237 Transcript: Transforming Hidden Patterns: The Healing Power of Perspective

Heal Yourself Change Your Life

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Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore and after recovering from my own life changing injury, it's become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made. that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I'll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.

Let's begin.

Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you. I just love that you are here continuing to expand your mind, your energy, your consciousness, your healing. I just love it. And I love today's episode, just because it highlights some of the challenges that can come up when you're working on healing yourself.

You know, when we stop and think about it for a moment, we know that patterns breed more of the same. You know, we could look at psychology and look at the awareness of reenactments or repetition compulsion or law of attraction or re-victimization or attachment theory or whatever you want to call it. We can see in so many ways.

Patterns can continue to attract and breed more of the same, or it's even written in the Bible where it says, you know, do not conform to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. And so we can literally see patterns written throughout history, you know, throughout psychology and also even in medical studies, we see patterns and the awareness of re victimization.

So the, my point being from this. is that a lot of times it can feel challenging to then need to get out of a pattern and also simultaneously feel like that pattern is getting worse and then also affecting your health. You know, if you think about my situation for a moment, you know, I was in all this extreme pain when which had to do with subconscious fears that I didn't even realize were there.

And as I was injured and going through all of the challenges, my fear went up exponentially. And so it's like the pain or the hurt or the upset can just keep going up even more and more and more, which of course can create more hurt, more fear, more illness, more stress, more hardship, more depression. And so it just gets into this downward spiral.

And so ultimately what we need to do to create a shift in any type of pattern is be willing to change, you know, where we're not blaming the other person. Or the situation we're not angry or blaming or upset towards the situation anymore. And we're also not blaming ourselves, you know, because if I would have just went to blaming myself and my own injury and said, Oh, I have this fear that's upsetting me.

And then I blame myself and then I have more fear. It would have perpetuated the cycle, but instead there is a place where we want to really put our mindset and it's not blaming others and it's not blaming self, but it's ultimately feeling a sense of empowerment. To being willing to change and transform and that is one of the things that I really love about today's episode is we can see the hurt and the upset and the anger and we can see how that is connected to the health issues and then how it's created more hurt and more wounding and this pattern continued from her parents to her exes and you know ex husbands and etc and so you can see the unfoldment, and also you can see that as she starts to change and step into a place of empowerment, that's when her body is able to start letting go of her pain and stiffness, and she's walking easier and all of these things.

So it's just really beautiful. And the insights that come from today's episode are just really profound. Now, if we build on this, by the way, before we step in, we're working with our beautiful volunteer. Anastasia. And when her, when I worked with her, her session was a little under an hour. And so instead of putting it all on one episode, I broke it into two.

And so we actually started with this episode, as you'll recall, on last week's episode 236. So I worked with the first part of this session on episode 236. And as a reminder, When I began working with our volunteer, it was a short episode. And when I began working with her, part of what was coming up for her was that she felt like she could never do things for herself that she always had to do for others and always had to do for others.

And she was stuck in that cycle. And what was beautiful is that as you start to see these patterns, it's liberating. Because that's when it empowers you to be able to, you know, start freeing yourself from them because they're so buried in the subconscious mind that so often we can't see that it's the very thing that's keeping us stuck.

And so what I love about this Last week's episode on episode 236 is that our volunteer was able to gain clarity, and that was the first part of this session. And so as we delve into today's episode, you'll notice we pick up where we left off because this is the second half of the session. But what's beautiful is that as we start to take away that first layer of emotions, That's when we're able to see the next layer, the other emotions that are going on.

And so the additional insight that we're going to be able to see as we step into the second part of her session is just the layers of emotion that goes on, the layers, because as you'll notice when we step in, she's feeling a lot of anger towards her mother, but you'll see as we step in underneath, there's a lot of it that's actually causing that feeling unloved.

And so it just unravels. You'll notice as we step in, there's a lot of emotional patterns that are going on. That are all layered on top of one another that are keeping her from healing herself and connected to her pain and her illness that's going on in her body. So just again, it's very insightful. And so that said, on that note, let's go ahead and jump back in to the second part of our session with beautiful Brandy.

Anastasia. Here we go.

