see, I made him jealous sometimes. And I can see part of me has liked that feeling of, of him being jealous. And instead, let me make him feel super loved and secure. Let me do that. Let me make him feel super loved and really secure and see what happens.

What does that look like? Yeah, that looks a lot better. There you go. There you go. So I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I want you to notice your level in your headache, zero to ten. What's your level? In your head, I'm sorry. Around a two. Okay, bingo. Give me one second. Bingo. All right, so I'm gonna ask you to close your eyes for a moment.

And I want you to notice the part of you who's got a lot of blame for him. Can you see that? That's his fault. Yeah, yeah. So this is the thing.

Imagine for a moment if I told you there's somebody in a relationship that could have an amazing relationship. Could have an amazing, amazing relationship. But instead they're like, hmm, it's not my fault. It's not my fault. Uh uh. It's his fault. It's his fault. Nope, it's his fault. I'm gonna make him wrong.

Nope, I might make him jealous. Nope, I might make him wrong. It's his fault. It's his fault. I'm gonna blame him. How soon till the relationship changes and gets better? Well, it's probably not going to. It's probably not going to. Right? Now if I ask you honestly, how often you have felt and thought about leaving the relationship?

Many times. Many, many times. Exactly. So, what happens ten years from now when you're still in the relationship and it's the same and it hasn't changed? And you're still thinking about leaving, and you're still like, okay, well, this is how it is, and this is the pattern, and this is the pattern, and you're still thinking about leaving, and all of that, and twenty years from now, and all of that.

How does that go for your relationship? Yeah, not too well. Okay, so I have a question. Are you done blaming him? I'm trying to be . Okay? Yeah. Bingo. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Now, I want you to think about this for a moment, right? I want you to think about taking responsibility, a hundred percent responsibility for your 50%.

Yeah. A hundred percent responsibility for your 50%, right? Yeah. Now, can you honestly say your 50% is clean? No, I have some responsibility there for sure. Okay, great. I love your awareness So what I would really really do in your situation is I would think about okay Look it before I go blaming anybody else.

Let me clean up my own side of the street. That makes sense Yeah, okay, so I'm gonna ask you to breathe then taking that in before I go blaming anybody else Let me clean up my side of the street and see what happens That make sense? Yeah. Great. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. Bingo.

And I'm going to ask you to take in that feeling. And by the way, I want you to notice the level in your head, zero to ten, what's your level? I'd still say a two, I think. Okay. And I have Okay, so wait a second. I have about a, bingo, I have about a point seven. Where, um, let me see. Um, I have a two, it looks like maybe on the left.

Let's see. That

Bingo. So, I don't know which way you're facing, but I have like a point I have six on one side, and then I have on the other side, I have about a, about a 1. 8. Yeah, I think that's what I'm probably more aware of. Yeah. Bingo. Uh, can you tell me the part that you're most aware of it? Can you, uh Yeah, you were right.

It's the left side of my head. It is left. Okay. Great, great, great. Okay, so great. So give me one second. Bingo. All right. So I'm going to ask you to close your eyes, and I want you to notice the part of you. Bingo. If I ask you 0 to 10, how much would you say that you have a stubborn side? What would you say?

0 to 10. Um, Yeah. Yeah, maybe a 7. So you laugh because maybe you think it might be a little higher, right? Possibly. Okay, we're on the same page.

So, you know your thoughts help create your life, right? Yeah. So wouldn't that make you want to change more? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. So if your thoughts and your emotions, your mindset helps create your life, would you like to spend your life being stubborn and not changing or being open to embracing change and willing to change?

Definitely the second one. Okay. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I'm going to ask you to be willing to take that in, that you're willing to change. You're willing to change. And I'm going to ask you to breathe. You're wanting to change. Now, imagine if I told you, by the way, my thoughts help create my life.

And by the way, I'm so stubborn, I'm not going to change. It's not going to go so well. It's not, is it? So, when do you want to change that? So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I'm going to ask you to close your eyes. And if I ask you, by the way, how often would you say he hits you? No, he doesn't hit me.

