IQ-233: One Simple but Profound Shift That Can Open Self-Love and Self-Healing

Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life. My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.

Each week I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I’ll even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind, and then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind, your emotions, and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.

Let’s begin.

Hello and happy beautiful day to you. Today I want to talk about the topic of self-awareness and also self-love and self-healing and personal transformation, but really the awareness at the deeper level of the importance of awareness and the importance of details.

The Subtle Difference Between Self-Compassion and Self-Love

This is what I mean. I want to give you a simple example, and it’s this:

So often I’ll see people who have been working on feelings of self-love and they’re feeling stuck. Also, it doesn’t feel so fulfilling to them. Now, there are multiple reasons that that can happen, but I want to highlight something that I see all of the time.

All of the time, I’ll see people who have this feeling of a lot of self-compassion, but so much so that it feels more like self-sympathy.

And by the way, I want to be clear: During my injury—when I was wheelchair, walker, cane, an absolute mess for almost seven years—were there times that I felt sorry for myself? There absolutely were. It wasn’t helpful, but I was there, and then I had to pull myself out of it. So I get it.

But what can happen—I’ve seen so often—is where people are working on healing themselves, or even just life transformation or relationships or whatever it is, but working on creating a transformation in their lives, feeling better, emotional wellness, all of the things. And unfortunately, what can happen is that they’re bringing in a lot of feelings of self-compassion. So much so that they start bringing in a feeling of self-sympathy.

This is the issue: Imagine for a moment somebody who brings in a feeling of self-sympathy, where they’re feeling sorry. There’s a huge amount of self-compassion, so much so that it ends up being self-sympathy.

What that pattern looks like compared to somebody who brings in a feeling of self-love and they really just love who they are. Like they have this feeling where they say, “You know what? I just really love who I am.” They feel that—not in an arrogant way or a superiority way or anything like that. But a feeling of loving self and also loving others, where they feel like, “I love life. I love self. I love people. I love friends.” But they really, really feel that.

That energy is magnetic. It’s incredible. It’s beautiful. From that energy, the confidence, the amount somebody can heal and flourish by really feeling this healthy feeling of loving who they are—it’s incredible.

Now, the problem—and it might seem like a small distinction—is that when people bring in a lot of feelings of self-compassion, so much so that it ends up feeling like self-sympathy. Like, “Oh, sorry, self, that happened. Sorry, self, that happened.”

What can happen is, of course, patterns breed more of the same, so it can attract more and more and more of that sympathy type of feeling.

I know for a lot of people this might seem like a very small distinction, but think about somebody who lives a life feeling a sense of self-sympathy, and somebody who lives a life feeling that they love who they are. There’s a big difference.

That genuine feeling of self-love can help you to flourish in every area.

Self-Love Shouldn’t Be Conditional on Pain or Hardship

And so, food for thought. Now, part of the reason that I’m pointing this out is, of course, because of self-love—and just because I see this all of the time. I’ll even see people who will do things like this:

Where things are hard in life—maybe they have a challenge, or they feel like something negative happened, or maybe they had a health issue or whatnot—and then from that, they go, “Okay, well, I’m gonna be extra nice to myself.”

They have some health issue, a blood draw, or this or that, and then they say, “Okay, well, I’m gonna treat myself nice.”

And I always tell people: Wait a second. Don’t treat yourself nice because you had a problem or a hardship or a health issue. Treat yourself nice because it’s the right thing to do. Treat yourself nice because you deserve it—regardless of having a health issue or not.

You don’t need to have a health issue to do something nice for yourself. And so, food for thought.

Insights for Real Self-Love and Personal Transformation

The insights that I want to share today, the quick insights, are just:

1. Make sure as you’re bringing in self-love, that you bring in the feeling of just genuinely loving who you are. And when you do that, it’s also really good energy to bring in a feeling of love towards others too, so it doesn’t feel like arrogance or superiority—but just this feeling of love and sweetness.
2. Make sure you’re not doing it because of hardship or problems, or doing nice things for yourself because of that. Do it just because you’re you. Because you’re wonderful, beautiful you.

