Welcome to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. I’m Brandy Gillmore and what I’m most known for is helping people to create radical transformations and even demonstrating the power of the mind and self-healing under medical equipment so you can see the results and my work has even been published in a medical journal because it’s truly incredible what we are all capable of when we understand our own minds at a deeper level.
So whether you’re new to this work or you’ve been studying the power of the mind for many years. I love that you are here. I love that we’re on this incredible journey together, and I look forward to sharing breakthrough information with you. That said, on this podcast, I’ll share two types of episodes.
First, self-healing episodes, where I share key insights from working with live volunteers. And the second type are where I answer questions from the audience. That said, if you’d like to volunteer or submit a question, come visit me at BrandyGillmore.com. On that note, let’s dive in.
Hello and welcome. It is so wonderful to connect with you today. I want to answer a question that came in from a listener regarding the topic of feeling stuck, feeling depleted and always caregiving for others, and always putting others first. And this is a topic I’ve seen so many times where people feel depleted or even beyond depleted and there’s not a way out.
Now this particular person who wrote in has been in a place where she’s been stuck caring for her husband, who’s been extremely ill. This has been her situation for years and years, and she says, just how do I get out of this? And I see that so often, unfortunately, where people might feel stuck in that type of role, or even with children and family and everything, that they just feel like there’s never any time for themselves and that they’re depleted. And that’s what I want to speak to for a moment because so often when it comes to patterns and life, there can be that feeling of stuckness. Like there’s no way out. And I get that because it doesn’t just show up in the caregiving role, it can really show up in any area of life because that’s how patterns work, unfortunately, is that it can make you feel stuck because ultimately it’s like the same thing keeps creating over and over.
And even if somebody stuck in a pattern of rejection. They could feel that same thing where they feel like there’s no way out, if you will, because the pattern can feel like it keeps repeating and repeating where somebody can feel also in a place of loneliness where they feel like no matter what they do, they can’t get out because that pattern keeps repeating.
And so the same can be true with caregiving and putting everybody else first or that pattern of feeling depleted. Is just these patterns, when they repeat, it just can feel so frustrating and stuck and like there’s no way out. And, one way to think about it is even, in some cases where it’s like trying to stand up if you will, but having always that glass ceiling.
And so no matter what you do, it’s like you can’t stand up or you can’t get out of it, or it just repeats and it’s like one day goes into the next, into the next and there’s not a way out. And that’s what I want to share is just a few insights on how to get out of that. Because so often life can feel that way.
And that’s part of the reason that I wanted to bring in a few different examples is because it is common. Most people will think something like this. They say, but my situation is different. I’m just stuck…And that’s how we feel as human beings. It’s like if we’re in a situation that’s it can feel so stuck. And I can tell you that all of the time with illness or problems, people feel that very way. And so as you’re listening to this right now, if you are somebody who’s felt stuck in a certain area, the biggest thing that I want to emphasize is there is always, always, always, always a reason and a pattern.
And I have seen all of the time when people identify the specific pattern and understand it and change it, that that’s when it becomes pivotal. And of course, in changing it, sometimes it’s just a pattern, like an emotional pattern. Sometimes it’s the emotional pattern and then the action that follows.
But it’s always, always, always some type of pattern that’s showing up. And to give you a few examples, I’ve seen people who have been stuck in extreme hardship and maybe they had a strong pattern of feeling deserving punishment. So they felt they were so punishing and guilty and ridden with guilt that it’s like life felt so depleting, or in other cases, I’ve seen people who have had deep patterns of self-sacrifice where they just over and over and over and the idea of doing anything for themselves, they feel guilty. So if they did something for themselves, they’d feel so guilty that their life reflects that, they can’t do anything for themselves.
And if they did, they would feel guilty. Or I’ve seen other people before where they’ve learned that they’re supposed to put themselves last and everybody first. And that’s what they learned at a very core level, at a very young age growing up. And so their life then reflects that very thing.
And so that’s the insight that I want to invite you to look at for a moment is whatever your life, if your life is reflecting some type of situation that feels really stuck, that feels impossible to get out of looking at what is the pattern. And, by the way, in some cases I’ve worked with people before who felt like at a very young age that they were never allowed to do anything. And for example, I worked with a woman who, at a very young age, she felt like her mom never let her go anywhere. So she always felt like she had to stay home and her mom never let her go anywhere. And she was so hurt and frustrated about that.
And then she grew up and those same type of situation and circumstances happened. Like basically she then grew up and had a child, absolutely loved her children. But also had that same feeling, that feeling like she’s never allowed to go anywhere because she has to do something for everybody else. And, so there was that pattern and, as much as she loved her children, she also just wanted a couple moments to herself.
And so of course, in her mind, she felt like it was just having children. That’s just how it is. That’s just how it is. And yet there are other situations where people do have lives, where they have children and they can do things for themselves, and they have that balance and they have that structure. But it does take that real change.
And so where people also have had patterns where they feel like, whatever their spouse says they have to do or be. But that’s exactly the point is again, there are so many different combinations of patterns that perpetuate, but that’s the very thing I want to invite you to look at is that if you are stuck or if you feel stuck all of the time, even though it may feel impossible, if you identify the specific pattern and shift it, that’s when the transformation takes place. Now, by the way, I have seen people before that have…one pattern. A couple other ways that this can show up as this is that sometimes people may have a feeling of fear of moving forward or some type of procrastination of something they’re not wanting to do. And for example, I’ve seen people who felt like… They had to put everybody else first and they didn’t know what they really wanted to do with their lives. And so it felt safer to have one distraction after another, after another, after another.