He doesn't, right? That's right. So, I'm gonna ask, yep, so I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I want you to notice for a moment how much you're in your nervous system, even when he gets upset, how much it shakes you, right? Yeah. So, if you know that he's not gonna hit you, and he's not gonna harm you, and you know that, could you relax a bit?

Yeah. So, the stuck part that I see is the part of you who likes to blame or poke at him or make him wrong. There's a, there's an antagonist part in it. What? Yeah. Yeah, no, I'm just saying, Oh dear, that's not a good, it's not a good, um, feature to have, is it? Wait, wait, wait. How did we go from changing to judgment?

So I'm going to ask you to breathe. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to focus on changing. So instead I want your response to be, Oh, I should change that. Oh, I should change that. And I'm going to ask you to breathe.

All right, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. Again, I just love her self awareness. I love her self honesty. I love her self honesty about feeling really stubborn. And you can see her self honesty as far as not fully wanting to change all of the way. And again, I just really, really love her self honesty.

Now, notice for a moment, by the way, you also notice that That she's been studying psychology for quite a while because she mentions, Oh, well, he's had this pattern even before me and this, this, this. And so notice that that's what comes up for her. Now, the reason that I point this out. It's of course not to blame her, but because our minds can be tricky and if you notice a big part of what's keeping her stuck are her feelings of blame towards him.

Because when you stop and think about it, she's also had her patterns long before she was in her relationship with him. And so they both come into the relationship with patterns. Now this is what's really important to note from this and what's really exciting. Is this, is when you stop and think about it, I mean, she loves him, she's wanting to leave, she wants to stay, like it's been all of these mixed feelings and she's been feeling stuck and what can happen is we can get inside our heads and think, Oh, should I stay?

Should I go? The biggest thing that I'd always recommend is clearing the pattern because then you will have more clarity. And the easiest way to describe this feeling of clarity is Um, similar to, um, I guess an analogy I might use is this, is I might say, you know, imagine somebody who quit smoking and they quit, they are done, they're a hundred percent done.

And then they smell cigarette smoke and they go, Oh, I don't even want to be around that. And they strongly feel that way. What can happen is exactly that type of feeling, but with your emotions. Meaning that, as you make a genuine transformation towards healthier mind programming, you can then feel like those old patterns or old cigarettes, for example, like you don't even want to be around it.

It just does, you don't want it, it doesn't attract you anymore. That type of feeling. Or what can also happen that's really beautiful that I've seen all of the time is a person really changes their pattern and then their relationship shifts in the most beautiful way. As I was discussing with her, when we have patterns in most all cases, we have some type of unconscious behavior that perpetuates the problem.

And a simple example that I use all the time, if you think about somebody who's had a pattern of rejection. They could end up with programming where they then end up being really, really needy, which unconsciously perpetuates the problem. Point being is that these subconscious emotions can drive unconscious behavior that can trigger your partner.

in a relationship or trigger others so that pattern continues. And so genuinely when you transform a pattern and you really change yourself, many times you can also simultaneously transform your relationship as well. And I see that even in relationships that where people have been married for 45, 50 years.

And so either way, point being. Whether it's finding clarity or leaving the relationship or healing the relationship all change really does Start inside of you and making sure to address the pattern and really being willing to change it instead of getting caught up in Blame or pointing the finger at anybody else But genuinely changing the self, that's when you really transform your patterns, your life, your relationships.

Now, I say this, but keep in mind, if you're in any type of relationship that is abusive or unsafe for any reason, then of course you'd want to leave the relationship, but make sure To change your patterns as well. I mean, you've heard me on past episodes where we discuss, you know, a woman who unfortunately has an abusive man, leaves him and finds the abusive boyfriend, boss, spouse, et cetera, et cetera.

