IQ-110: Breaking the Fear Cycle: Empowering Children (And Ourselves) to Thrive

Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gilmore. And after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.

Let’s begin.

Hello, and welcome to this week’s Quick IQ Episode, where we talk about insights and questions. And today I want to talk about a topic that comes up all the time—in a variety of different ways. Where we’re going today is going to touch on childhood patterns and also on raising children and ways that you can help support them to have positive, happy, healthy, wonderful lives.

Understanding Emotional Patterns and Childhood Conditioning

There’s a powerful blend here that all comes together around feelings of being afraid or having anxiety. Of course, every emotional pattern can develop for a variety of different reasons, but what I want to explore today is something that is commonly overlooked—something I see all the time.

To dive in, let’s start by looking at childhood patterns. You’ve probably heard before: if a child doesn’t get positive attention, they’ll seek negative attention. What happens is that as children, the things we get connection and love for can continue as emotional patterns throughout our lives—either in positive ways or, unfortunately, in negative ones.

Another example I’ve shared before, if you’ve listened to past episodes, is the unfortunate story of the woman with the abusive father who leaves him, only to find the abusive boyfriend, boss, or spouse. That painful pattern can repeat itself—until we consciously heal and transform those wounds.

Too often, I’ve seen people who’ve had these exact patterns, and when we shift them at the subconscious level, it transforms not just their pain but their health, happiness, and overall life in the most beautiful way.

The Hidden Pattern of Fear and Safety

Now, let’s take a moment to look specifically at the pattern of being afraid. Emotional patterns can show up in many ways, but something I see all the time—and that you’ll want to be mindful of if you’re a mom, or even if you’re working on transforming your own subconscious patterns—is this:

It’s common for people, during their early years, to experience moments of fear—maybe a bad dream, or being afraid of a dog, or some other event. What can happen is that if, during those moments of fear, the child receives a lot of nurture and comfort—perhaps getting to sleep in their parents’ bed, or receiving extra love and attention—then feelings of love become subconsciously linked with fear.

Over time, this can create a subconscious pattern where, whenever that person feels afraid, they instinctively seek someone to comfort or “coddle” them. Fear becomes a gateway to connection, even though consciously, of course, that’s not what we want.

This is similar to the earlier example—the woman with the abusive father. She doesn’t consciously want an abusive relationship; consciously she wants love, safety, and kindness. But subconsciously, those old emotional linkages are still operating.

Recognizing and Transforming the Pattern

So, the insight here is simple but powerful: if you have a pattern of feeling afraid, start by becoming consciously aware of it. Notice if part of you reaches out for love or safety when you’re afraid. That pattern can impact your health, confidence, and emotional energy in deep ways.

And the goal isn’t to reject those feelings—it’s to transform them. To reprogram your mind and emotions to experience true safety from within, rather than from fear-based connection.

Supporting Children in Building Healthy Emotional Programming

If you’re a mom working on raising happy, healthy, emotionally aware children—first, thank you. It’s beautiful that you’re nurturing awareness in your kids.

Now, when it comes to feelings of fear, it’s important to remember that we live in a world where fear is everywhere. There’s fear in the media, fear in our conversations, fear in the collective consciousness. Helping children develop mental and emotional resilience is key.

If your kids are feeling afraid, instead of coddling them with extra attention that reinforces the fear, help them feel safe from within. Teach them to find and embody feelings of safety and confidence. This way, rather than linking love and security with fear, they associate those feelings with their own inner stability.

Imagine a child whose subconscious programming says: “When I feel afraid, I look for safety within myself.” That child grows up with an inner sense of confidence and trust in life—because they know how to find calm and security from within. That is a powerful foundation for a happy, healthy, successful life.

Fear, Confidence, and Emotional Energy

As adults, it’s hard to feel truly confident if you’re carrying deep patterns of fear. I see this all the time—people who want to embody more confidence, yet have subconscious programming filled with fear about life, success, or safety. The two can’t coexist easily. So healing fear is essential to cultivating authentic confidence and vitality.

Reprogramming Fear into Safety and Confidence

That brings us to today’s quick IQ insight. If you have a pattern of feeling afraid—or if you notice that your children are showing signs of this pattern—you’ll want to make sure not to feed or reinforce it. Instead, focus on transforming it. Genuinely reprogram your mind and emotions to experience feelings of safety, happiness, and confidence in life.

As we all know, when fear and anxiety are running in the background of the mind, life can feel incredibly hard. During my own injury, I experienced that firsthand—living with constant fear. Fear of not getting better. Fear of losing everything. Fear of missing out on life. It was exhausting. I wasn’t in a good place mentally or emotionally.

But when I learned how to understand and work with my mind—when I discovered how to radically shift my inner patterns—everything began to change. My health changed. My emotions changed. My life changed. And yes, a big part of that healing was releasing fear and reprogramming my subconscious mind to feel truly safe again.

Creating Positive Emotional Patterns

So, my invitation for you is this: take a moment to look at your life. If you recognize patterns of fear—whether in yourself or in your children—make a conscious decision to transform them. It’s not about avoiding emotions; it’s about creating new, healthier emotional linkages in the mind.

When you consistently embody feelings of safety, confidence, and happiness, your mind begins to associate those states with love and connection. Over time, this reprogramming supports your health, energy, and overall well-being in the most beautiful way.

That’s what today’s episode is really about—recognizing those subtle emotional patterns and empowering yourself (and your loved ones) to create new ones that uplift and heal.

Sharing and Spreading Positive Energy

And as always, I want to ask you to please take a moment to share this episode. Share it with someone you love, someone you care about, or even someone you don’t know personally. Because the more happy and healthy each person becomes, the better our world is for everyone.

Please do hit that share button, and make it a point to have the most wonderful, loving, and joy-filled rest of your day. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We’ll see you there.

Closing Message

Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. So many people reach out to say how much these episodes have given them hope, touched their hearts, or helped them stay positive through difficult times—and sometimes even awakened them to a completely new level of awareness about how amazing we truly are.

If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor—share it with those you care about, or with anyone you know who could really use it. As more and more people become empowered, we truly can change our world for the better.

That is the point and the power of these demonstrations—to create a radical shift in our collective consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.

Following Through on Your Healing

Of course, each volunteer on the show must follow through to reinforce their new programming and maintain their results. But the larger message for you is this: you truly can create rapid results in your health and your life if you understand how to use your mind. You are incredible.

Now, I do want to be clear—most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look easy because of the discoveries I’ve made, but remember, there’s much more happening in our minds at a deeper level than we often realize.

If you have questions or comments, you can visit me at brandygillmore.com/podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.

A Loving Reminder

Lastly, please remember: if you have any health issues, don’t avoid your doctors. Continue seeing them—and make it your goal to amaze them with what you’re capable of achieving with your mind.

Thank you.