Because they didn’t know what they wanted moving forward, so that felt unsafe. So that might be something as well. And so looking at this with an open mind…Now, by the way, I’ve seen other people before who maybe moving forward had some type of guilt issue or integrity issue. And for example, I’ve worked with people who wanted to write a, book about something, let’s say about, real estate or whatever it was, a book about something, and that moving forward.
They were taking information from other people’s books and whatnot. And, so what happened is that because then they were taking other people’s information, there was a major integrity issue because they weren’t crediting or getting permission or whatever it was. And so there was an integrity issue.
And so they were trying to move forward and there was one distraction after another, after another, after another that kept coming into their lives. And so they felt like they could never do anything for themselves. Because they were stuck there. And so that’s another direction to look as well. But I can tell you…my heart goes out because the email that came in was basically, and I see this, again, I’ve seen this so many times, was a listener who said, I’ve been in this situation and basically she said, look, I am crying myself to sleep every night. And I’ve been stuck in this situation for years and years and years and I didn’t know how to get out and that. It just, you know what it feels like to feel stuck and to feel like that for somebody, So I just have so much compassion and so basically what I would say is that very thing is look at that situation and realize, like even in that situation of the person who wrote in the email, that pattern started at age six, and so in her youth. And so what happens is that feeling of I can’t ever do what I want to do, and then it shows up over and over and over, and somebody’s entire life feels that way, feels stuck, feels locked, and feels unable to move.
And so my point is exactly that. I invite you to, look at your own life and if there’s a place that you’re feeling stuck instead of feeling frustrated or angry, or even just looking at all the outside circumstances and saying, it’s because of the children, or because of this, or because of that, and yes, absolutely it absolutely can be because of outside, external experiences, but it also always starts from within. And so creating that change on the inside, giving yourself a feeling that you do deserve a great life, that you do deserve time to yourself, that feeling that you are an integrity, you are a good person, but feeling that feeling of being able to have you time and deserving that and feeling that.
And if you have any patterns that say otherwise. Working on shifting those so you can create the change. Because your soul, your happiness, your growth, your life, your future, you know when you get time for you, the more you do that, the more you can get out of it. And by the way, the analogy that you hear me use all of the time is this, is that if you’ve ever heard the phrase before, feeling stuck between a rock and a hard place where a person feels stuck and they feel like they can’t get out. So if you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place, if you’ve heard that phrase, you’re stuck. You’re stuck. What is the only way out? The only way out if you feel stuck between a hard rock and a hard place?
Up is lifting yourself. So you’ve got to lift, you’ve got to be willing to shift to change. That’s what happens is the more you start lifting yourself, the more you can get out of that situation, and then your life can begin to shift and change as you do that. And so instead of ever letting yourself feeling depleted and down and frustrated and stuck and deeper, and deeper, and deeper into the hole in that negative place, being willing to change. Now, I know it’s easier, quote unquote said than done, if you will, except for the fact that I did that. Like the hole that I was in, I was an absolute mess during my injury. And you hear me talk about it all the, that all the time. I was in a really, really, really bad spot. My point is that lifting yourself. If I say just, oh, well just lift yourself. I get that it takes effort, so I don’t want to sound like, I’m just like, oh, just lift and be happy and positive. I know it takes effort and I know it takes a real change and it takes really reprogramming your mind. It absolutely does. So I don’t want to say it just casually just lift and think positive.
It’s not that, it’s more than that.But it’s still the answer is creating that change is working on really feeling different. And I have to tell you, when I was at my worst, worst, worst spot, that’s what kind of woke me up to say, look …my mind scared me so much. I was in such a low place that my mind scared me.
Like I had never felt so low and it was just like I have to lift, I have to shift, I have to change. And so no matter where you are, if you’re there, if you’re in a better place than that or, wherever you are, if you’re feeling stuck, remember, I have never seen anybody who has been stuck like people think they are.
I thought I was. I see people all the time, but when you really look and identify what’s going on in the inside, what pattern is it and shift it and change it and lift yourself, it’s pivotal. So don’t ever feel like you’re stuck. Don’t. Just get unstuck, and not feeling like you’re truly, truly stuck.
I get that it can feel that way, but creating that change is key. So that’s the insight that I wanted to share today is exactly that. Shifting, taking your life to the next level. You deserve it. There was a time when I wanted to check out from life and I’m so glad I didn’t. I’m so glad instead that I really decided to change. And so that’s the biggest insight that I want to share is you’re worth it. Life is worth it. and the more you lift and the more you shift, the better things really, really do get. And so food for thought and that’s today’s quick IQ episode. And of course, by the way, if you are somebody who is wanting and needing to make a deeper shift, I do have a video course that can help walk you through creating these real changes.
Or if you’re somebody who’s working on healing yourself, and wants to know more information on doing so, I do have a free training as well, so check that out. As always, I want to ask you to please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode. share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know.
Because the more that every single person in our world feels healthy and happy and loved and loving, truly, the better this world is for all of us. And so please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button and please do make a point to have an incredible rest of your day. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
We’ll see you there.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself. Change Your Life. If you’d like to become a volunteer or join our members area, you can do so by visiting BrandyGillmore.com. Also, please remember to be responsible with your health. This podcast is for inspirational purposes only. You won’t want to make any changes to your medication or to your medical care based on this podcast, nor would you ever want to avoid seeing your doctor.
Instead, it’s best to see your doctor regularly. Keep them informed on what you are doing, and you could make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind. Thank you.