So those are the insights that I want to share.

Another one is just the awareness that so often people, when they work with the mind, they just try to say, “Oh, well, let me just think positive,” or “Let me just meditate.” It’s like they try to put everything in one basket.

And the truth of it is: It’s just like a computer. Our brains are so amazing and incredible with what we’re capable of. But with a computer, the more we understand the details, the easier it is to use. The more we know how to use it, the easier it is.

And if we just tried to use a computer and didn’t have much of an understanding, but just kind of threw commands at it and hoped it works out—it probably wouldn’t be the best approach.

So similar with the mind—you know, the more that you understand the mind and how it works and you dial in this acute awareness, the more everything works. The easier it is. The more you just—you see it, you get it. And it’s incredible.

Now, the problem—and it might seem like a small distinction—is that when people bring in a lot of feelings of self-compassion, so much so that it ends up feeling like self-sympathy. Like, “Oh, sorry, self, that happened. Sorry, self, that happened.”

What can happen is, of course, patterns breed more of the same, so it can attract more and more and more of that sympathy type of feeling.

I know for a lot of people this might seem like a very small distinction, but think about somebody who lives a life feeling a sense of self-sympathy, and somebody who lives a life feeling that they love who they are. There’s a big difference.

That genuine feeling of self-love can help you to flourish in every area.

Self-Love Shouldn’t Be Conditional on Pain or Hardship

And so, food for thought. Now, part of the reason that I’m pointing this out is, of course, because of self-love—and just because I see this all of the time. I’ll even see people who will do things like this:

Where things are hard in life—maybe they have a challenge, or they feel like something negative happened, or maybe they had a health issue or whatnot—and then from that, they go, “Okay, well, I’m gonna be extra nice to myself.”

They have some health issue, a blood draw, or this or that, and then they say, “Okay, well, I’m gonna treat myself nice.”

And I always tell people: Wait a second. Don’t treat yourself nice because you had a problem or a hardship or a health issue. Treat yourself nice because it’s the right thing to do. Treat yourself nice because you deserve it—regardless of having a health issue or not.

You don’t need to have a health issue to do something nice for yourself. And so, food for thought.

Insights for Real Self-Love and Personal Transformation

The insights that I want to share today, the quick insights, are just:

1. Make sure as you’re bringing in self-love, that you bring in the feeling of just genuinely loving who you are. And when you do that, it’s also really good energy to bring in a feeling of love towards others too, so it doesn’t feel like arrogance or superiority—but just this feeling of love and sweetness.
2. Make sure you’re not doing it because of hardship or problems, or doing nice things for yourself because of that. Do it just because you’re you. Because you’re wonderful, beautiful you.

So those are the insights that I want to share.

Another one is just the awareness that so often people, when they work with the mind, they just try to say, “Oh, well, let me just think positive,” or “Let me just meditate.” It’s like they try to put everything in one basket.

And the truth of it is: It’s just like a computer. Our brains are so amazing and incredible with what we’re capable of. But with a computer, the more we understand the details, the easier it is to use. The more we know how to use it, the easier it is.

And if we just tried to use a computer and didn’t have much of an understanding, but just kind of threw commands at it and hoped it works out—it probably wouldn’t be the best approach.

So similar with the mind—you know, the more that you understand the mind and how it works and you dial in this acute awareness, the more everything works. The easier it is. The more you just—you see it, you get it. And it’s incredible.

So, food for thought. And it has been such a pleasure connecting with you.

As always, please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode. Share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know.

Because the more that every single person in our world feels happy and healthy and loved and loving, the better this world is for all of us.

And so please do take a quick moment to hit the share button, and please do make a point to have an incredible rest of your day. I’ll see you on the next episode.

Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life.

All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touched their heart or helped them stay positive in hard times—or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are.

If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really need it.

As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations—to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.

And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming, to maintain their results. But the point is for you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand how to use your mind.

You are incredible.

And I do want to be clear, though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made.

You’ll want to remember that there’s so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize.

That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my website at brandygillmore.com/podcast.

And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.

Lastly, please remember: If you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you’ll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind.