Welcome to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. I’m Brandy Gillmore and what I’m most known for is helping people to create radical transformations and even demonstrating the power of the mind and self-healing under medical equipment so you can see the results and my work has even been published in a medical journal because it’s truly incredible what we are all capable of when we understand our own minds at a deeper level.
So whether you’re new to this work or you’ve been studying the power of the mind for many years, I love that you are here. I love that we’re on this incredible journey together, and I look forward to sharing breakthrough information with you. That said, on this podcast, I’ll share two types of episodes.
First, self-healing episodes, where I share key insights from working with live volunteers. And the second type are where I answer questions from the audience. That said, if you’d like to volunteer or submit a question, come visit me at BrandyGillmore.com. On that note, let’s dive in.
Hello and welcome to this week’s quick IQ episode where we’re going to talk about happiness. All too often people struggle to really feel genuinely happy, and there are specific things that happen in the mind that can make it really hard to feel happy. And so that’s what we’re going to talk about today, is those specific things that do make it more challenging to stay happy, and also a few things that you can do to start really creating that shift.
So first and foremost, I want to start by defining happiness because I have to say, prior to my injury, I felt like I was a happy person. I was doing network engineering and operations. I loved what I did. I was really good at it, and I felt I was just normal, I wasn’t crying every day, I wasn’t upset every day, so I felt like I was happy, and that used to be my definition for happy was, absence of major negative emotions. But what I didn’t realize at the time is that happy is like this positive glow, this glow on the inside that you just have as you’re walking around and just feeling that.
And I didn’t really have that glow previously. sure, I had moments where I was happy and I could hang out with friends and have a good time and laugh and I, enjoyed what I did and I enjoyed when I was working. I really enjoyed what I was doing. I enjoyed so many things in my day, and so I had a feeling of enjoying tasks and enjoying the things I was doing, and yet, happiness is still beyond that.
it’s this feeling of just glowing on the inside just because not just because you’re doing things that you enjoy or because you are avoiding the negative, to just focus on something that feels good, but that state of being just genuinely happy for no reason, just because you feel good and you feel amazing on the inside.
That to me is happy. And again, prior to my injury, I would’ve told you that I was happy, but now it’s just a completely different level. And all of the time I get messages or emails from people who have been through my courses who are literally sending in messages saying, things like, this is the first time in my life I’ve ever truly felt happy.
And it’s like an awakening for people of, a new awareness, of a new level, of experiencing what happiness really is. And so I love that and that’s what I really want to talk about today, because all too often people will say things like, yes, I’m stressed, that’s because there’s so much going on in the world, and I get it.
I completely understand. But you’ll want to remember that happiness really truly is an inside job and that all of the time people will say to me, Brandy, of course you’re so happy you got your life back. And I always say, no, of course I got my life back because I’m so happy. Like it took, of course, more than being happy, I had to understand my mind programming and what specific things I needed to change in my mind, but literally at the worst part and the hardest, most difficult part of my entire life is when I really began to master my mind and happiness. And so if you are somebody who is going through a hard time right now, or is feeling really stressed about things that are going on in our world, then you’ll want to remember that above all happiness is an inside job.
And all of the time I see people who are going through a very challenging time in their lives, who then, start working on healing themselves and mastering their mind, and they’re able to make that transformation as well. So it’s not just me who’s capable of this. We are all truly incredible beings and we’re all capable of really making the transformation no matter what’s going on in our lives. If we remember that happiness is an inside job and that it has to start from the inside. And so on that note, I want to talk about the top five specific reasons that happiness can feel really hard. And then we’ll talk about some positive things that you can do in your life.
And by the way, hint, hint, after we go through these five things, I am going to mention that if you notice yourself doing any of these things, that I’d recommend changing them. So that’s one of the solutions ahead of time. So just as we go through these five things, I want you to listen with an open mind and make sure not to judge yourself.
So if there is something that comes up that you are doing, you’ll want to just notice it and then decide if you want to change it in your life. Alright, so that said, here we go. Number five on the countdown is, whatever you put into your mind, it gets programmed in. So in other words, if somebody programs their mind to learn English, they’ll learn the English language.
