Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I’ll even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind, and then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Let’s begin.
Hello and happy beautiful day to you. Today I want to talk about or answer a question that I’ve gotten so often over the years, and it’s this—people often ask, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” Now, of course, it’s not just bad things happening to good people. Bad things can happen to people who maybe haven’t had the greatest actions throughout their lives.
4 Subconscious Reasons Why Negative Experiences Happen
#4 – Struggle for Connection and Undeservingness
There’s an underlying key why negative things can happen that is so often overlooked. Technically, we’re going to talk about four of those keys today.
Starting with number four: What can happen is a person can have a feeling of pride in hardship—where they’ve had a lot of hardship going on. Or, and I’ve seen this so often, a person may have a feeling of wanting to connect with someone else who’s struggling. And so, inside, they feel as though if they’re struggling too, it creates a connection.
They may even feel guilt if their life is great and wonderful and fantastic while the people around them aren’t doing as well. What can happen is that a person can literally feel guilty or undeserving, or feel bad if things are great in their life. Instead, they can feel a subconscious pull that says, “If my friend or family is struggling, then I should be too.”
Now, of course, consciously they don’t want that struggle—but that subconscious pattern can attract negative circumstances and situations into a person’s life.
#3 – Punishment and Guilt Programming
Now going to number three. Sometimes people have very rigid punishment programming—they feel like they should be punished. They feel guilty if they do this thing or that thing. They feel guilty over nothing.
That’s my example of survivor’s guilt. If you know my story, part of what impacted me during my healing from injury was a feeling of surviving the events of 9/11—but feeling guilty about it. So that doesn’t make any logical sense, but even when these patterns don’t make logical sense, they can still impact us.
I see that all the time. I’ll see people who feel guilty for thinking they’re a bad mother. Even when they stop and look at it—and I laugh because I’ll say, “Wait a second, what are you doing?”—and they start to realize they’re not horrible. But because they weren’t perfect, they beat themselves up. They feel guilty. Then, they end up with health issues or other problems—and that contributes to it.
#2 – Projecting Punishment onto Others
Number two is this: Sometimes people, inside their heads, feel like other people should be punished. So because they have these patterns, they feel like, “Oh, so-and-so is bad,” or “So-and-so is a sinner,” or “That person’s doing something wrong.”
They have a lot of rigid patterns around the idea that others deserve punishment. It’s not necessarily that they want to do the punishing themselves, but it’s a belief or feeling inside them. And the problem is, the more the mind is filled with “this person should be punished, that person should be punished,” it can reflect back on the self.
That same person then feels like they should be punished. And so, that pattern continues to show up. I see that all the time.
If you’re feeling like others need to be punished, it can reflect. So instead, if people make a mistake, wish them kindness. Wish them correction. Wish them course correction and kindness.
Because let’s be honest—if everybody around the world was just kind and loving and in great integrity, what would our world look like? It would be amazing, beautiful, and incredible.
Conversely, if we look around the world and everybody’s being punished for every mistake they’ve ever made—what does the world look like then? Not good.
So yes, I know some people might say, “How could you wish everybody kindness and correction?” But let’s be honest—wouldn’t that be fantastic?
If everyone just kindly corrected, the world would be incredible. So wish them correction. And not only that—if you make a mistake, then what reflects back to you is not, “I need to be punished,” or “I should feel horrible.” It’s, “Okay, I made a mistake. Let me give myself kindness and correction.”
We are human beings. We can make mistakes. A five-year-old will make mistakes. A twenty-year-old will make mistakes. And so will you. So just shifting that framing around punishment can really help both you and the energy around you.
#1 – Good Person, But Patterns Still Persist
Now the number one reason I see is this: People might feel like, “I’m a great person,” and so they automatically feel like, “I do deserve a good life.” And they feel that way consciously.
But at a deeper level, they’re not really changing their patterns. And the truth is—even if we’re a great person—if we’re not changing those underlying subconscious patterns, then those patterns can still show up in our lives.