So I want you to notice, if I ask you how much you can find the feeling of feeling like you never get to do something for yourself because you always have to do for others, what would you say? It's true. Okay. Yeah. Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now I'm going to say a couple things for a moment and it's this, um, There's a few things.

So you can see the pattern of feeling like you have to put everybody else first and you can't do anything for yourself and you have to put everybody else first. And then also, like, you love your kids. I see that. And also that you had to raise them all by yourself. And it was overwhelming in front, like a lot of, you can see the overwhelm and all of that, right?

Yes. And that I am not good enough. I haven't been good enough at doing all of this. Uh huh. Exactly. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and, and, exactly, and if I ask you how much as a mom you felt guilty for not doing good enough, for being good enough, for being there enough, how much would you say that is?

Ten. Mm hmm. Ten. Also guilty for breaking with their father.

So, um, um, I take this guilt and responsibility for it. Oh, wait a second. That is not our goal that you take the guilt. You're supposed to do the opposite and get rid of the guilt. Wrong direction. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe. No more taking the guilt. That's not helpful. Watch this. Now, I want you to picture that you spend the rest of your life taking the guilt.

No. Or you just change? I change. That's a much better plan. , how long have you been taking the guilt? For 60 years. Yeah. How's that working out for you? Not good. Not good. ? No, not good. Okay. I'm gonna ask you to breathe and I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to close your eyes, and if I ask you how much your thoughts help create your life, what would you say on that time day?

They are there and all the time. Mm hmm great so I'm gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to notice the Frustration and notice the guilt and notice the part where you feel frustrated and like you can't Be like you can't do things for yourself and you're frustrated and overwhelmed and then guilty for doing things for yourself Notice all of that and I would say don't change it.

Just keep doing the same thing Okay or You could change it, which I'd highly recommend doing. You could change it. You could change it. You could change it. You could change it. And I'm going to ask you to breathe. You could change it. You could change it. And I'm going to ask you to breathe. You could change it.

And I'm going to ask you to breathe. And by the way, if I ask you So there's a couple of things. We're going to talk about the internal. We're going to talk about the practical and the external. Okay? So we're going to talk about a combination. So we just left it. Yep. There's a pattern. We can see it, right?

So, yep, there's a pattern. We can see it. And so I'm going to ask you to breathe, and we're going to talk about the practical. We're also going to talk about the internal and making the changes. So we know that loneliness does affect your health, affect your life, all of these things, right? So if your mother was going to have more friends and more connections, how would she do that?

Now this is the thing. Now I want you to notice the part of you who's frustrated, who says, why doesn't she just connect with other people? She just only wants you or she wants your son or she wants your brother, right? Okay, you know what that tells me? I'm doing the same. Well, Yes, you are but but that's not what I was gonna say.

Alright, so let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I love her self awareness and her self honesty. Now, I also want to point out something that's really profound and it's this, it's that all of the time you'll hear me on these episodes, you'll hear me say that When I'm changing one thing, it really does change other things, but it may not always be obvious.

Okay, and this is one of those moments. And what I want you to notice is this, is that she's upset and judging her mom about always wanting to get everybody else's attention, that she only wants love from the son and from the brother, and she's really mad and upset towards her mom for doing this. And as you notice, she's doing the exact same thing as Gillmore.

she just mentioned. Now, what's beautiful is this, is a lot of times when I'm working on these episodes, I'm trying to not point out things that might make people feel too vulnerable, but trying to just shift the things that, that I could shift basically in the easiest way to help them to get results. And so where I'm going is basically having her not judge her mom, which then as a result will have her not judge herself, which then also helps her to heal.

And so you can see there's actually, there's more layers to this, but the way that I'm working on it would be a less vulnerable way. So I'm just working towards. Having her not judge her mother for her actions, but instead having her change the actions moving forward. And my point from sharing this, I have two points and it's this, number one, when I say on episodes that I'm always working on layers, that I make it look easier than it really is.

That's because I'm always taking the easiest route to get results. And there can be all kinds of layers. And a lot of times that's what I'm doing. I'm thinking, okay, what is the easiest route? Because I want to demonstrate getting results. And so that's one thing. And I always say, you know, when I change one thing, a lot of times it's changing other things that people may not realize.