If somebody programs their mind to learn Mandarin or Japanese, then of course that’s what they’ll learn. Now the same is true with emotions. And if you think about it for a moment, a lot of people have an easier time stewing on the negative. This happened or that happened, or feeling upset or feeling guilty about something or bad about something.
And so there can be all of those negative emotions over and over and over brought in. And when it comes to bringing in the positive things, a lot of times people don’t bring those in as much. And so of course something that you would want to do is when you get into those negative states, is making sure that you’re not stewing on what so and so did, or this person did, or this happened, or guilt or whatever it is, but you want to specifically make sure to not camp out in the negative. And when something great happens or positive happens, you want to make sure to just simply stew on that in a positive way. Bring that in and feel it. And that in and of itself can help you to start making a transformation in your mind from negative to the positive. So that’s one thing.
And moving on, on the countdown to number four, this one goes a bit deeper in the mind, where we look at things like triggers. When you have negative triggers that are in your subconscious mind where you have, this thing or that thing can make you feel emotional. Maybe you feel rejection or maybe you’re easy to feel hurt or upset or angry, or any of these negative emotional patterns, the more negative emotional patterns you have, of course, the harder it’s going to be to stay in the positive and to really truly feel happy. So you’ll want to notice this in your day and kind of reflect and notice, do you have a lot of negative patterns or triggers that are going on that are keeping you from getting into the positive and even staying into the positive?
And if so, then you’ll want to make sure to make a point to release those deeper in the subconscious mind, which of course takes a bit of work, but is truly transformational. And so on that note, you’ll want to just look and notice, is that something that’s going on for you? And if so, you’ll want to look at doing some deeper work to transform them.
So that is number four on the countdown. And going into number three is that there are specific emotions that can literally block you from bringing in happiness. Now in my work, these are what I call NPPs, which are specific Negative Punishment Patterns that can block you from feeling good and happy.
And this could be a pattern such as guilt, for example. And so if you notice that you have patterns of guilt or self punishment or patterns like that, then you’ll want to focus on this specific thing because this can create a huge barrier for truly feeling happy and healthy in your life. And so if this is something that is impacting you, then this is what you’ll want to change at a deeper level in your subconscious mind, because these patterns can be very stuck.
You’ll want to make sure to truly transform them all of the way. Alright, so that one’s number three on the countdown. The second one is that our culture has a lot of programmed ways of dealing with emotions that aren’t good. When you think about it for a moment, for a lot of people, if something negative happens, they share it with others, they talk more about it.
Even when they go to try to resolve it, they’re talking more about it and talking more about it, and a lot of times what people end up doing is they end up kind of trauma bonding, even if they don’t mean to. And what I mean by that is, a lot of times if something upsets you or frustrates you or makes you feel in a state of fear, then what can happen is you can have emotions of bonding that come up when you share these things with somebody. That unfortunately creates more of the problem, meaning that, let’s say that something is going on that is negative and you share it with somebody and they say, oh, I completely understand, or I know what you mean. I have this issue too, and there’s that connection over the problem, then that can actually add more and more energy to the problem, which attracts more of the problem. So that is one way that the bond can be created over negativity. And I would say that that one is a lot more obvious than most of the other ones. A lot of the other ways that it can create a connection are subconscious or counterintuitive. For example, let’s say that somebody has this feeling of fear in life, and so they say, I’m stressed about this, this, and this, and they tell somebody else.
Now in the process of telling somebody else about this fear, the person can feel and experience emotions of feeling more safe, feeling like somebody’s got their back and they feel safe in that moment. Now, when you stop and think about it for a moment, this doesn’t typically make the situation safer.
However, a person can feel that way. For example, let’s say that somebody has been experiencing financial stress, and then they tell somebody else about it, and then that person says, yeah, I understand. I know what you mean. I have been too. Now, in that moment, that person can feel safer because they’re not the only person going through it and yada, yada, yada.
There can be a variety of different reasons that the person can feel and experience more feelings of safety. Now, in a very counterintuitive type of way, if a person has not been feeling a lot of feelings of safety, this can actually make a person want to have more issues to share with somebody, to trauma bond over, to experience more feelings of safety.
Now, I know that this doesn’t make any logical sense, so to speak, but what you want to remember is that emotions don’t make logical sense, and that’s part of the challenge with creating real change. Again, if you think about an example that I’ve used a lot on past episodes is that if you think about the unfortunate situation of a cutter, somebody who cuts themselves and experiences feelings of relief or euphoria from cutting themselves, obviously that doesn’t make logical sense, but that emotion gets linked up and so the person then feels that. And so similarly, a person who has a lot of problems or negativity who then shares it with somebody else, can experience a feeling of safety or feeling like somebody has their back.
Then what can happen is just like that, cutter can unfortunately experience feelings of relief from cutting themselves. A person can feel an experience, feelings of safety from having negative things happen because then they feel reassurance or comradery or connection or that feeling of safety from somebody else and talking to them about it. And so this is just one way, honestly. I can go on and on and on about the list of different ways that people feel when they share something that actually ends up perpetuating the problem. And so this is just an area that you want to be very careful and intentional in.
And by the way, if you have ever noticed me before where I’m working with somebody and I interrupt them, and I stop them from saying what they’re saying. The reason being is because is that, if they go into the old pattern and it somehow reinforces the negative, then I won’t be able to coach them to a point where their pain releases.
Instead, it could make the pain stay there and just reinforce their normal pattern. And so that’s why, again, if you’ve heard me interrupt somebody where they’re going to say something and I just stop them and interrupt. That’s why is because I know when it’s about to reinforce a specific pattern that they’ve gone into before and that can cause an issue, in which case I would never be able to get them to a place where they were able to use their own mind to release the pain because it just wouldn’t happen. That’s why it’s nice sometimes that I already know what the person is going to say and I can stop them before they say what they’re about to say. So that, of course, is very helpful in the process. But in your own life, you’ll want to know that in yourself and you want to make sure that you are not reinforcing any of those patterns and trauma bonding in any way.
Because that can perpetuate a problem that then can keep you from truly feeling happy, or at least make it a lot harder because the problems continue to persist, and that definitely makes it more challenging to really, genuinely feel happy. So that’s number two. And. Number one is that people end up accidentally doing a lot of things with the mind that they don’t realize is impacting them in a negative way.
And a lot of people don’t understand how the mind works and they unfortunately end up creating problems in their mind and in their nervous system, and they don’t mean to do. For example, let’s say somebody is walking around talking about the dangers of pollution and they’re wanting to share with people this and this and this.
Now what can happen is simultaneously they can create a lot of fear in their subconscious mind that then makes it a lot harder to be happy because they’re creating this feeling of fear of even breathing oxygen and I see this, or things like this all of the time, whether it’s some type of chemicals or, gluten or air or oxygen, just all kinds of things.
And I see people who have really good intentions, but they’re filling their minds with a subconscious feeling of anxiety at a deeper level by the way that they’re using their mind. And another example is something that I hear all of the time from people and it’s this. People will say, I just allow myself to feel whatever feelings come up for me and they feel like this is the best way to handle their emotions, as they just say, if I feel sad, I just allow myself to feel sad, and if I feel like crying, then I just allow myself to cry. And I just feel like the process is really releasing. And I actually recently had somebody, even in this past week, this person said that to the T they said, you know what? Whenever I feel sad, I just allow myself to feel sad, and if I feel, depressed, then I just allow myself to just feel that way. And this person was talking about that’s the way that they process their emotions. And I said to this person, okay, would that mean then if you are feeling that way so you just allow yourself, Now imagine if somebody is working on getting sober. And they feel like they want alcohol, so they just allow themselves to have it. Or they feel like they want drugs and they allow themselves to have it. Or somebody who’s even maybe had a food addiction who is working on changing that and they feel like they just want to eat because something negative or stressful happened in their life and theyso they feel like they want to eat something and so they just do every time. Or a cutter who is feeling off and has this urge to cut themselves, just allows themselves to cut themselves. Unfortunately what happens is that if we allow ourselves to keep doing what we’ve always done, we’ll get what we’ve always gotten.
And this person who said that to me, even in this past week. As somebody who has a major illness. And that’s actually why her and I were talking. And so in that moment she had this epiphany, like this realization that if she’s still injured, obviously she’s not doing the correct things with her mind for healing.
