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Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life changing injury, it's become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I'll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here, continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it. And you know, I just love today's episode and it is definitely. a unique episode where we can learn different things from people going through hardship or challenges.
And that's one of the things that I love about this episode. Another thing, you know, I always say we get the best volunteers ever, and we do. And our volunteer today, her name is Kristen, and you're absolutely, you're just going to love her, her heart, and also You know, you know, let's be honest. We've all been through our stuff in one way or another, and it can be hard.
It can be challenging. It can feel painful. And when you're in that place and you say, okay, look, I'm going to reach out. I'm going to do something. I'm going to lift myself. I'm going to make a change. And you're really willing to do that. That, it takes courage, it takes doing things in a different way, it takes, you know, thinking in a different way, being smart, being somebody who's going to think outside of the box.
It takes effort. It does. It takes effort to show up. But the beautiful thing is when you make that effort and you really do it and you really make the changes, it's worth every bit of it. And that's one of the things that I love. about today's episode is our volunteer. She's working on healing herself and she's been through some hardship and today's episode was really going to talk about, you know, happiness and also mental health and being able to lift yourself and then also dealing with some.
Challenging, really challenging things. And one of the things that I'll want you to notice as we dive in with our beautiful volunteer is one of the things she says is she says, you know, it's like her brain is, she doesn't know how to be happy. It's like programmed for negativity and it's stuck there. And then you'll hear also some other things.
If she's been through some challenges and, and so there's, there's some hardship, um, that is definitely mentioned in here so that that feels a bit. Feels a bit harsh, you know, feels a bit like it kind of catches you. And, and, and at the same time, there's so much to learn from others. You know, if you think about it all day long, people are learning from my mistakes and the mistakes that I made with my own injury and then how I learned to heal myself.
And I think that there is so much that, that we can learn from today's episode. And I think that our volunteer, again, is just a beautiful being. And I think one of the things that we can learn even coming right into this is a willingness for resilience. And by the way, a little bit of a spoiler alert, but I love the end of this episode.
I love where she gets to and the wisdom and the beauty and the laughter that comes at the end of the episode, and then there's also some. Challenging parts, some, um, you know, she's, she's had some challenges. And so on that note, let's go ahead and dive in with our beautiful volunteer. Kristen, here we go.
Hello. It's wonderful to meet you. How's your day going? It's it's just okay. Every day is just okay. Um, I'm struggling emotionally. Um, my father recently committed suicide. His 1 year anniversary is coming up and he has struggled with suicide for, um, for the last 18 years. Um, I have been basically traumatized by this man and.
It has been a roller coaster. Um, I'm not lying when I say this and I'm probably sending low numbers, but in the last 18 years, he has been on life support 55 times and for whatever reason, all of his previous temps, you know, did not work. Um, and he would always wake up from them and. You know, every time, you know, cause I'm the next of kin and I would have to get the call and it was always, this is it.
He's not going to make it. And then somehow he would pull out of it. And, you know, it was, as you can imagine, the emotions that I have dealt with over the last 18 years have been just horrendous with him. Um, yeah, lots of guilt, lots, you know. Anger, frustration, there's just so much. I don't know how to not think negatively.
And unfortunately, he is one of 10 children and 5 of them have committed suicide. He just recently, um, committed suicide by, you know, a completely different. way that, you know, I knew it was gonna happen. I knew he would go. I was actually waiting for it to happen. That's how bad he was suffering. Like, I felt that was gonna be his only peace.
You know, there were times he would wake up and even himself would say, I can't, you've got to be kidding me that I'm here. What is, what is going on? And the way he ended up going this time was very traumatic. Um, it was not like what he typically did. He would typically. Overdose on all of his medications, um, and there were other attempts with trying to hang himself as well and trying to, um, you know, I used to think he was just doing this for pity, um, until I realized there was 1 day, he actually drank a whole bottle of antifreeze and.
The doctors were just completely shocked that he just didn't go right away, um, and that's when I realized that he really was, you know, didn't want to be here, but it wasn't so it wasn't just pity. I hear you. So I have a question for you.