And that happens all of the time where maybe I shift and I have somebody shift one thing, and really it's shifting six other things. Emotions or six other patterns that are going on that may not be obvious to others. And so that's the first insight that I want to share with you, just because as you've heard, likely at the end of every outro, at the end of every single podcast episode where I say, I make this look really easy, that is because there are invisible things that are going on that, again, I'm basically, the simple way to put it is when I.

have somebody change one thing, a lot of times I'm trying to get one thing that they're changing that's really changing 10 things or six things or, you know, multiple things at the same time. So that's the first insight. The second insight from this is that if we're judging others, it can affect us as well.

And that's exactly what's going on with her. at a deeper level is that, you know, from the feeling of judging her mother, she's also experiencing and doing the same thing. And so it is impacting her as well. So that is key. And of course from that, you'll want to make sure that you're not really ever judging anybody else for the things that they're doing because it can also impact you.

So, that's the key insight here. And again, I just want to acknowledge her beautiful, beautiful self awareness. Just beautiful self awareness, beautiful self honesty. I love it. And on that note, let's go ahead and dive back in with our beautiful volunteer, Anastasia. Here we go.

What I was going to say is, how much does she feel comfortable with other people? Not anymore. Not. So she doesn't feel comfortable, she doesn't feel safe, and she doesn't feel connected to other people. If I ask you, how, and how, how many, how, how far is her distance away? How long, how far away is she? Five minutes.

Five minutes. Okay. So if I ask you, if she were going to start connecting with more people in a positive way, what would she do? She would recover, or you mean practically what she would do? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Go out, meet people, invite them, talk over the phone. Okay. Now, if I ask you, does she like to play games?

No. Oh, okay. So, what about like a senior living place? Would she be willing to go into a senior living place? No. Okay. So, and how long ago, how long has it been since she's been out and about walking and doing things? Two years. It will be two years in spring. Okay. And out of curiosity, does she have the physical ability to walk around?

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Physically, she's perfect. Physically, she's perfect. Yeah. Okay. So what would happen What if you guys started taking her places and you said, let's go to the, let's go out to the park or let's go for a walk or let's go here or let's go there. So what if even, because if you only go and you only see her in her house and you only see her in her house, then her world gets smaller.

Does that make sense? Yeah. She will. She, she goes out for walks. Okay. With somebody. Yeah. With somebody. Okay. So if you purposely started taking her out, if, if you guys, maybe your son or, or your brother started purposely taking her out more to connect with other people, to play cards at a card game or different things like that.

But if you purposely started getting her to do more things out of the house, would that be good for her? Yes or no? Yes. But she refuses. Yes, it is. Okay? So let's do this. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I want you to notice beyond her, I want you to notice you have a pattern. And I want you to notice you have a pattern of feeling guilty or feeling like you're doing the wrong thing and not showing up for somebody, blah, blah, blah.

You can see that whole pattern, right? Yeah. Okay. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. Bingo. And I'm going to ask you just for a moment to notice the part of you. Um, if I ask you zero to ten, how much would you say you've been good at relationships in your life, what would you say? Um, I don't know.

I've been trying very hard. Okay, but if I ask you zero to ten, how much you've been good at relationships? Zero to ten, what level would you give yourself? So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and if I ask you how much you felt angry in relationships, what would you say? Hurt. Time. Mm hmm.

Okay. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe,

and if I ask you just for a moment, give me one second. Alright, so let's do this. At. Dad. Bingo. So I want you to notice how angry you are at your mother for being in that state that she's in. And I'm going to ask you just for a moment to have compassion.

Now basically what your mom is saying is she's saying, I want to be loved. What a horrible person, right?

She's wanting to be loved and she's feeling depressed because she's not feeling loved. And she's probably also looking at her life and 87 and having a hard time getting herself out of depression and feeling alone and feeling unloved. Right? What a horrible person. I can't believe her. So now she wants love.

Wow. I didn't get much love from her. So, uh huh. So I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe. Now notice for a moment I want you to notice the part of you who's angry at her and notice the part who feels like you didn't get much love from your ex husband, your, your other relationships either, right?