Because she’s been working on healing for many, many, many, many, many years. And yet she’s only continued to get worse and worse and worse. And so just recently I met her and said, okay, this is what you’ll want to start doing to, change that. And she had some resistance come up. She said, I just allow myself to feel the negative.
And I said, I get that’s what you normally do. But if you want a different result, you have to be willing to do things differently. And so point being on this one right here is that a lot of people are doing things with their mind that they think is positive, that is actually heading them in the wrong direction.
And unfortunately this is becoming very common. So much so that, there’s a big part of me that wants to put out a message to everybody that just says protect your mind. Because unfortunately it’s becoming more and more common. I’m literally seeing it everywhere and a lot of people just don’t realize that it’s happening.
And the best way to describe it, or something to compare it to would be the July effect. And if you’re familiar with the July effect, basically what that is, is there’s this phenomena that occurs that in medical hospitals. In July, there are typically a lot more deaths that happen in the month of July in a teaching hospital, and the reason that they’ve attributed that to is a lot of students are just graduating. And so in July there are a higher number of new doctors, so they’ve attributed the higher death rate to newer doctors coming into practice in the hospital.
Now, of course, that’s not to say anything negative about the medical community. there’s, different ways to look at it. And if you want to read more about the July effect, you can obviously go ahead and Google it, or I will also leave a link in the show notes for an article that’s from Harvard regarding the July effect, and so you can read more about it, but my point being is that, that’s a known awareness in the medical community that even happens when there are more new doctors that are going to work into the hospital. Now, if we look at working with the mind, if you look at it for a moment, there are people everywhere who have no background in working with the mind.
Who are creating meditations or working with the mind or creating an app. This is something that I’m seeing everywhere. There are marketers who have no real background with the mind or never really understood the mind who are making meditation apps. we’re seeing that show up everywhere.
Where again, young people who are great, youth is powerful and they don’t necessarily though have a lot of knowledge working with the mind and never created a real change. Or even I see all of the time people who have been working with diet or even a doctor who’s been working with medicine, who then thinks, okay, I know and I can see that the issue is with the mind so logically I should start working with the mind and I’ll see them, step in that direction and really start putting themselves out there working with the mind and meditation and all these things. And again, thinking that what they’re doing that as long as it’s said in a positive way, that it’s going to help people.
But that’s not the case. And it’s just a lot of people who are starting to work with the mind, who have no idea how It works and it’s concerning. And I think that we’re going to get to a point where we see a bigger backlash from it. But what will have to happen first, of course, is people will need to understand that it is something that’s going on with the mind, meaning this, meaning that all of the time I’ll see people who are in a state of having created issues in working with their mind, but they have no idea that that’s what caused it. And so because there’s so little knowledge in this area, people don’t even realize that that’s what’s causing it. And actually, interestingly enough, this past weekend, I was at a Christmas party with a bunch of my neighbors.
It was just, it was really sweet and it was wonderful to just sit and connect with neighbors. it was just really, really sweet. And I ended up getting on the conversation, of course, of working with the mind. And as I was talking more with neighbors and we were talking about different things and what people do for a living and all of these, different topics came up.
And this one woman that I was talking to mentioned that she was trying to do meditation and she had tried for a while, but the more that she tried meditating and just doing like silent meditation the more she would feel anxiety or the words that she used is the more her mind would race even more and more, and that as she was doing that, she started noticing that she was having physical issues come up.
And that’s something that I’ve seen all of the time. Where people, they start meditating and what happens is because they’re working with their mind in a way that’s actually ignoring the problem and just focusing on silencing the mind or putting the mind in a different state that what can happen is that whatever’s going on in the mind, if the mind, the energy, universe wants you to know something, if your body’s trying to tell you something, it’s like it starts speaking louder and louder. And so what she noticed in her situation is she started having health issues come up. The more she would meditate and when she stopped meditating, they would go away.
And that’s not the first time that I’ve heard that from people or seen that from people. But the thing of it is, is a lot of people don’t realize that it’s happening. So there are plenty of people who start meditating and then they have health issues come up and they go, oh, it’s a good thing I’m meditating now.