You know, that pattern can continue. And of course the same pattern with jealousy. In fact, I've seen it all the time where this exact situation can happen and somebody's Triggering somebody and somebody's feeling jealous and it's just this, this perpetual feeling, you know, they're triggering each other.

You know, one person's in fear and feeling like a victim to the jealousy and meanwhile at the same time they're triggering the other person to feel jealous and the other person's feeling really jealous and then also guilty and feeling bad about themselves for feeling so jealous and then it makes them more jealous.

Because they feel more insecure and it just perpetuates the pattern. And then the other person then feels like a victim and feels like, Oh, I can't do anything. And then simultaneously, like the patterns trigger each other in an unconscious way. And so again, point being right here is if you're feeling unsafe or you feel like the relationship really is toxic, then you'd want to leave the relationship and then genuinely.

transform the pattern. And by the way, I just want to say in every situation, the very pattern that is triggering us can be the very thing that is affecting us and triggering our health. I mean, patterns are tricky. You know, even if you think about in my own situation with my health, a huge part of what was triggering my own health.

was underlying fear. And then of course, as I got injured, wheelchair walker Cain, I felt less capable, which did what? It triggered a lot more feelings of fear. And so that's the very thing is sometimes the situations that we're in can just create that snowball effect of creating more of that same emotional pattern that we don't.

And of course, for me to get out of my situation. I really had to, to change, to change the emotional pattern. And so for your health, for your life, for your relationships, again, making sure to look at and become clear on what that emotional pattern is and create that genuine change helps you to really liberate yourself from that situation.

All right. So that said, we're going to go ahead and dive back in with our beautiful volunteer, Amy. Here we go.

And taking in the feeling. Oh, I need to change that. Oh, I'm definitely going to change that. Alright, now I want you to notice the level in your head. 0 to 10, what's your level? Down to a 1. That's what I would say. I got about a 1. 1, 1. 2, 1. Right in there. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe.

Now, why don't you just for a moment to take in what it feels like for it to be at a one. How is that for you? That's great. It's such a, such a relief. Such a relief. Such a relief, right? So this is the thing, is we could keep going and I could keep pushing. And we can get it all the way down to a zero, but the chances of it coming back, it would probably come back because you're very stuck in your way of thinking.

Does that make sense? Okay. So what I think would be best to do is even just stop right here. And instead of pushing to change, Reflect, because I know when you come on here, you don't know what's going to come up. And then you go, Oh, changing this. Okay. Well, that's kind of out of left field. Oh, this, this isn't what, like kind of, if I ask you how much you expected this to come up, what would you say?

I expected that it might be something to do with that relationship, but I, yeah, I didn't expect it to go the way it has to around that. Yeah. Exactly. Okay. So the thing of it is. is that, um, it went in a different way than expected. So point being is it, is it, let's allow you to digest the change because what is most important is authentic change, is real change.

Right? We can push and push and push, but the most important part is when you say, I want to change. Does that make sense? Yeah. Beautiful. The other thing is is I want you to embody and practice feeling a sense of being able to do what you want and communicate it kindly, and also practice not attacking him.

So, even today. So, I want you to kind of really take some of these things that we've been talking about and embody them and put them to practice. How does that feel to you? Yeah, no, that feels really good. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. So if I ask you just for a moment to notice, notice the level in your head, 0 to 10, what's your level?

Maybe just less than a 1. Mm hmm. And who did that? Well, with your help, I did that. You did that, right? So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And I'm going to ask you to take in the feeling that you're, you're amazing. You're amazing. Your thoughts, your emotions, your mindset is so powerful. So powerful. You're amazing.

What happens if you use it for even more love? Brilliant. What happens? Right? Wow. Huh. And I'm gonna ask you also, can you just take a moment and can you find the feeling of loving self? Please? Can you find the feeling of loving self, that even in this relationship with s, that you're gonna show up with even more love.

And even in the relationship with self, you are gonna show up with even more love. And even as you're making these changes and, and, and incorporating them, you're not gonna judge self. You're not going to be feeling bad towards self, you're just saying, okay, let me clean up my side of the street. How does that feel to you?

Yeah, that feels good. Beautiful. By the way, I just have to mention, you have a very beautiful heart and I see you. So we could sit here and we could talk about all of the great things in you also, but of course what we're working on is shifting where the, where the problem is, right? Absolutely. And thank you, Brandy.

Really do. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for opening my eyes to what I wasn't seeing. You're beautiful, you're beautiful, and you're so, so welcome. You're so welcome. And, uh, while you're opening your eyes, could you make sure to also just notice a little bit more of that amazingness in you? Because it's, it's, uh, it's there, and it's beautiful, so I, I see that, and I just, uh, just want to acknowledge that as well.

So, make sure to follow through, um, and I'd love to see you keep this gone, and all of the, all of the way gone, okay, and, uh, and really make this authentic change, okay, beautiful? Absolutely. And thank you again. I really appreciate your time and your energy and your care. You are absolutely so, so, so welcome.

You're so welcome.

All right. So let's go ahead and bring the last few insights together. And I have to say, first and foremost, she's just so beautiful. Fantastic job. Great job. She got her pain down all the way down to a level one, which is really, really great. Now I want to emphasize, as we can see from her patterns. We can see there's a lot of stuckness, and there's also a lot of resistance to change.

Okay, and so if she doesn't really genuinely embrace these changes and follow through, chances are this will get re triggered. It will come back. And so I just want to emphasize that because I know all the time I make it look really easy to get results. But it does take real change. You can't trick universe, God, energy, your body, Mother Nature, whatever you want to call it.

You can't trick it, and you can see the level of resistance and uncertainty about change, which means that with this one, we can see there's a really high chance this will come back, because those emotions are very much still there. I mean, they're shifted right now, but likely, again, likely they'll come back.

And maybe they won't. Maybe she does embrace the change fully. Maybe she really does this and embraces it fully. That's also not the point, you know, a lot of times when I'm showing people how to release pain in a really short period of time Yes, that would be great to keep it gone. Absolutely. That would be perfect However, the goal isn't necessarily to heal in five minutes.

Though again, that would be great. It's also to embrace a real change. That is the key. That is the point. And so even when I'm demonstrating this, this works great for a demonstration. She's really going to need to follow through. So just wanting to emphasize that. And that is the takeaway is that if you are in a challenged relationship, I want to invite you to be willing to shift it.

And to be willing to change all of the way to create that radical change in your life because the clarity that comes from that can help you, of course, shift your relationship, your love, your life, your health, your happiness, you know, all of it. And that's what's really beautiful. And so that, of course, is today's episode.

Now, as always, I want to ask you to please do make a point to hit the share button on this episode. You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don't even know, because the more happy and healthy that every single person is in our world The better this world is for all of us.

And so please do make a point to hit the share button and please do make a point to have a most wonderful, happy, healthy rest of your day. And I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We'll see you there.

Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touch their heart or help them stay positive in hard times or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness. Of how amazing we all really are.

If today's episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those, you know, who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone.

What we are all capable of. And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life. If you really understand how to use your mind, you're incredible.

And I do want to be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You'll want to remember that there's so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore.

com slash podcast. And if you're currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well. Lastly, please remember if you do have any health issues, you won't want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you'll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds.

With what you're capable of with your mind. Thank you.

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In this course Brandy shares the exact things she did to heal (even when doctors told her there was nothing more she could do) so you too can be empowered with tools and techniques to heal yourself and change your life. Click here to learn more.

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Also, please remember that genuine change and follow through are key for self-healing results. If you struggle with negative thoughts or have a chronic health issue or chronic pain, please do not avoid seeing your doctor.

Instead, your goal with self-healing should be to continue to see your doctor as recommended and blow their mind with what you are capable of with your mind and with the power of mind-body healing.  Please enjoy this self-healing podcast!