You see it? Mm hmm. So I'm gonna ask you just for a moment to breathe. Now, by the way, would you say your mom is not a very loving person? Mm hmm. She's trying to be. Ah, okay. She's trying to be. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And are you trying to be good at being loving also? Yes. And how angry are you at her right now?

It's uh, it's not as bad as it used to be. It's not as, yeah. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Okay. So I want you to notice a level of pain in your neck, zero to 10. What's your level? Seven, eight. Mm hmm. So I'm going to ask you to breathe and I'm going to ask you just for a moment to notice the part of you that is so annoyed and frustrated and angry at her.

And I'm going to ask you to breathe. Zero to ten. How much would you say she's abusive? Ten. Okay. Ten. And how, how is she abusing? She is abusing by making everybody feel bad all the time, and dirty. She never says anything good to anybody. Okay. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe, and by the way, what would happen if you saw her You just said something like, um, you know, you just said something like, if she's being mean or upset, you just said, well, kindly, please don't talk to me like that.

Be nice. Just be kind. What would happen? I've tried. Okay, so I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. Now I want you to notice for a moment. Ready? Yeah. If I ask you to think about your pattern, you see your pattern, right? Yes. Okay. Good.

Notice, for a moment, how stuck you are in your pattern. Mm hmm. So, I'm going to ask you just for a moment again. So watch this. Is if you said, Brandy, what would happen tomorrow if you went outside? And I said, I've already tried. Did I, did I answer your question or did I not answer your question? You didn't answer.

It didn't answer the question. So I keep asking you questions that you're not answering. Okay? Now, the way that I work is I need your brain to move forward in any direction. Mm hmm. But every time I ask it to move forward, you move backwards. You say, but I tried. You said, Brandy, what would happen next year if the sun came out?

And I said, well, it did ten years, ten, ten, five years ago. Like, well, wait a second. I'm trying to talk about the future. You're trying to talk about the past. You mentioned the future. I mentioned the past. You see what I'm talking about? Yeah. Okay, so I'm gonna ask you to breathe. I'm gonna try that again. So what would happen if next time, if she's being upset, if you kindly, calmly, respectfully said, I love you, and please don't talk to me that way.

What would happen? I would try. Okay, now what would happen? So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. Now, what I want you to notice is anytime you've ever said it, you've been upset or mean or hurt or frustrated also. Can you see that? Yes. There's a difference. If you're triggering somebody, if they're triggered and you're triggered and they're triggered, but when you're just kind and, and you just speak to it, you can change it.

Does that make sense? Yes. Okay. Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. So let's do this. So I'm going to ask you to stand up and walk around and just notice the level of stiffness again. And, uh, between two and three. So it's way down? Yeah. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Okay, so I'm going to ask you to take in the feeling that you're willing to change.

I'm going to ask you to take in the feeling that you're willing to change. That instead of getting upset and triggered by your mother, that you can just calmly respond and not get all triggered and upset with her. But you can just respond calm and that you can do that. How does that feel to you?

Peaceful. What? Peaceful. I like that. Take that in. So, if she's upset or she's whatever, you can respond kindly, you can respond nicely and just say, you know what, I love you and please don't talk to me that way. Can we just talk in a different way please? Please be kind. So I'm going to ask you to breathe.

Can you do that and not feel triggered? Yeah. What? Yeah. What? Yes. Great. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. Now if I ask you to notice the level of pain in your neck, zero to ten, what's your level? Uh, six. Six. That's what I would have said, about a five six, right in there. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe.

So just come down a little bit, okay? So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And now I want you to notice the part of you that's angry at her. Also want you to notice the part of you that was angry at your kid's fathers. Can you see that? How angry? Very. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And if I ask you, are you willing to let go of your anger?

Yes. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I'm going to ask you just for a moment to take in the feeling that you don't have to blame yourself. Don't blame yourself. But I want you to be empowered. So notice the part of you that feels like a victim. Can you see that? Yes. Yeah. And I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I'm going to ask you just for a moment to notice the part of you that feels like a victim.

Now, if you knew you were empowered to change it, how much would you feel like a victim? None. Okay, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. So if you knew that you could change it, how long would you keep getting angry, upset, and pissed off, and all these things, or would you just decide that you're going to want to change that?