I’m going to meditate more. Because it’s divine timing that I’m starting to meditate while I have these health issues coming up. But they don’t realize that the very thing that they’re doing with their mind is actually making their body want to say something and speak or be heard. And I’ve seen that a lot too.
So point being from this one specifically is you’ll just want to notice what is true for you, what is happening in your world. So that’s part of it. And the other part is that just because something feels good doesn’t necessarily mean it is good. And you’ll want to really evaluate that. Meaning that to a cutter, cutting themselves feels good.
It’s relief. But of course we can see that logically, that somebody doesn’t want to continue cutting themselves. Now the thing of it is, is that a lot of the patterns that people do with the mind aren’t as obvious as that one is. And, of course I’m not saying that that one is just something people should just get over really easily.
I have absolute compassion for people who suffer from that issue, and so I get it. But just again, point being is that you’ll want to be acutely aware of what you are doing with your mind because more and more and more, I am seeing people who are doing a lot of things that they think that are really great for themselves and for their mind.
But are unfortunately backfiring and showing up in one way or another, but they just don’t realize what’s causing the problem. But point being is that we can see even in the medical field when there are a bunch of new doctors in a specific hospital, that there is an effect that takes place. And we can see the research from that.
And even Harvard has shown the research from that and the problem right now that’s going on is, of course there are a lot of new people in the mind space, people who are teaching yoga, who are leading meditations for people who don’t have any experience with the mind, but they just assume that it’s all benign.
That as long as you program in positivity that everything’s going to go great, but that’s not exactly true, and unfortunately, positive things can get linked up in negative ways, and I see that happen all of the time. And in fact, on our next episode coming up, I work with an actress who you may have seen before on the big screen, who is actually a volunteer on the podcast working with her mind.
And so she’s coming up. On the next episode, and what you’ll notice is there are some counterintuitive things that come up during her session where there are positive things that are linked up in a negative way that are impacting her. And so you’ll see how counterintuitive the mind can be coming up on that next episode. But right here, the thing you’ll want to note is that there are so many new people who are working with the mind, who have no clue what’s going on with the mind or even how to work with the mind that personally, I end up seeing a lot of people who have done things with their brain that then take some getting out of. They’re creating problems instead of resolving them. And even if you think about the woman on the past episode who was almost blind due to her beliefs with karma and spirituality and, those things, and of course when she started to shift her feelings towards karma, her eyesight came back. So you could see, literally that there are beliefs that are coming up with the spiritual community about things that people are teaching with the brain that are actually negatively impacting them.. And of course, that’s not the only episode.
There are other ones. That’s just the one that stands out the most. But when you stop and look around for a moment, there are people of all walks of life who are saying, oh, meditation is a great thing. And I see people with healing courses on how to heal your emotions and yourself. Who’ve never actually healed anybody before, and it’s becoming everywhere at this point.
And it’s something, of course that’s just going to continue to grow. And so I’m watching the repercussions unfortunately from it and trying to help people to see that there’s a way to work with the mind that does get real results. And so that’s of course part of the reason that I do this podcast is just because there are so many misconceptions out there.
And of course even science will openly say, we know very little about the brain. And a lot of things unfortunately that I see people doing with the mind are creating problems and are things that I’ve learned that you don’t want to do a certain way. And so point being here is that you’ll really want to make sure and assess the way that you are working with your mind and make sure you’re doing it in a positive way.
Because the woman that I just mentioned who said that her best way and most spiritual practice way was to allow herself to feel any emotion she was feeling. That, of course is a spiritual teaching that I hear more and more of, but considering the fact that she has major issues, we can see that it’s something that’s not working in a positive way.
And of course she’ll want to change it. And so on that note, let’s move into the positive. And that is actually number one, it is being willing to change because all of the time people are very attached typically, to the things that they’re doing with their mind. And when you stop and look at it and you really think about how the brain works, a lot of emotional patterns, they’re emotional addictions, it’s like we’re addicted to emotional patterns.
And so you’ll want to really be willing to change. And so that’s number one. And number two is what I mentioned in the very beginning, is that you will want to notice if you are doing any of these things. I would recommend making it a goal maybe in the new year to discontinue them and to really transform any of these things that you see showing up in your life.
