[00:00:00] Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I’ll even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind, and then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Let’s begin.
[00:01:00] Hello and happy, beautiful day to you. Welcome back. On today’s episode, I wanna share with you tricky patterns that can affect your health, your life, your success, your happiness, your relationships. Basically, I wanna share with you the way that patterns can show up where they’re kind of sneaky. The reason basically that they’re so hard to identify and why they can be so hidden.
And part of the reason I wanna share this is if you think about past episodes, all of the time when I’m working with people, I’m helping them to identify patterns and literally heal themselves or release pain, or release hurt, or create radical shifts in their health, their happiness, their life, their success, their relationships—everything—by understanding the patterns in their mind.
And so often you’ll [00:02:00] notice when I work with people that they’re surprised about the pattern. They go, “Oh my God,” like, they didn’t even see it. And I get it. That was my situation. Like I really had to understand how to work with my mind and see the mind in a different way. And so today, basically what I wanna do is I wanna share with you an example of how a pattern can work to affect your success, your health, your happiness, your joy, your life, and your healing.
The Pattern of Superiority as a Defense Mechanism
And so I’m gonna give you a simple example to kind of just start with. Part of where this example comes from is a man that I recently met who had multiple health issues. He also had issues going on with his success and his happiness—just basically his life. He got into a really hard spot.
And part of it had to do with a pattern. We’re gonna—I’m gonna share it with you. So let’s keep it simple. Here we go.
Starting with the basics, going back [00:03:00] to his childhood—and we’ll call this man Mark, okay? A wonderful, wonderful gentleman. But long story short, he had this feeling of basically feeling rejected, picked on, kind of not good enough as a child. And what happened, the way he dealt with it, was with a feeling of superiority, like, “I’m gonna be better than you.”
And a way to think about it is like this: maybe you’ve heard before that, let’s say a child gets left out—maybe a child feels left out from a group—and a loving adult comes by and says something like, “Don’t worry, they’re just jealous. You’re better than they are.”
And so what happens? It’s at that point that, you know, as the child’s feeling rejected, they then also had this reinforcement of feeling like, “Well, you’re just better than they are.” And so what happened is he had this linked up. He had all of this underlying wounding of feeling rejected and hurt, and then simultaneously this feeling that says, “Okay, well I need to do something superior and better.”
So what he did—because this was a lot of pain in his relationships—was he really started excelling and working hard toward success. In his definition—and everybody defines success differently—but for him at this time, success meant business success. It meant money. It meant having a lot of things. That’s what it meant at the time.
So basically that’s what he did. He excelled big time at that.
Now, as Mark continued to excel, one of the things he got into was building a really big marketing company. He started doing marketing, and long story short, he was really, really good at it.
But what he started doing also then was he would over-market companies. So instead of just marketing their existing strengths, he wanted to make sure they sold really well, right? Because that’s what he did—marketing. But the problem was, it wasn’t quite in integrity. So meaning, let’s say a business provides a certain level or quality, and his job was to do excellent marketing. So he would kind of over-promise, and that created an integrity issue.
So here he was in his success, and what ended up happening is he had all of this fear and all of this stress, and then all of these struggles. Because when we have a lot of integrity issues in the things we’re doing, it can create obstacles—which came up. So he started having one problem after another problem after another, to the point where basically everything started tumbling down.
Now what then happened—because remember, we’re talking about the superiority pattern here—is that he also lost his way to feel superior, right? Because he had all this relationship hurt. So then his superiority was in business, in success, in all of that. And he lost it. So basically, he really had all of this wounding, all of this struggle, because that was the way he was maintaining his emotional balance, if you will.
And so what ultimately happened is he hit this horrible rock bottom.
Spiritual Bypassing: When Healing Becomes a New Superiority
The issue is this: he then found spirituality, which is a good thing. But what he then did was put another bandaid on it. The pattern changed in a different way. Because he had lost all the success, so what do you think happened?
The pattern was then—he became spiritual, and now he was better than success. So he would say things like, “I can’t believe I ever fell into that trap of wanting physical, material objects.” Now why? Because there was all of that hurt and wounding toward material objects, because he lost it. So then the problem was, now his mind thinks it is doing the solution.
That’s what his mind thought—it was doing the solution. Now he was spiritual, from a place of being righteous about it.
Now let me unpack this even more. Let’s say that he went into spirituality and had simply said, “You know what? Material objects just aren’t for me. That’s not really what I care about so much.” Fantastic. But his energy had a huge feeling of righteousness and superiority.
He was like, “I can’t believe I ever fell for that. Anybody who wants to have a house, or this, or that”—he was very much speaking down about it and poorly about it from a place of what? From a place of wounding and righteousness.
So the pattern continued. Now, of course, how do you think he felt in himself? He felt a feeling of righteous, superior—he went back to that same pattern. Now what then happens is it continues to show up in different ways.
So my point is, what can happen is sometimes these patterns that people feel like are the solution end up just covering the underlying hurt. And the problem is, ultimately in working with Mark, what did we need to fix? The righteousness, the superiority, and also the underlying wounding that it was covering.
And so what can happen is, the problem is, when a person feels a sense of righteousness or superiority, they may not always want to give it up. So it can be tricky. These patterns can end up showing up in multiple ways in life where it seemingly has nothing to do with something from the past but then continues to show up in a different variety of ways that can even feel positive.