I want to change all of that. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Okay? And I'm going to ask you, by the way, to notice, uh, can you give me your brother's, uh, first initial please? S. Bingo. Okay, and, uh, bingo. And if I ask you to notice the part of you that's upset also with your brother, can you see that?

Oh yeah. Mmhm. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I'm going to ask you, do you want to keep being upset with your brother, or are you okay, are you ready to be done with that? I'm ready to stop doing that. So I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe. And I want you to notice what it feels like to feel empowered, to stop being mad at everybody else and everybody else and stop blaming everybody else and everybody else, including yourself.

Don't blame yourself, but that you're willing to change.

All right. So let's go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first and foremost, I love her self awareness. I love her self honesty. Just beautiful. And in this moment right now, we're talking about, you know, don't blame others. And don't blame yourself. When we stop and really think about the big picture, you know, this pattern for her started at a very young age with her mother.

And we can see how the pattern has continued. You know, she's talked about, she has two kids from two different fathers, and then she feels guilty because it didn't work out, but she never felt loved by them. And then there's all this hurt. So she has this ongoing pattern of feeling hurt with her mother.

and Unloved and Anger that she's also had with the men throughout her life and now here it is again still with her mother. And so this is the problem when you stop and look at it, is that here she is, she's had this pattern going on They create so much hurt and anger and blame and frustration and feeling unloved, which is a painful pattern, especially considering that we as human beings, we need love.

We need attention. We need connection. And so not only is it emotionally painful, yes, it's very emotionally painful, but it's also painful. Something we need. So our soul craves love. And so when you stop and think about the depth of pain that can come from a pattern like this, it's, it's harsh, you know, and then when you think about stepping into empowerment to change it, that is a little tricky because you also don't want to blame yourself either.

And that's where we are in this moment is saying, okay, but don't blame yourself. And then when you stop and think about it, also, if we think about last week's episode where we started, you know, that first part of the session with her, where we started in and she's always feeling like she also has to do everything for others.

And, um, and that she never has time to be able to take care of herself. You can see how there can be so much hurt on top of not feeling loved. And then it just gets into the spiral that feels hard to get out of. Now what's beautiful is that as we're untangling this, she can see the layers, which brings her into a state of empowerment.

We ended with the comment right here that we said, don't blame yourself, because what will happen from this place is that some people would then want to go into blaming themselves. You know, Oh, well, this is my fault and I did it and I can see the pattern and et cetera, yada, yada, yada, which of course, would just keep them stuck.

You know, none of us put patterns in our subconscious mind on purpose, so we don't want to blame ourselves. But then some people are so stuck into not blaming themselves that they want to keep blaming others and keep blaming others. And then that becomes a cycle too, where people blame themselves and then blame others.

Instead, the sweet spot, or the healing spot, if you will, is the is a state of empowerment, of not needing to blame self, of not needing to blame others, but instead to gain clarity as to what is going on and being willing to understand and transform those patterns. Because that is key as well. Because what's also happening, as you can see from this, is that she's had all these feelings of hurt and unloved and anger and And notice, she even says that a lot of it's stemming from her, so she's aware of that.

And then, because she's so hurt by her mom and feeling unloved by her mom, she also doesn't want to go to her mom's house anymore, which is also perpetuating the problem and feeling more unloved. Because it's like when somebody gets upset and they get angry or hurt, and then on an unconscious level. They can perpetuate the problem because they have all this hurt and then they don't want to connect and then now they're feeling more unloved and it becomes this unconscious cycle.

And this is what I call the emotion consciousness cycle where our hurt can then perpetuate more anger or more upset that then perpetuates unhappiness. Actions, unconscious actions that then can perpetuate the problem. And then we just end up staying in this cycle until we're willing to really step out of it and start seeing the patterns or unconscious actions and whatnot, and, and being able to transform it.

And that is when you really step into a place of pure empowerment. And so that's where we're going. As we step back in with our beautiful volunteer. Anastasia. Here we go.

You're willing to change, to let go of the hurt, the upset, the frustration, the pissed off and the blame towards everybody else. The blame is not helping. It's not helping, so I'm going to ask you to breathe, and if I ask you what it would look like to have a great relationship with your brother, would you want that?