Now you're in this place and you don't have to go through this anymore, right? And I know that it's been hard and I understand and if I ask you, are you ready to live your life to its fullest? Are you ready to heal? Yes. Oh, absolutely. I, when he passed away, um, and this is awful to say, and it's sad, um, when he passed.
I was grateful. I was so grateful because we could start our lives. We could start living.
All right. So let's go ahead and take a moment and pause it right here, because this is a really important insight. Notice she just said, you know, this is really awful to say, and this is sad, but I feel grateful. That I could start living my life, that she was feeling grateful that she had this freedom.
Now, what's important to note is that if you recall, as we stepped into this session, she mentioned that she didn't know how to be happy. It's like her brain was programmed for negativity. And notice right here, if you think about it, as she mentioned that it sounds awful. If she's happy, that it's sad, that it's not good, that she can live her own life.
So the problem is, is it the way that the brain works, it gets information linked up. And once information is linked up, it affects each other. So anytime any information is stored together, it becomes an automatic type of programming, just like if I say A, B, C, D. You probably know what's next. It's programmed in your mind into the alphabet or 1, 2, 3 You know what's next.
And so when things get linked up in the mind, it controls your brain. It programs your brain. And so there's a reason that her brain is programmed where she said it's stuck in the negative. She doesn't know how to be happy. It's programmed in the mind. And so it makes it hard or even feel impossible to To be happy.
To then also, of course, live her life. Because now she said, well, it sounds awful and sad. But she was happy to be able to live her life, but now she's stuck. She's still stuck. And it's because of course, we get this subconscious programming and I have so much compassion for her. And I also just love this.
I love her heart. She has her heart in a beautiful place. And I love that she's showing up because she's also getting her mind there too. But a beautiful, beautiful being. And of course there's this stuckness. Now we're going to build on this even more as we dive in about understanding about what needs to shift to be able to create a real change.
And so that said, let's go ahead and dive back in with our beautiful volunteer, Kristen. Here we go.
So if I ask you why you feel guilty, why do you feel guilty? Um, I mean, I I just feel bad that somebody lived that way and that he suffered that much and, you know, I did everything I possibly could to try to help him. I had gone, you know, I have gotten him sectioned. I've had to stand up in court up against him and try to argue that, you know, he needs to be sectioned and he needs help.
I've done that a couple of times. Okay, so I have a question. Yes. I have a question. So, I want you to notice the part of you who has this argument inside of you, so to speak, this defense that says, but I did everything, but I did everything, right? Mm hmm. But what if you don't need a defense? What if everybody understands?
What if nobody's blaming you? I know that they're not. Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. So, if nobody's blaming you, and nobody's criticizing you, and nobody's saying it's your fault, could you let that argument in your head go? Yeah, yes. Now, if you completely let that argument, so to speak, in your head, that defense, if you completely let that go, how would your mind feel?
How would it feel inside your thoughts? It feels wonderful. Great. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now, if I ask you, who do you feel like is blaming you for this? Uh, no, uh, nobody. I don't really feel like I'm being blamed for it. That's not the type of guilt that I hold. Okay, so can I ask you to breathe for just a moment?
And if I ask you how much you feel like self is blaming you for this, what would you say? Yeah, probably. Yeah, I say there is somebody who is blaming yourself, and it is self. Okay. Zero to ten. How much can you see that self is blaming self? Yeah. Ten. Ten. Mm hmm. Okay. So think about this for a moment. That self is blaming self, which means that you've got to keep up this defense all of the time, because now you've got to defend against self, who's simultaneously blaming self.
Does that make sense? Yes. Okay. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I want you to think about what it would feel like in your head if self wasn't blaming yourself either. I'd feel wonderful. Uh huh. I'd feel wonderful. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And I want you to notice there's a part of you who blames yourself because you feel like you didn't take it seriously at first.