The example I always talk about with repatterning is this: In psychology, it’s well-known that a woman may have an abusive father, then leave him and find an abusive boyfriend, boss, or spouse. The pattern, unfortunately, continues.
Of course, that’s not because she’s a bad person or she deserves it—but the pattern continues.
And that’s true in everybody’s life. Not with that same scenario, but maybe it’s a hardship pattern, or a rejection pattern, or an upset pattern. These subconscious patterns continue. So people say, “I’m a good person. I deserve a great life.” And they feel that way… but the underlying subconscious patterns are still running and showing up in a variety of ways.
We are human beings. We come in with different patterns. Addressing them, changing them, transforming them—that’s what helps us heal and change our entire lives.
So again, people ask me all the time: “Why do bad things happen to good people?” And the answer? Patterns, patterns, patterns. The subconscious mind can be so counterintuitive, but once we really master it, it can be pivotal.
Understanding Emotional Distinctions and the Mind’s Complexity
That leads to another insight—which is this: A lot of times when people start working with their minds, they don’t think about the distinctions between emotions.
To me, distinction is everything. You’ve heard me use this analogy before—it’s like somebody playing music. Let’s say someone’s playing guitar, or another musical instrument, or singing. A C note and a G note are very different. A G and a G sharp are very different.
If they want to master music, they need to know those notes are different. Hugely different. But to someone who isn’t skilled in music, they might say, “It’s so close. Pretty much the same.” When it’s not.
Or think about someone using a computer. Someone who isn’t that great with it might say, “Oh, you just do this simple thing.” But someone who’s a skilled programmer has a whole different level of awareness of what’s going on at a deeper level.
And the same is true with the subconscious mind. The more you understand the specifics, the easier it is to create real change.
Think about what most people do with mind programming. They try to think positively, or meditate, or do breath work. And I get it—those can be helpful. But really understanding the mind—that was what changed everything for me.
I had been working with my mind for many, many years. Over six years. I tried every single program out there, everything I could get my hands on. Trying to heal. Trying to change.
But when I really applied myself and understood how the mind worked—that’s when everything changed.
I say this all the time—people with multiple personality disorder (now called dissociative identity disorder)—that was pivotal in seeing the mind’s power. If you’re new to this, by the way, people with this condition can have different illnesses in different personalities.
One personality can have one illness. Another personality—completely different illness. Same body, different illness. Medically documented. That, to me, was eye-opening.
Now, of course, that wasn’t enough to heal. I still had to figure out how the mind worked. But that’s the thing—when it comes to patterns and emotions and energies running at a deeper level, when you identify what’s going on for you and really change it, it’s incredible. Life-changing. Health-changing. Everything.
The Power of Real Change
So those are the insights I wanted to share with you today. Just know this: Good things can happen. And they can keep happening. They can grow and expand.
I see it all the time—people are changing, they’re growing, and life is getting better and better, happier and happier.
But it takes a real change. A real, actual, internal transformation. That’s what it takes.
So just food for thought.
And by the way—if you’re somebody who’s new to healing, if you’re wondering things like “How do you heal yourself?” “How do you get results?” “How do you work with the mind?”—I do have a training on my website at BrandyGillmore.com. You can come join that training or get the link directly from the site.
Ultimately, what I’d love to see is everybody heal themselves and change their life. That’s my hope, of course.
Sharing the Message and Spreading Hope
And on that note, I ask you to please take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode. Share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about—or even somebody you don’t know.
The more every single person in our world is happy, healthy, loved, and loving, the better this world is for all of us.
So please do take a moment to hit the share button. And please do have an incredible rest of your day.
Closing Reflections and Empowerment
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life.
People often reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope, touched their heart, helped them stay positive in hard times—or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are.
If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor—share it with those you care about or someone who really needs it.
As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations—to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.
And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming and maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand how to use your mind.
You are incredible.
I do want to be clear though: most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look very easy because of the discoveries I made. You’ll want to remember—there’s so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize.
That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at BrandyGillmore.com/podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, please remember—if you do have any health issues, don’t avoid your doctors. Continue seeing them. But make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of—with your mind.
Thank you.