Yeah. Really? Yeah. Great. Notice your smile, that's a good thing. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Bingo. And I'm going to ask you to notice the level on your neck. Zero to ten, what's your level? Four. Okay. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Bingo. So I would have said three, so we're tracking right there.

Great. So it's coming down, right? Yes. But that would mean you would have to actually change. That would mean Now I'm going to ask you just for a moment to think about this. What would it look like if you were laughing with your brother and connecting? and you felt loved and you were connecting and laughing and feeling good and you really felt connected to him and you guys were laughing and enjoying and connecting.

What would that even look like if you let go of your anger and really started connecting even more? It would be great. What? Great. I would love it. Okay, so are you willing to change? Yes. I'm willing to change. Okay. So I want you just for a moment to notice that your relationships aren't an area that you've mastered in life.

Would you say that's true? Yes. Yeah. Okay. So if I ask you if you're willing to change to improve that, what would you say? That would be great. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe and I'm going to ask you to close your eyes. And I'm going to ask you to take in the feeling that you would have to let go of the anger and the blame and the upset and pointing the finger at everybody else and you'd have to be willing to change you.

So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now by the way, if you give me your son's initial, what's your son's initial? Bingo. Now, if I ask you how much there's a part of you who feels jealous that he's going to visit your mom all the time, uh, how much would you say that is? None. Zero. Zero. I'm sorry for him.

Bingo. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe. There's a feeling of feeling like it's not fair that she's asking for attention and that you want more attention from them. Can you see that? Yeah. Okay. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe. Breathe. And I want you to notice that feeling of feeling like it's not fair that she's asking attention and you want more attention from them.

You see it? A little bit. If I ask you zero to 10, how much you're wanting more love and attention from your son, what would you say? 10. Mm hmm.

Someone asked you to breathe. What if it looked like instead, what if your son was going to your mom's house? And you said, why don't we all play a game together? Or why don't we all do this together? And so instead of being upset, you made it a point to go laugh and connect or play a game or whatever, whenever he was going to, and then it felt like fun and felt like connecting and felt good.

What would that feel like? Good. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. What's your level in your neck? Zero to ten. Two. 22. Great, so I'm going to ask you to breathe, think about just for a moment inside, I've asked you to let go of anger and how you can make this an opportunity to connect with your son and even with your brother and say, okay, well look, what if we just had fun doing this?

What if we actually had fun? What if we played card games? What if we connected? What if we watched a movie together? What if we'd like, now, by the way, if I ask you. What if you started doing that with your son? You said, let me know when you're, let's make a plan to go to your mom's house and, and let's watch a movie or let's all go for a walk together, or let's all play cards together or let's all do that.

How would that feel? Good. What? Ideal. Idea. Idea? Ideal. Good. Ideal. Okay, great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And now would you want to go to your mom's more? Okay. I see your smile.

So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now how much of a change is this for you? Would be a big change, and I would like to change. Oh, I like that. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now by the way, if you were good at saying, oh hey, let's just play cards, or let's all go for a walk, or let's all go to a walk to a cafe, or Let's all, uh, go and, and watch a film, or let's do this together, and, and you started making it something that was fun.

Do you think that would be good for your mom? Yes. Do you think it would be good for you? Yes. Do you think it would be good for your son? Yes, it would be good for everybody. Oh. Oh, okay. So don't do that. Just stay angry. I'm going to ask you just for a moment to breathe, and I want you to notice the feeling of hurt.

And how much would you rather keep all of that? I don't want to keep it. What? I don't want to keep it. Real change? Yes. Great. I'm going to ask you to breathe. And now if I ask you, are you really going to follow through? Like you really say, okay, after this call, you say, okay, look it, I'm going to call my son and I'm going to make a plan and we're going to do something fun and we're going to start planning fun into the equation.

We're going to start making fun and enjoying it and having fun and that you actually follow through. Are you really going to do that? Yes or no? Yes. And a percent? Yes, I will. Great, so I'm going to ask you to breathe. I want you to notice a level of pain in your neck. What's your level? It's almost gone.

What? Almost gone. Oh, so you're getting rid of it? Ha ha. Okay, great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe and I want to invite you to stand up and walk around.