[00:09:00] Then further, the problem became this: the more Mark felt this sense of righteousness over money and felt like money was bad, horrible, corrupt—that’s how he felt—the more he was also pushing it away from him. So then what happened? He had a lot of stress, financial stress, and fear that he was constantly struggling with. And he was blocking himself from having money.
So then he’s struggling. One struggle after another, after another. So part of his brain is saying, “It’s righteous. It’s good. I shouldn’t have money. That’s a good thing.” And the other part of his mind is saying, “I’m stressed. I don’t have enough to get by. I’m in fear. What am I gonna do?”
So then he was dealing with both of those—which then basically, he was struggling. And then it started affecting his health because now he had all of this underlying fear of how he was going to support himself and he felt stuck.
Redefining Success and Emotional Balance
Ultimately, I see all the time where people have patterns that keep them stuck. Now a few things. Number one is this: as far as money or success—and again, success is however you define it—what I like to define success as is having an ambition for something in life and feeling optimistic about it, whatever that is.
When we have this balance of whatever it is—it could be towards a relationship, towards a nonprofit, towards a for-profit—success to me is being happy and feeling like you’re moving toward something in a happy, positive way.
Because like if you think about a tree, a tree successfully growing is doing what? It’s growing. It’s flourishing. So we can be a tree at any stage, like a two-foot tree, and it can be successful in its life because it’s continuing to grow and develop and continue to grow towards what it wants to grow towards.
And so similarly in our lives, when we are in a place where we are happy and have something to look forward to and are continuing to grow—to me that’s the definition of success, wherever you are. But either way, you can define success for whatever that is for you.
But in this place of looking at money and wealth and whatnot, we want to have good relationships in life toward anything we’re doing: a good relationship toward our world, toward the planet, toward people, toward money, toward a house—toward anything. A positive relationship where we’re not harboring negativity or righteousness or superiority or anger or hurt toward anything.
And so often, people end up putting layers and layers of emotions on top of wounding and hurt that then keeps them stuck.
And so, I know this may or may not sound a bit complex to you, but my hope is that you can take an insight from this. Maybe from this what you take is the awareness that these patterns can be really sneaky, and they can show up in different ways. And our minds can suppress what’s really going on.
So maybe from this, what you’re taking is you’re looking at the awareness that hurt can be underlying, and we can put righteousness or superiority or a spiritual bandaid on it, if you will—but really, ultimately, be hiding the problem that’s affecting your health, your life, your happiness, your joy, your flow, your success—whatever that is for you.
So maybe that’s one insight. Or maybe another insight is this: maybe you’re holding onto anger toward money or success or something like that. And instead of being angry with it, you can kindly feel like it’s not your thing. Like me personally—I don’t have anything against skateboarding, but it’s not my thing. I don’t skateboard. I’m not mad at it. I’m not upset at it. I’m not angry at it. It’s just not my thing.
So, if Mark had basically said, “Look, I’m not mad at it, I don’t hate it, it’s just not my thing,”—great. But instead he was like, “Oh, I can’t believe I did that. It’s horrible. It’s corrupt.”
Money’s not horrible or corrupt. Don’t get me wrong, people don’t always use it in the right ways—but that’s true with anything. People don’t always use a lot of things in the right ways. And it’s not a criticism or a judgment, but either way, point being—maybe that’s the insight you take. Maybe your relationship with money isn’t where you want it to be.
Or maybe you’ve done something similar to what Mark did—maybe you’ve had some hurt, and there’s some righteousness or superiority or a spiritual “bandaid” over top of it.
Or maybe you have patterns in your life and you’re looking at this and going, “Oh, I see the way patterns are going and how they can show up in completely different ways,” and maybe that’s it.
Or maybe—by the way—maybe you are using spirituality as a way of feeling righteous and superior over others, which is typically covering up some type of wounding or hurt or pattern or something. And so maybe that’s what you wanna change.
Basically, my goal is to just open your mind—to share with you how these patterns can show up, and also to help you to be able to see if there’s something you could change here to better improve your health, your happiness, your relationships, your life, and to create that transformation.
Healing Is Possible: Free Resources and Next Steps
So that’s today’s quick IQ episode. And of course, by the way, if you are somebody who is working on healing yourself, I do have a free training—a 90-minute training—that can help you to really understand even deeper how healing works with the mind at a deeper, deeper level. So there is that.
And of course, I also have programs and video courses and workshops and whatnot. My biggest, biggest goal is that I want everybody to get results—to change their life. And I know what it feels like to be struggling, to want to heal myself, to want to change my life—and to struggle for years and years and years just to get results.
I know what that feels like. And of course, that’s my goal—to help you to be able to get those results.
So on that note, if you need any assistance, any support, please do reach out to me or my team.
And also, if you could please hit the share button on this episode—share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or even somebody you don’t know. Because the more that every single person in our world is happy and healthy and loved and loving, the better this world is for all of us.
So please do make a point to hit the share button on this episode. And please do make a point to have the most wonderful, incredible rest of your day. And I look forward to seeing you in the next episode.
[00:16:00] Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life.
All the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope, touched their heart, helped them stay positive in hard times, or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are.
If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really need it.
As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations: to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.
And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming and maintain their results. But the point is—for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand how to use your mind.
You are incredible.
And I do want to be clear, though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You’ll want to remember that there’s so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize.
That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore.com/podcast.
And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you’ll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind. Thank you.