Can you see that? Yeah. What's that? Yeah. I mean, I think what I'm stuck in is that I miss my dad. I miss that guy. I missed, I missed out. My kids missed out. My, I needed him to help guide me and be there for me. Bingo. So, so notice for a moment that part of you that's feeling unsafe without him. Can you see that?
Yes. He was like a Go ahead. He was, when I was little, that's what I don't understand, like he was when I was little but not as an adult, so I don't understand. He wasn't safe for me. Uh huh. I hear you. remove myself completely from him because I had to after trying so many times. Exactly. Uh, the, the way I would put it is this, bingo.
It's like the feeling, do you have animals? Yes. Okay. Two what? Two dogs. Two dogs. Okay. Now, if you're home in your house and you have your two dogs and they are sleeping in another room, now compare that to, for a moment, If you're home by yourself and the dogs aren't there, is there a difference? Does the house feel differently if different, if they're there or if they're not there, even if they're in a different room?
Yes. Yes. Right. So there's still a feeling as though you have company, even if they're not even in the same room, right? Right. And so, notice for a moment with your father being passed, there's still this sense of like vacancy, if you will, of feeling like he's not in the room with you. Does that make sense?
Yeah. Yes. Bingo. Okay. So give me one second, because if I were to give me, give me one second, because I want to make sure that that bingo. Okay. So what I want to do is I want to follow the train of thoughts that's, that's going to help to get you the unstuck the quickest, right? Now if I ask how often in your head you have this story going on that says, but I did everything that I could.
And did I do this? And I did everything. And I tried everything. How often that is going on in your head? Um, not actually, I have, I'm pretty strong with knowing that I did do everything I can. So I don't really hold that guilt of didn't help you because I did. I mean, I really fought for him, so I don't really hold that.
That's not what I hold on to. I hold on to how I missed out with loving parents. a parent, a dad, um, who could be there for me and we could be a family. Okay, so I would Okay. So this, this is what, what I would say if I were to interpret it in other ways, bingo. So if I just go to the root feeling, if I go to self blame, uh, like you said, uh, there, there's a level 10 from self.
I see that very clearly. Okay. And so what happens is this, it's kind of like this, imagine, have you ever done this before where you really, really, really love somebody and you're also really pissed off at them? Yep. Yep. Exactly. Right. So when, when I say that I see the blame and you even saw it too, you mentioned it's a 10, right?
And then you go, but. I also know that I did everything that I could, right? So both are true. So that's like saying, if, if let's say, if I was talking to somebody, I say, I said to them, do you see how you're really, really mad at this person? And they say, yes, but I really, really, really love them. And I'm like, well, yeah, I see that you love them too, but I also see that you're mad at them as well.
Like both feelings exist. Does that make sense? Exactly. That's exactly how I feel. Yep. Exactly. So the problem is, is that they're kind of, uh, fighting each other inside your mind. So when you said that you have a hard time even keeping your mind in a happy place, um, it's because it's got these kind of arguments going on.
Does that make sense? Inside of it. Yeah. And so that's one thing. The other thing is, is that Bingo. That. There's a feeling of loss of sense of safety, and I'm not saying your dad necessarily provided that safety, but it's, it's like, um, how do I put it? So I use the dog in the room, so to speak, as the analogy, but okay, kind of like this.
If you knew that you had a father who could always be there for you, even if he wasn't, but you just knew that you had a father in this lifetime who could be there for you, how much better would you feel? So much better. Exactly. So, so I'm going to reflect this to you. If I said, if I knew I had a father, even if he wasn't there, but if I knew I had a father that could be there, if I needed him, I would feel so much better.
Yes. Can you see how there's a sense of security even if it doesn't make logical sense? Yes. So, that's the feeling that your, your, the self is craving. Does that make sense to you? Yeah. Yes. Okay. So, the thing of it is, is this. Is that because at a very young age, he was your sense of security. Can you see that?
Yeah. How much was he, your sense of security at a young age? Um, a lot. Yeah. Hugely. And so this is what happens, right? It's like, it's silly analogy, ridiculous analogy is if you, let's say you're in the kitchen and your forks and silverware are normally in a certain spot. And so every time you go to get your silverware, you open that same drawer, but it's not there.