So that’s number two. And number three has to do with deciding how you want to feel. And start getting that new feeling in. All too often people say, I don’t want to feel negative. I don’t want to feel this, or I don’t want to feel that. And what they’ll do is they’ll say, I’m just going to try to be positive.
Now, if you think about positive for a moment, the word just being positive isn’t really a feeling state. Now, if you think about feeling states. You can think about somebody being happy or somebody feeling really silly, or somebody feeling really grateful, or somebody feeling really excited or feeling euphoric or celebrating everything or laughing all the time, or somebody who’s feeling really loving all of the time. Now, when you stop and think about those different emotional patterns for a moment, one person can be really happy and so excited and another person can be happy and really loving all of the time, or another person can be very happy and outgoing. And point being is that these are all different emotions. Now to make a change, a real change in your life, and to make it easy, you’ll want to have a habit of happiness, meaning you’ll want to have programmed in positive emotions. Now, if you think about it for a moment, if you don’t program in positive emotions, it’s always going to take effort instead of becoming effortless.
Meaning this, if you think about any of the past episodes and you think about somebody who had a negative emotional pattern, they weren’t trying to go into the negative. The negative was just showing up in their life over and over and over. If you think about our beautiful volunteer, Vicki that we just had in the last episodes where she’s had this frustration and hurt and guilt and, these emotional patterns going on, she wasn’t trying to put them there.
It was showing up in her family life and also in her work life, and also with her relationship with her sister. And so there were multiple places that that was showing up in her life without her even trying. So that is the power of an emotional pattern that’s programmed in. Now, unfortunately, in this scenario, that’s a negative pattern.
But what if it was a positive pattern that was programmed in? What if there was some type of love pattern or confidence pattern, or happiness pattern, or euphoria pattern or love pattern that was programmed in to the subconscious mind, and it was just showing up over and over and over again in your life.
Now that, of course, is what you want, but when you stop and think about it for a moment, when it comes to happiness, people don’t do that. They say something like, I’m just going to work on being positive and thinking positive, which is a very broad statement, and that’s not necessarily a specific feeling pattern.
That’s a hundred different patterns, and so it’s hard to create a pattern from it if it’s just so spread out, if it’s so vague. And so that is the suggestion that I have for you, is to decide on one or two positive emotional patterns and really feel those and get those programmed in to your subconscious mind, so it just becomes your new norm.
Then it makes it easier to just feel this pattern. And by the way, in the very beginning when I mentioned that I have people all of the time who go through my courses and feel happiness like they’ve never felt before, that is because they’re basically implementing all of these things. They’re taking negative patterns and getting rid of them and creating positive patterns and getting them programmed into their subconscious mind.
And so then it makes it easy to just feel happy because it’s like you are programmed for happiness, literally. And so it makes it easy to feel happy when you’re not doing anything because that’s the way you just really, genuinely feel. So those are the insights that I wanted to share with you today on today’s quick IQ episode because ultimately when we really master these emotions at a deeper level, it becomes pivotal, life changing.
And so that, of course, is my hope for you. And if you’d like a deeper understanding of how mind body healing really works. Of course, I do have the free training that is available so you can actually see me working with people and demonstrating. How to get real results to be able to heal yourself. So if you want that deeper understanding, you can check that out.
It is also in the show notes so you can access it there. Because ultimately that is my goal, is if everybody understands how to heal their selves and change their lives. That becomes pivotal for our world. And so on that note, by the way, please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode.
You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know. Because the more that every single person feels empowered and can heal themselves, change their life, it really can help create a better world. For all of us. And so on that note also, I wish you an incredible rest of your day and I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
We’ll see you there.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. If you’d like to become a volunteer or join our members area, you can do so by visiting BrandyGillmore.com. Also, please remember to be responsible with your help. This podcast is for inspirational purposes only. You won’t want to make any changes to your medication or to your medical care based on this podcast, nor would you ever want to avoid seeing your doctor.
Instead, it’s best to see your doctor regularly. Keep them informed on what you are doing, and you could make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind. Thank you.