No, it's easier. Ah, so it's easier and how stiff are you feeling? A little bit stiff, but I could help. I can move better. A little bit better or a lot better? A lot better. Great. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And how freaking amazing are you? Is that the question? This is the question. And I expect nothing less than a level 10.

Okay. 10. 10. Great. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. I'm gonna ask one more time. How amazing are you? I am amazing. Great. Zero to ten. And I expect nothing less than an eleven. I am very amazing. Great. So I'm gonna ask you to breathe. So if I ask you tomorrow how much you want to go in back into a place of feeling angry and negative, No, if I ask you today, tomorrow, how much you want to say, okay, I'm gonna change.

I'm gonna start creating fun and Making a plan and getting people together and doing things like okay Well, let me make a plan to do this and let me make a plan to do that and where you actually do that What does that look like? What does that feel like? Great. Yeah, what great? amazing Amazing. So, if I ask you, is that a little change for you or a big change for you?

A big change. Great. An enormous change. Yeah. An enormous change. So, I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I'm going to ask you to take that in, and I'm going to ask you, if you think about, if you started doing things or going out to a cafe or going out to a restaurant or going to a movie or, or playing a game or doing things like that, do you think that that would also be good for her mindset?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. Now I want to say one other thing that, um, Universe is asking me to say, and it's this. When you're 87, how much do you want your son to come visit you? I would, yeah, I want, I would probably love it. So don't train him to feel bad that he has to go visit his 87 year old grandmother because then what happens when you turn 87?

How much is he gonna say in his programming? Oh, I shouldn't have to do this to go see my mom. You see what you're programming him for? What if instead he has the programming in his mind that says, it's fun to go visit my grandmother. We have an amazing time. It's great to spend time with family. We laugh.

We have a great time. It's so blissful. And then when you're 87, you guys are out doing fun things and having a great time. And, and he says, Oh, this is so fun and wonderful. And, and you, and he's programmed already. You guys are going to have a great time and you're doing lovely things. Then how does life look like when you're 87?

You don't feel sorry for him that he has to go visit your grandmother. Make it fun. You see the difference? How important do you think that shift is? Very important. Very important. Yep, very. So I'm going to ask you to breathe, and I want you to notice the level of pain in your neck. Zero to ten, what's your level?

One. Okay, so now I want you to notice the level of stiffness. What's your level of stiffness? It's, uh, it's perhaps gone. What's your level of stiffness? One. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. And you've got to make this change for real. Like in other words, it takes real change to really transform. So then what I want you to start transforming is I want you to start transforming the feeling of anger and feeling unloved and blah, blah, blah, and instead you're taking things, moving them forward.

But you're also, I want you to let go of the negativity as well. Right? Yeah. Beautiful. So if I ask you, how'd you do with your energy? It's better. It's better. Higher. Higher. Okay. So I'm going to ask you to breathe. So better energy. Okay. And so I want to invite you, as we wrap up, I want to invite you to think about what you want this, like the changes that you're going to make, and I want you to write them down.

So I want you to, of course, listen to this recording, but I also want to invite you to think about the changes and the way that you're going to connect moving forward with your son, with your brother, with your mother, and start thinking about that. You say, okay, look. I'm going to get even better at relationships and I'm really going to change and I'm going to get even better and, and then you're starting to do that and to make real changes.

Does that sound good? Yes. That's the plan. Beautiful. And you're going to follow through? Yes. I haven't. Beautiful. Beautiful. Not only that, but I have a question. When we started, you said you were afraid of your future and what that would look like and things getting worse and worse and worse and worse, right?

Yes. Absolutely. Now, if I ask you, do you see things getting worse and worse and worse or better and better and better right now? What do you see? I see things getting better. Right. Now, if you think about following through with this plan, do you see things getting a little bit better or a lot better? A lot better.

Right. And that's beautiful. Fantastic. Fantastic. Okay? Yes. Beautiful. And, uh, Bingo. It has been such a pleasure connecting with you, and you're just, you're beautiful and I'd love to see you. Make sure to follow through and get this in, okay? Thank you very much. Thank you, Brandy. You are absolutely so, so welcome, beautiful.

So, so welcome.