And so what's happened is your brain has been programmed that security from a young age is dead. And so what's happening is then your subconscious mind is going, but security is gone, but security is gone. And what's got to happen is that. You've been through this trauma and part of what's happened is that you've with all of these calls because it's always been linked up that that silverware drawers in the same place.
It's like through the last 18 years of this happening, it's like security, no security, security, no security, but then I want him to be there, but I don't, but then I can't. And so point being is part of what's got to happen is that you really need to rewire your mind to feel a sense of security. not from him because your mind is so ingrained from a young age that it was him.
Does that make sense? Yeah. Yes. Beautiful. I love that. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. Now imagine what it would feel like moving forward if you felt a sense of security in life. You felt a sense of security in self. You felt like You know what? This life is safe. Universe is safe.
Life supports me and you really, really, really felt that and you really felt like you have a strong system in life, but you really felt like universe number one out of anything. Universe supports you and it's safe and things always work out and it's safe and you're safe and you also feel like you have a great system and connection of people all around you, but you really, really felt safe.
If I ask you, How would that feel in your life moving forward? How pivotal would that be? It would be absolutely amazing.
All right, so I want to go ahead and pause the session right here and unpack this even more because let's be honest, it's hard to be happy and flourish in life if you're in a state of fear. And so there's a couple insights that I want to invite you to think about. Because, you know, a few things happen, you know, as I was talking to Kristen about fear and it's like stability, what we feel like we get our safety from is so important.
And that's the first thing I want to invite you to look at in your life is exactly that is making sure that you're getting it from inside of you or from universe or, you know, the feeling of faith or even setting a vision. And having that vision and programming your mind towards that. Now, I know all too well what it looks like and what it feels like to live in fear.
And, you know, that was my life going through my injury. And by the way, you know, even going through my injury, I had this feeling, you know, I was in all of this fear and, and I remember, you know, just, I was, Depressed. I was in, and by the way, even when my doctors, I had, I remember having a conversation with one of my doctors and there was that whole depression word that came up and I said, you know, I'm not depressed.
I have a problem. I have a problem and I can't get better. And if I could just get better, then I wouldn't be in fear anymore. I would be safe. I wouldn't be depressed. I wouldn't, you know, cause I was, I was a mess. I was hurt. I was injured. I was stuck. I was all of these things. Now, my point is, is that part of what was affecting my health was this, all this fear.
And then of course, as fear was affecting my physical body and my body wasn't healing and I had this injury, well, now I can't work and I was injured and in all of this pain, so then what did it create? More fear. And more fear, like, so I was in this cycle. And so that's what happens all of the time with people, is that we can be in this cycle in an emotional state where we feel stuck and we can't get out of.
You know, of course, it happens in all different areas of love where people feel unloved and then the more they feel unloved, then they might feel more needy or, or afraid to connect with people. You know, it could go either way where they just don't want to connect at all because they're afraid of rejection or they become really needy and then they create it and then it perpetuates and then they feel more unloved and you know, so it's like these patterns.
can continue. And that's exactly what happens is we get stuck in them. And then you start to feel depressed and like it's impossible. And it's an insurmountable problem. Like you just can't, there's no way out. And I get it. I was there. And my point being is that That's exactly what I did. You know, I learned to reprogram my mind.
So I started getting myself out of fear. At the time I had no logical reason to do so. Meaning that, you know, all the time we want everything to be perfect in our world and then we're happy. Or we want to feel really, really loved. Then we'll take in love or we're going to feel really, really safe. Then, you know, I have life is really, really safe.
Then we feel safe. But the problem, the challenge with that is all change starts on the inside. And not only that, but of course our thoughts help create our lives. And so we can get stuck in these patterns. And it feels like there's no way out. And I, again, I really, I don't want to make it sound, you know, think positive.
No, it takes real change. And so it's not just about thinking positive. It's about genuinely reprogramming your mind, real reprogramming. And that's another thing that I love about. This episode is that I want you to think back to the other insight when we were talking about programming, that it's, it's awful for her to be happy and grateful and wanting to live her life.