All right. So let's go ahead and unpack this just a bit more. And before we do, I just have to say what a beautiful job with our volunteer. I mean, she just did so great, great self awareness, great self honesty, great job with her paint. I mean, taking it from a level eight, nine down to a one or less. And being able to walk around even easier, you know, huge shift, you know, to think that our minds are this incredible is amazing.

When you think about, you know, the awareness that there are 1. 5 billion people who live in pain and the awareness that we really can use our minds in a very counterintuitive way, if you will, but use our minds to release. The pain and create that shift is just incredible. Now, of course it does take real follow through, but that of course is the gift.

You know, when we stop and think about it for a moment, for her to go from a place of feeling angry and upset and hurt and unloved and stressed and hurt and in all this pain to then saying, okay, well. She's willing to start changing to actually make it fun to connect with her son and her brother and her mom and start making it fun and being willing to create that shift.

That's a big change. And you know, there's so many insights from this episode. One of which is just the awareness that our unconscious actions and behavior can actually perpetuate the problem. You know, here she was feeling left out and lonely and unloved. And simultaneously, you know, it's hard to love somebody when they're in this deep, deep big state of anger.

You know, if somebody's really, really angry and hurt and upset with you, how easy is it for you to love them? A lot of times it's not. It can be harder and harder. And so if you think about it being in the state of anger and upset and frustration and then, and hurt, and then also not wanting to go to her mom's because she's feeling so unloved, you know, again, it just perpetuates the problem.

And so these unconscious actions can do exactly that. But when we're willing to not blame others, not blame self, but instead create that shift and be willing to change, be willing to radically feel differently, that's when we can heal ourselves truly. You know, and so that's what I love. I love her self awareness.

I love her self honesty. Just beautiful. Now, this is the thing you'll want to remember is this, is that all of the time people will say something in a marriage like, you know, should I leave the relationship or should I stay? And, you know, when we stop and think about it, when we change ourselves in the inside, You know, when we really change on the inside, that's when we know, it's like, we'll, we'll take the action towards what it is that we want.

So notice in her case, she felt like it would be fun to actually get together with her son and her brother and her mother. And she felt like that would be really good. She really felt like that would be fun to do. Now, in other cases, if a person is. Really, you know, let's say her mother was, you know, screaming at her and, you know, in that case, what she'd want to do is instead make a plan to be loving and connecting with just her son, or her brother, or another husband, but this time instead of manifesting another Husband that's the same, and having the unloved anger, uh, hurt, you know, pattern continue to manifest a relationship that is beautiful with a wonderful man that creates a loving connecting relationship.

And so the point being is that. As you change these patterns, that's ultimately what you'd want. You'd either want to change your specific situation and start showing up in a different way in that situation itself, or as you change the pattern, maybe you leave the negative situation altogether and then start manifesting a pattern that is full of love and happiness and harmony.

So whatever that is in your situation, but what we can see from this is that patterns can repeat themselves over and over, as we see with her ex husbands, and you know, that it's just perpetuated throughout her life. And so what we can see is just the awareness that all change really does start from within.

And so taking that feeling of personal empowerment is so crucial to healing, transformation, love, connection, all of it. And so again, I just love this episode. I love our volunteer. I love her awareness, just so good. And as always, I'm going to ask you to please do make a point to hit the share button on this episode.

You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don't even know, because the more happy and healthy and empowered that every single person is in our world. The better this world is for all of us. And so please do make a point to hit the share button and please do make a point to have a most wonderful, loving, happy, healthy rest of your day.

And I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We'll see you there.

Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope, or touched their heart, or helped them stay positive in hard times, or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness. Of how amazing we all really are.

If today's episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about, or those you know, who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone.

What we are all capable of. And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming, to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life, if you really understand how to use your mind, you're incredible, and I do want to be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own.

I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You'll want to remember that there's so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore.com/podcast.

And if you're currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well. Lastly. Please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won't want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you'll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you're capable of with your mind.

Thank you.

 

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Also, please remember that genuine change and follow through are key for self-healing results. If you struggle with negative thoughts or have a chronic health issue or chronic pain, please do not avoid seeing your doctor.

Instead, your goal with self-healing should be to continue to see your doctor as recommended and blow their mind with what you are capable of with your mind and with the power of mind-body healing.  Please enjoy this self-healing podcast!