Those things got linked up. So that's the second insight right here. I want to invite you to think about that in your life because I've heard. So many people say, Oh, it's awful, but I feel happy. Or, Oh, well, I, you know, I'm so happy, I feel guilty. I shouldn't feel this happy or, or things like that. And so of course, what happens is they get that linked up and then it controls their brain programming.
And so what I love about this conversation. is that you can see how her brain is programmed, that it is awful for her to be happy and grateful in life and live a great life. Now, of course, I'm not saying at all, to be clear, I am not saying that it is horrible and that she should feel bad. I'm excited for her to live a full, wonderful life.
And by the way, that's part of where we go. There's a lot of really, really great insights on the second half of her session. So I just wanted to pause it here because I wanted to invite you to think about this in your life, that if you've been struggling with your own happiness, that you take it seriously.
Of course, that you're reprogramming your mind. And also addressing things that could suck the joy out of life. And of course, living in fear, it can definitely do that. It is so hard to flourish, to be happy, to be healthy, to love fully. If you're feeling a lot of fear, so it's hard to enjoy life. I've been there, so I get it.
And by the way, I want to make sure you're hearing me clearly that I'm not saying simply think positive, okay? It's deeper than that. It is rewiring your brain that it is good to be happy, that it is okay to be happy. And of course, there are a lot of insights of doing that, of creating that real change, but I want to make sure from this episode that you're willing to look at a few things and embrace the change in your own life.
And so one of those things would of course be, do you feel genuinely like it's great for you to be happy? It's not bad. It's not awful. You don't have to feel guilty, but do you really feel like it's good for you to be happy and healthy and love life? And so that is one thing that I want to invite you to look at.
And then of course the other is that if you are. Feeling unsafe in life and fearful, being willing to reprogram your mind. To, of course, make that change. And so, that's something else I just want to remind you is that everything that the mind does, it does it for a reason. Even when it does all of the wrong things, it feels like it's working in a negative way and it's not helping you, it is always doing so because it's programmed on some level to do exactly what it's doing.
You know, just like a computer, a computer works the way it works because of programming. And the same is true with our minds. It's everything they do. They do it for a reason. So I want to invite you to look at these in your life and see if you can uplevel them. If you can take these insights and apply them in a positive way to your life.
Also, if you are somebody who has been struggling with depression, then of course, You want to take things very seriously. Now, one thing that you could do is there is a podcast, um, that I'll have my team put in the show notes of a young man that I worked with who was struggling with depression and literally his episode, you just, it lights you up the level of happiness and joy.
Uh, it's just beautiful. So I'll have my team leave that in the show notes. And also third, of course, if you are in a place where you are having suicidal thoughts, make sure to see a professional. Get immediate help to make sure that you're in a safe place. So I just do, of course, want to say that as well.
So that said, you know, taking care of our mental health and our happiness and our physical health, you know, addressing it. Taking it seriously. So important. All right. So that said, on the next episode, next week, we're going to dive back in with Kristen. There are some other really profound insights on making the shift where you just have more clarity and understand.
Mind programming. So I love it for that reason. And I just love her. I love her heart. I love her willingness to create a change. It's just really, really beautiful. And so I look forward to seeing you there next week. And as always on this episode, I want to ask you to please do make a point to hit. the share button, you know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don't even know, because the more happy and healthy and loving and loved that every single person is in our world, the better this world is for all of us.
And so please do make a point to hit the share button and please do make a point to have a most wonderful, incredible, happy and healthy rest of your day. I'll see you next week.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. All of the time, people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touch their heart or help them stay positive in hard times, or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness. Of how amazing we all really are.
If today's episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those, you know, who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point, and the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.
And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life. If you really understand how to use your mind, you're incredible. And I do want to be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own.
I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You'll want to remember that there's so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore. com slash podcast.
And if you're currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well. Lastly Please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won't want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you'll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you're capable of with your mind.